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Dad not going to be there...

Hi Ladies,

To cut a long, long story short my family are VERY religious and at the moment I'm living in sin, i left home 4 years ago (I'm 23 now) and went to live with H2B. When i left mum told me if i walked out the door I'd 'be dead to her'. They've told me that I'm living with the 'devil and living in sin'. Recently we've been talking a bit more and they say everything will be change after we're married etc. I'm not happy that it'll all suddenly change after years of being preached too and yelled at etc and for H2B being treated like he has done.

I knew that they wouldn't come to the wedding but I was holding out hope for my brother to come, I get on really well with him and he gets on with H2B but yesterday he said that he won't be coming to Rhodes because he doesn't want to 'rock the boat' with my parents. H2B went crazy, i just sat there and cried - every little girl dreams of her daddy giving her away or at least her brother. H2B have decided that one of our best friends will walk me down the aisle now but it really hurts and H2B thinks that I'll be unhappy on the day...I won't be, i just hurts deep down.

Sorry to go on, it helps getting off my chest.


  • Hey Amy,

    I am so sorry to hear what's going on with your family. I can't really say anything to help cause all I want to do is speak to your mum and dad! Unfortunately in life parents can take you by surprise. I have nothing but admiration for you for actually walking out and living your life. That took a lot of guts and don't you forget it. You're a strong young lady and if your family don't want to be there then I think it is them that will have regrets and not you. Stay strong and keep smiling.

  • Hi Amy,

    I dont have much to add other than I think this is such a sad situation. I can never understand how people let religious beliefs come between them and their loved ones. I appreciate that they are allowed their beleifs and that we should respect that but why cant they just tell you

    Any how I just wanted to say that I agree totally with Decsilver in that you have been amazingly strong over this and made your choices based on whats right for you and now whats right for you and H2b - keep doing this you have done nothing wrong and I am quite sure that in years to come it will be your parents who have regrets on the fact that they missed out on a major event in their daughters life. It is also sad that your brother doesnt feel he can make his own choices but do try and remember what it ws like for you at home sometimes it is easier not to rock the boat when you feel you have nowhere to run too. I am not saying that his choice is right but just that its understandable so try not to judge him too harshly.

    Good luck hun xxx
  • Not sure what happened there but it ate a bit of my post????

    End of first paragraph was supposed to read.....

    "But why cant they just tell you how they feel and then respect your choices rather than fall out"

    Stupid website image
  • Hi Amy,

    I don't really have any advice for you but I do want you to know that I know how you feel. I have had many problems with my parents and my h2b its all kindof ok just now but we are not living together I think you are strong. We live appart if only to keep the peace. I live alone and I get so down sometimes I get lonely at night and when I have to make dinner for one etc but I try to just think about my future and hope it will all work out!

    my email address is [email protected] if you ever need to talk I can share my experience! BTW I am also close to your age 24 so don't feel alone!

  • Hi Amy, I know how you feel. My parents are really odd. I was living with h2b and my parents aren't really religious (they only started attending church when my Dad and step-mum had to get their banns read and they moan at me for getting involved in the church) but they complained that it was wrong living together without being engaged (they had to say that as they lived together before marrying). When we got engaged my parents complained and now my Dad is refusing to talk about the wedding so I'm expecting to walk solo.

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