doubts over venue choice


hmmm i just need constructive advice or opinions really.

when we started searching for venues we had two things in mind - cost and my sister.

my oldest sister has multiple sclerosis and so mobility is an issue. she uses a mobility scooter and can only walk for short distances ie 5 steps at a time and needs a lot of support to do this. so we needed a venue that was disabled friendly. she is also a bit fearful really of going out so prefers to stay in or not travel far even though she prob could travel to be honest - for that reasons shes never been to our house as its an hour and half away.

it is really important to me she attends so we booked church and hotel only 20 minutes from her and said we would get her a room so she sleep during day if she needs to etc.

however, now she is saying she cant stay over as she cant leave her dog. and im raelly worried after picking a venue soley to suit her she wont come.... i would really love to get married in london but when i mentioned it to her i could tell by her face even if it was disabled friendly she wouldnt travel there - silly as its only 40 minutes from her and her hubbie is a london cab driver but i tthink its psychological with her.

its still really important to me that she attends and finds it easy to go but i am really gutted to not be marrying in london as thats where me and mark met and have so many memories there...

do you think we should just stick with our current venue or look at changing?


  • doorstopperdoorstopper Posts: 1,674
    Sorry about your sister - H2B's aunt had MS and it's horrible image

    It sounds to me like she's worried about hurting you by saying she doesn't want to come - I'm sure it wouldn't be difficult for her to find somebody to look after the dog for an evening. Could you sit with her and have an honest chat? You obviously understand that it's going to be difficult for her, so you might just need to reassure her that everything will be made as easy and as comfortable as possible for her, and that it means so much to you for her to be there.

    If she's still reluctant, I'd then look at changing the venue, but only once you've confirmed that she definitely won't be coming.
  • door stopper is right! you should get married where u want, BUT it obviously wont be the same if your sister isnt there. If you say its phsycological, do you think she could over come her worries since its for something very important? Or helping her think of someone she could trust to ask them to watch her dog would probably give her great piece of mind! Im sure it means a hell of a lot to her that you've decided on your venue based on what makes it easier for her tho! a very sweet thing to do image
  • nats2013nats2013 Posts: 6,253
    talk to her, especially about the dog issue because i have dogs and it sounds silly to those who dont but they are always the for-front of your mind when planning anything (our whole wedding is planned around our dogs). do you know her dog walking friends or if she has a dog walker could they take the dog over night?

    in terms of a london wedding id be temted to have the wedding you really want, you may only do it once so you want it to be everything you want but what is more important-honestly-it's ok to say the venue you know but if it's your sister then make the venue you have as amazing as anything, do it london themed??? (not in a taky way of course)

    good luck!
  • You could have your wedding inLondon and your sister could just be there for the cermony? So she is there to see you wed and in the photos and she will be home early enough to be with her dogs. I can understand that to do the whole day must be quite scary for her and she's probably quite frightened being away from home. Xx
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