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Anyone else NOT having music/dancing?

We will be having a very small wedding in a restaurant, which means we won't be having any music/dancing afterwards. I do love dancing but it would be difficult to arrange logistically in the restaurant and I'm not sure I'd be able to find music to suit all tastes. Is anyone else having a reception without music/dancing, i.e. just a meal and drinks, or am I the only one? image


  • MizzaukMizzauk Posts: 241
    Hi Enchanted mind,

    Well if it makes you feel better i went to my cousins wedding a few weekends ago, they had their wedding in a restaurant, with no music or dancing, but it was still beautiful. The decor and relaxed atmosphere between the guests was lovely. I think a wedding reception without the dancing and music will be fine, you could have some nice background music playing to set the mood you want for the occaision?
  • Thanks, Mizza! A friend of mine had this sort of wedding to and that's what inspired me. H2B and I are really into food and we want it to be the centre of our celebrations. I like the idea of having some nice background music - we hope to have a private dining room, so this should be possible.

    Was just starting to feel like the odd one out with everyone talking about their discos/first dances!
  • sammyjoeuksammyjoeuk Posts: 3,596
    Hi I am having the small problem, my wedding will be with only 12- 20 people and I think I will have background music.x
  • MizzaukMizzauk Posts: 241
    Oh, dont worry about that!

    Most of the weddings I have been to have been the type with out music and dancing, mainly muslim weddings and they tend to be very reserved!

    But my own wedding will be the first big white wedding i will be going to!! So planning has been very difficult. Luckily my h2b is really helpful and organised. We have picked a song for our first dance, but as we both hate being centre of attention we are hoping we only have to dance on our own for about a minute then will ask other couples to join us!

    Have you thought what sort of music you would like playing in the background if you can? I am also intrigued by what food you will be having?!
  • sammyjoeuksammyjoeuk Posts: 3,596
    Sorry the same problem!! Not small, well actually it is a very small wedding!! I could have a big wedding but a small one suits us as a couple! Enchanted, I know you are going to the far east for your wedding, we changed our minds from Hawaii due to the flight times from London, so its possibly going to be New York, now looking at The Waldorf Astoria or St Regis.x
  • mrshelen74mrshelen74 Posts: 9,282
    Hi, im getting married this thursday, and the wedding is only including us 19.

    Also having no music, just background but can bring our own if we want.
  • MollukMolluk Posts: 243
    We are having a small Sunday lunch and all afternoon do and are having lots of fun picking the tracks for our background music. Anyone into music will spot it and enjoy our selections. To everyone else it will just be background
  • Feeling a lot less like the odd one out now, thanks!

    Sidewalk, New York will be AMAZING!! I went there with my parents for Christmas when I was younger and I loved it. The Waldorf Astoria would be fab - will you go for a summer or winter wedding?

    Mizza, I'm really not sure what to do about food yet. We have our eye on an Asian-Mediterranean fusion restaurant in a lighthouse at the top of a hotel (sounds odd, but the views across the bay are amazing and they'd give us rooftop drinks to start!), but I haven't actually tasted their food yet, so we'll see. Originally I fancied an Indian buffet, but our best man and his wife are Chinese and aren't too keen on Indian, so not too sure about that one.

    We'll probably go with H2B's tastes on the background music front, he's a jazz/chill-out man, whereas I tend towards gothic rock - not really what you want while you're enjoying a quiet meal image

    Moll, is your Sunday lunch in a restaurant, too? I'm just wondering how flexible restaurants will be about allowing your own music, although we have a private dining room, so I can't imagine we'd disturb anyone!
  • H2B and I had discussed this issue only the other day. We will only be having 10 - 15 people for the whole thing. I want a beautiful venue for the ceremony and pictures but we had decided that we would either be having a meal at a local restaurant straight afterwards (but only if they can accommodate us in a quiet corner somewhere) or more favourably to us would be to have a tea party type thing at home.

    We are slowly heading toward the second option as it more suits us a couple, to have a buffet and drinks at home where we can relax.

    We will probably just put some background music on through the ipod or something if we are at home or if we do go to a restaurant then most have background music anyway. People mostly talk through the food bits anyway so I wouldnt worry about not having any image
  • sammyjoeuksammyjoeuk Posts: 3,596
    Hi Enchanted sorry, I missed your reponse! My plans have changed, the location I mean! I cannot wait until it is booked! It still going to be around Sept which is cool.Its now the uk, it is still small - which I am glad about! I am still going to just have some back ground music and maybe a quartet type thing.x
  • Our wedding was on 21st July and we had a small do, just 14 in all. Our reception was a meal in a private dining room with background music, my sister in law prepared a number of CDs for us at our request and so they contained all of our favourite songs, with a huge range of music! I was a little worried about no dancing but it truly was the most amazing day of my life. Good luck to all of you x
  • leafyukleafyuk Posts: 2,182
    My friend is having no music (and getting married in a restaurant! Snap!) - just champagne and canapes and mingling on arrival, then a five-course meal (with speeches and cake-cutting in between courses), then throwing the bouquet and leaving for their honeymoon! She says that it doesn't appeal to her to dance, it's uncool and cliched, and the part she has personally found least enjoyable at every other wedding she's been to. Fair enough! Her reasons did make me re-assess my own DJ plans, but 1) H2B is dead set on having a DJ and dancing and going late into the night - it is about the only thing he is adamant about, so fair enough! and 2) without the dancing bit, there's not much for guests to stick around for, and I want my reception to go as long as possible, because every newly-married I know has told me that she wishes her reception had gone on for another hour or two so she could spend mroe time enjoying her wedding day and seeing more of the guests.

    I have been to one wedding where there was no band/dj/dancing, and it was one of the most memorable and loveliest weddngs I've been to, but it did seem to be over very quickly.

    If you don't mind about that aspect, then go for it!!

    P.S. A friend-of-a-friend is having a church ceremony, then a cocktail hour and four-course meal in a marquee, then everyone is going to the nearby beach to let off sky lanterns, and that will be the end of the night! Personally I am quite jealous - sky lanterns sounds better than dancing any day!! image

  • Thanks for your replies girls. Sidewalk, I can't wait to see what venue you're going to go for - my friend had a small wedding in a Cambridge college and it was really lovely!

    Rosyposy, I'm glad to hear that you enjoyed your day - it sounds like just what I'm hoping to achieve.

    I'm not too bothered about the day being over too quickly, we'll probably head to the hotel bar after the meal and enjoy some drinks/meet up with other friends that didn't attend the wedding. Love the idea of a cocktail hour - H2B really wanted a mojito reception, but it's so hot and sticky in Singapore that I'd be worried everyone would be falling over by the time the meal was served!
  • sammyjoeuksammyjoeuk Posts: 3,596
    Enchanted a Mojito hour would be great fun! You could always make sure that they use a tiny amount of rum so no one gets too drunk, because the climate is warm, a nice refreshing drink maybe welcome! It could always be an assortment of cocktails!

    We have a small shortlist so far, Stoke Park Club, Four Seasons in Hampshire and Babbington House, I will let you know what we decide on finally, its been a long journey to just get to this stage!Lol!
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