Traditionally, who do you pick as witnesses?

Hi Girls

Wondered if you can help me out with this one, my Mum has just let slip that my Dad is expecting to be a witness.

I had been planning to ask one of my good friends to do this for me, but I don't want to upset my Dad.

Is it traditional for the Father of the Bride to be a witnes???

Please help

C xx


  • jaynekukjaynekuk Posts: 2,893
    I havent been to a wedding where the Father of the bride is a witness.

    Usually its a best friend or sister.

    Sorry not much help.

    jayne.x :\)
  • tradition says witnesses are the best man and the chief bridesmaid but in reality you can have who you like as long as they are over 18.

    We had both our mums, to give them an official job in our day and I know CCharli had 4 witnesses.

    Do what is right for you and your situation.

  • Hey

    We are planning to ask our Mum's as well - they do so much work in the run up so want to give them an important job for the day.

    But choose who you want...its you day.

    Good louck

  • -kia--kia- Posts: 745
    Everyone who I've talked to about this says best man and chief bridesmaid. The only one who seems to have a different opinion is my dad who thinks it should be both dads!

    We are having 4 - best man, a bridesmaid (i dont have a chief bridesmaid so i just picked one) and we each picked a friend.

    Doesnt matter what tradition says anyway - have whoever you want
  • racheljparkerracheljparker Posts: 1,515
    We are having our mums too

  • Watson2bWatson2b Posts: 215
    I would really like to ask SIL2B to be a witness for us but we already have two witnesses. If you have more than two what do they all do because I thought you just needed two to sign your register? Sorry if thats a silly question!
  • (This post has been deleted.)
  • I'm having two friends, one male and one female who were the ones who introduced me to my h2b. Seemed the natural choice. I think as with everything else wedding related you can have whatever you want! Who made all these silly rules up anyway? I'm all for rule breaking!!! Who's with me?
  • Watson2bWatson2b Posts: 215
    Glad its not just me Lyndsey!

  • jadeanna20jadeanna20 Posts: 128
    God i hadnt even thought of this, i think we will probs be having 1 member from each family,
  • To answer Watson2b's question, you HAVE to have two witnesses for it to be legal on the day but there is room in the register for up to four to sign. We are currently having three, my brother, H2B's chief usher (the really close friend he didn't ask to be best man), and H2B's sister. H2B's sister gets terribly self-conscious in public and isn't sure she wants to do it, so the registrar is going to check with her on the day. If she doesn't want to do it, it won't be a problem because we will still have our two witnesses to make things legal. Our registrar does something similar for couples who want a witness who is under 18 (one of the couples' child or godchild usually). They have two adult witnesses for the legalities but the younger 'witness' is also called up to sign the register.

    As for tradition, yes, I suspect the oldest tradition would be the two fathers as witnesses because they would have been the legal heads of families and thus the only ones qualified to stand as formal witnesses. But, in fact, the entire congregation acts as witness to the marriage; the two who sign the register are just representitives. (Sorry, had a long chat with our lovely registrar about all this. I find it fascinating.)
  • i'm not sure on the tradition, we have asked my step mum and my mums other half to be our witness's. We thought it would be a nice way of really including them on the day.xx
  • scottishbridescottishbride Posts: 2,023
    We are having our CBM and best man but I know a lot of people who had the two mum's - never seen a dad do it but you could have whoever you want. I am sure your dad will understand if you say you want a friend to do it so they are involved. He gets to walk you down the aisle after all!
  • Julia6Julia6 Posts: 1

    As we will both be 61.when we get married and both our parents have sadly passed away we thought we would include our Daughters so we are asking our eldest Daughter on both sides

  • HannyJHannyJ Posts: 31

    We're having my best friend and his best friend, who are best man and bridesmaid. I've never heard of the dad being a witness, but I like the idea of having both the mums- great way to get them involved! 

  • We are having my son and my hubby-to-be's son as they don't have as big a part to play in the ceremony as our daughter's do, who are both bridesmaids.  However, last time I got married I had the Best Man and Chief Bridesmaid.  x

  • We are having h2b's son and a family friend ive known since i was a child.. Now i know i can have 4 though i might ask my mum too!

  • Jenn17Jenn17 Posts: 2

    We are going to ask our mum's to do it, as we felt it was a nice way to involve them. My dad gets to walk me down the aisle, his dad got to walk his sister down the aisle, but the mums (who do so much to help before the day) always seem to be left out on the day.

    I've never heard of dads doing it either, but then again I'd never heard of mums doing it until I looked it up. But it is your day, you should do what you want. Don't pick your dad just because he is expecting it, pick who you want!

  • This thread is from 2007, some comments from 2014

  • I have checked with the Registrar and they have confirmed we can have 4 and they can all sign the register (but 2 is the legal minimum). We are having our 2 siblings, my H2Bs Uncle who is travelling from Singapore to join us and my best friend xx

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