Issues About the Best Man
My H2B wants to ask his best friend to be his best man. She is a woman, but the person he wants to be standing there with him on the day. I totally support his decision and am thrilled that he wants to ask her - I think she will do a fab job. Both H2B and I have a brother each who we want to be ushers, to greet our guests, help with filming parts of the ceremony and to do a speech after H2B and I are pronounced man and wife. Both brothers are really excited about the wedding and can't wait to be all suited up. We haven't asked the best man yet, or asked the ushers about their speech but we are sure they will all be happy. Our problem is that H2B's mum and grandmum think he should be asking his brother and not his friend. We've tried to explain the reasons why : H2B doesn't see his brother as a calming influence, he has always wanted to ask his friend and we do not want my brother to feel excluded. For the same reasons I have chosen my closest friend as MOH rather than one of our sisters. We want them all to be in the wedding aprty, just not in the role that H2Bs mum and grandmum want. I am getting sick of all the interfering (but that is a whole other can of worms). It seems that every time H2B and I decide we really want something, someone is telling us we can't or shouldn't do it that way and telling what we should be doing instead. It is driving me bonkers and I am ready to snap. H2B is confused and upset. His mum has made him feel guilty about not asking his brother, but when he thinks of the wedding, he pictures his friend standing there. Any advice on how to handle this and what we might do to keep everyone happy?!?!?!