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Low key marquee July 2019

I'd like to get my ideas down to help relieve my cluttered mind!

Im getting married 6th July 2019 and I wish it was sooner! I would of done it quickly but M wanted to take a year.

We got engaged in May so we have sorted the big things. We are getting married in a registry office (not our local one) which is quite nice and then on to a marquee in my parents field.

I've been married before so initially I wanted everything to be completely different. However I soon realised that I liked everything I chose last time (apart from the groom ๐Ÿ˜‹). People have already said it sounds too much the same but ultimately that's me and my preferences as well as fiancee's! I'm hoping as it was 10 years ago most people won't remember!

I have two children from first marriage ages 10 and 8 and M and I have a 21 month old together.

I would love to spend extraordinary amounts of money but with three children we have to be realistic. Boooo hop. 

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  • Ceremony and Reception Party

    The ceremony is booked for 2.30pm in a lovely registry office in North Wales. My local registry office is not very nice in my opinion. We considered the local town hall but it was about £600 and still not really our tastes. When Prince Harry got married I tried to persuade M to do it in our local church. As I had been married before the church said they would consider it. It too was about £600 and M said it didn't feel right as we aren't really religious. Also it would change the tone of the wedding to be more formal. So he conceded and agreed for the registry office I wanted (where I had married the girls dad because it was nicer ๐Ÿ™ˆ).

    M had said all along he wanted quite a big thing, perhaps to make his family happy. He knew he didn't want a hotel. I said I didn't want it in a place like that either as many weddings seem to have the same feel. Turns out there's a reason for that as it works all without the stress I'm feeling!

    We got a few quotes from some places nearby such as Odd fellows in Chester but they all would eat so much if the budget we decided against it. 

    We agreed on a marquee in my parents field as we could be in control and it would be casual, Boho and "us". 

    Now last time I had the party in the field, we cobbled together gazebos and got the food from Costco. It cost £2000 in total (thank goodness as the divorce cost 1300 ๐Ÿ˜)

    I was pretty shocked when we got our marquee quotes that a £700 tent turns into a £4400 quote! That included things like a generator and toilets. 

     

     

  • Ohh i love a new thread!! Sounds really lovely! 

    I've heard that a marquee can add up when you take into account the loos and stuff, but still worth it to get the vibe you want for the day, and itll still be cheaper! 

  • I got two quotes and went with the company closest to us for ease. We tried to slim the quote down by getting rid of swags and paid our deposit.

    However recently I had a panic that it would look really rubbish and end up costing us loads to decorate ourselves so the swags are back on the list! Father in law is an accountant so even wanted us to try to light it ourselves :-) I also took another look at the drawings and we realised the tables are all crammed in so we have had to request a bigger size marquee. So the quote has gone up about another £850.

    My mum has some ideas to decorate and thinks she is making the bunting....

    I got our initials from hobbycraft and glued flowers on them but I think the look a bit naff now. 

    I'm going to use heart slates as the centre pieces on the tables. 

     

  • Food and drink 

    We've hired a cash bar which is an old caravan that looks really quirky. We will have a drinks package from him but have not sorted it yet. 

    We're having Mexican street food in another van for the main meal. We initially though people could help themselves but the vendor has said they can go up 10 at a time and sort of pre order a few mins before. Again I had a mini panic that it wouldn't work. M had a meeting with them and came away really positive. So we're going to have nachos on the tables to share and a burrito as the main. My poor brother has been roped into making some salads (he is a chef :-))

    We've also put a deposit on a vintage ice-cream van which will be the desert.

    My brothers girlfriend is a great cake maker so she has been asked to make the cake. I love the look of naked cakes but even if it's just her carrot cake I don't mind :-)

    We are thinking of food at 5. 30 and then will get some buffet food from Costco for later on in the evening. 

    I've read a few times on here that people say the night food is a waste so we will be mindful of that. My issue is also we don't have anywhere to warm up stuff or refrigerate it all at this point. 

  • CoffeeDogAddict wrote (see post):

    Ohh i love a new thread!! Sounds really lovely! 

    I've heard that a marquee can add up when you take into account the loos and stuff, but still worth it to get the vibe you want for the day, and itll still be cheaper! 

    Thank you, I read your thread earlier today! I hope it will be. I wish I had a wedding planner to do it all for me! 

  • Party 

    We've hired a dj from 3pm until 12. Probably didn't think the timings through properly as I've never planned a party like this before. With the dj package comes Mr and Mrs Letters, bouncy castle and soft play. Again I didn't think the soft play through as not many little ones will be coming from my initial research!

    We've also got a band for the evening which we are very excited about. We know one of the band members so it feels even more special. We haven't put a deposit on this yet as he said it's not needed eeek. 

    I've researched humanist wedding ceremonies and really like their vibe. My dad is going to do a similar type speach and maybe we can learn handfasting or something! I'm going to keep this bit a surprise from everyone if I can.

     

  • Dress

    I've been on a diet for a few months so lost a stone ideally I would like more (wouldn't we all!). I've tried a few dresses on but though I'd wait until January to look.

    I'm short so I feel it limits me. M only wanted to budget £300 so again I'm limited! Lots of women told him how expensive dresses are and he needed to get real. Whenever I look at dresses I get guilty feelings.

    There's an amazing website and shop I found online called Rock the Frock Bridal which looks fantastic. However no prices on the website signals bad news!

    I've tried a few traditional dresses on from someone that sells old stock and samples. I really didn't feel like me in them.

    Last time (here I go again!) I wore a tea length dress. I really didn't want to go for the same style but again I've come to the conclusion that that's the style that suits me. I've never worn a maxi dress in my life. I've just read someone's post saying the feel so pressured to look amazing on their wedding day. I'm already feeling that pressure now too. My sisters are all tall and thin and I feel competitive for no reason. I found another fabulous dress company called Grace Loves Lace and my sister said oh yes that's where I'd like to get my wedding dress from. That made me want one even more! Totally irrational and I've realised as I said I'm not a tall thin model so will not look good in their dresses. 

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    Last time 10 years ago wearing uggs after taking heels off ๐Ÿ™ˆ

  • Bridesmaids

    How on earth do people chose what the bridesmaids will be in?!!

    Originally I wanted quite alot of them including flower girls. Then we decided on two elder girls. Then my oldest friend was upset and said if I didn't ask her she was turning up dressed as a bridesmaid :-) Then my youngest sister told my mum she was upset I hadn't asked her! So after discussing it with M he agreed I could have the three big ones.

    So I have three adults and my three children. 

    I initially thought I wanted the colour yellow as it would be summer. My eldest daughter has asd traits and is adamant she wanted a yellow dress and that no one is doing her hair :-)

    I'm not sure what the bridesmaid etiquette is in terms of the adults. I don't know if we pay for everything?

    I had a look awhile back and the dress I liked my youngest sister said she didn't. She's young and fashionable so I believed her. 

    I've had a look on Asos today (budget friendly) but it's hard to all agree. Obviously to chose a dress for three people is tricky! They are all taller than me so can wear a long style.

    There's about three that we all like that are low budget and I'm on the cusp of ordering them whilst they are cheap... Only prob it's the tall range and they aren't excessively tall. The one I want to order is the one I liked in the first place that little sis didn't like!

    They are yellow which is what I wanted originally.. 

    This week I ordered the younger girl dresses from Matalan. My mum turned her nose up when I mentioned it. She said I should go to Laura Ashley or somewhere. They didn't have the babies size but I have a lovely dress that used to be little sisters that she can wear! It has yellow daisy's around the waist band so will tie in with the adults dresses. 

  • Budget and hen/stag do's

    We looked at the budget last night and it's currently over forecast. M said the only way to cut costs is the food and drink categories. They are obviously very important so I don't see how we can do that! He's slashed my decorations section to half! We shall see-I've no idea as I've never decorated but I don't think I want lots anyway. Does any one have any tips please?

    Hen do and stag do preparations are underway for June. 

    I am first. I am not a big drinker, mainly because I have the worst hangovers! Initially I liked the idea of going abroad. I talked myself out of it because I am a one night wonder and won't be able to keep up. I asked if I could just go to the city we live in to a local club and everyone said it would be boring! 

    I suggested to my bridesmaid Liverpool and she's now taken over the reigns and keeping everything secret.

    M best man has done the same except he has no idea at all what/where :-) I am slightly dreading what debauchery they will be getting up to-so much so we've had to say to my little sister's boyf and M's brother in law that they don't have to go and can go on like a dad/uncle one instead! 

  • Congrats, I hope you are able to have the dream wedding within your budget :)

    I sent you a DM! 

  • Photography

    I was very shocked with the price of photography. I do appreciate it's a skill and very time costly. I contacted an old friend and was very surprised that the quote was about £1300. I really did want this person as it would fit in with our casual theme but M said no way. After some research I realised that was a pretty standard figure. M thought we could do with out and just get our friends to do it. I read somewhere that good wedding photos are so important and it is something you should definitely splurge on.if you could. M and I eventually compromised and we now have someone coming for 4 hours to do the ceremony and a part of the party for £500. That was a better pill for M to swallow :-) I

  • Candice9Candice9 Posts: 230

    We are spending 2k on the photographers, just because that was our priority-we could have used that on a bar tab or more decorations or just saved it but it was important to us. 

    HOWEVER, we have two covering getting ready to first dance.  The most important bit imo is the ceremony-if you've got that covered you'll have the best bits!!

  • Decorations 


    I spent some time with my mum today and she has lots of great ideas.

    She thinks she can make the bunting..?! Just plain white. She better start now ;-)

    I have a mini shopping list to get. It's very exciting now it all seems real and packages start to arrive (bridesmaid dresses eek).

    On my list are jam jars, slate hearts, battery tea lights, battery fairy light packs and dried rose petals. 

    I left her with some wedding magazines to peruse 

     

  • Hair/Makeup

    When I had initially got engaged I contacted my hairdresser loosely. She said she's do my hair but I'd heard her say before she doesn't really do wedding hair because of potential bridezillas. (I'm paraphrasing!) 

    The more I thought about it the more I thought I had the prerogative to be a bridezilla and that I may not get what I want if I was too scared to ask.

    After a chat my bridesmaids said they were happy to do their hair and make up between themselves, which just left myself. 

    I contacted the local salon 5 mins away from me thinking it would be easier than having to drive into town on the morning of the wedding and stressing me out. They came back to me saying it would be £100.

    £50 for trial and £50 on the day.

    I was shocked but after posting on here it seems about standard. 

    I've decided to proceed as I've mentioned it's convenient. The appointment is at 11am for 90 mins. 

    I've messaged the make up person I'd had pencilled in but no response as yet.

    I cut my hair into a bob a week before I goy engaged! I need it to grow long ASAP now to style it!

     

  • I'm very pale so my mum always told me to wear my hair down to cover my white back!

    At the moment I thinking having it tied up makes me look thinner!

    I'm unsure about styles but originally wanted a Boho outside braid but my dress isn't Boho now.

    My eldest has autistic traits and said that she didn't want a hairdresser doing her hair so that's out the equation. 

     

  • Bridesmaid dresses revisited

    I took the plunge and ordered some yellow adult bridesmaid dresses I'd had my eye on. It's been hard to coordinate passing them over to be tried on. I still don't know if they are any good. 

    I ordered my young girls their dresses from Matalan but the didn't have the baby's size in.

    The were delivered to my home address and the silly pickers had left the security tags on both dresses!

    I was so cross I had to drive to the store with three children and two white dresses. I sent head office an email to let them know and they sent me a £10 voucher as an apology ooops!

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  • Shoes 

    As I mentioned I'd decided on a tea length dress. I knew I needed some shoes that would be a court shoe style nothing with an ankle strap otherwise it would cut my legs off and make me look shorter.

    I began a bidding war on eBay on some second hand Jimmy Choos. Not sure they were really my cup of tea nor that they would be comfy but I liked the idea of having expensive designer shoes. 

    I lost. 

    They went for £102

    I was glad in the end as they'd only be on for an hour or so. 

    In my research I found a brand called Rainbow club. They had loads of lovely shoes to choose from. I chose court shoes with a glitter trim and are advertised for comfort.

    Again doubtful!

    I also ordered some pumps with hearts on for the reception from Asos. 

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  • WINNERS82 wrote (see post):

    Photography

    I was very shocked with the price of photography. I do appreciate it's a skill and very time costly. I contacted an old friend and was very surprised that the quote was about £1300. I really did want this person as it would fit in with our casual theme but M said no way. After some research I realised that was a pretty standard figure. M thought we could do with out and just get our friends to do it. I read somewhere that good wedding photos are so important and it is something you should definitely splurge on.if you could. M and I eventually compromised and we now have someone coming for 4 hours to do the ceremony and a part of the party for £500. That was a better pill for M to swallow :-) I

    I definitely would not skim on photographer - photos are the only thing that you get to look at after the wedding! 

  • Cupcakes2019 wrote (see post):
    WINNERS82 wrote (see post):

    Photography

    I was very shocked with the price of photography. I do appreciate it's a skill and very time costly. I contacted an old friend and was very surprised that the quote was about £1300. I really did want this person as it would fit in with our casual theme but M said no way. After some research I realised that was a pretty standard figure. M thought we could do with out and just get our friends to do it. I read somewhere that good wedding photos are so important and it is something you should definitely splurge on.if you could. M and I eventually compromised and we now have someone coming for 4 hours to do the ceremony and a part of the party for £500. That was a better pill for M to swallow :-) I

    I definitely would not skim on photographer - photos are the only thing that you get to look at after the wedding! 

    This person was recommended a few times on my local FB page. We had a a meeting and looked at her portfolio so seems good. Hopefully ha. 

  • This sounds quite similar to my wedding. Also, I LOVE rock the frock dresses. I found one of their designers dresses on ebay so might be worth looking there. 

  • kate268 wrote (see post):

    This sounds quite similar to my wedding. Also, I LOVE rock the frock dresses. I found one of their designers dresses on ebay so might be worth looking there. 

    Oh lovely ill take a look thanks! 

  • Urgh the yellow bridesmaid dresses are far too long. 

    Back to the drawing board. Literally don't know where to start. I want cheap ones so thought I'd got a bargain with these sale Asos ones. The regular length ones are £85 each.

    I've found a nice grey one on Misguided but not sure if the material will look cheap. 

     

     

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  • Sian91Sian91 Posts: 829 New bride

    I would order and see- Missguided varies massively! Love the colour of those :)

     

  • Sian91 wrote (see post):

    I would order and see- Missguided varies massively! Love the colour of those :)

     

    Thanks-I did too! However the material was not impressive and one bridesmaid didn't like the fit. I'll have to send them back. These dresses will be the death of me! 

  • Have you looked at chi chi or little mistress? There are lots of choose from and they are well priced!

  • image

    Third lot of dresses arrived and one maid has tried it on. We were all pleased and think the embroidery is beautiful on this. 

    M and I sat up last night going through songs we'd like DJ to play and decided we'd have the last two hours as an "indie disco"! 

     

     

  • Nothing much to report. 

    Two weddings have happened recently and one has disturbed my emotions! One friend lives in Oz and eloped. I suddenly feel sad that my wedding will be a bit prescribed. Totally irrational and M reminded me it's not a competition...
    My sister was a bridesmaid at the other wedding. Completely different time of the year to mine, but she had giant stars instead of bunting hung up on the marquee which I might steal the idea of.

    Looking at both brides I tried my dress on yesterday and don't feel happy. I'm still overweight and felt like a fat pie in it. I maintained today at my SW weigh in so that's not helped!

    I made my 8 year old take loads of pictures of me in it. I had her ballet tiara on too as I have no idea how to do my hair!?!

    I'm going to borrow a veil at the weekend to try.

    I also want to get some costume wedding jewellery but don't know where to start. If anyone has recommendations please?
  • MrsCToBeeMrsCToBee Posts: 2,544 New bride
    I'm sure you look fab.
    I bought my wedding jewellery from the QVC Diamonique range randomly!
  • MrsCToBee said:
    I'm sure you look fab.
    I bought my wedding jewellery from the QVC Diamonique range randomly!
    Can you send me the links please ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ™
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