grrr!!

Just need to rant! 

we are getting married in cuba 2015...so this evening, i asked H2B sister to be bridesmaid...got a little card for her, gave it to her and all i got was thats a nice card!!

 

i am so upset!! she always seems jealous of me and never happy for me! even when we got engaged you could tell she really didnt want to say congrats!! 

i know i asked really far in advance but obviously wanted to give her enough notice to save etc! when we mentioned before that we were going to get married abroad she said  oh i dont no if ill be able to come! im not being rude or anything but there is no reason as to why she wouldnt be able to come! she works full time and still lives at home...has pretty much nothing to pay out for! i think she is just trying to be awkward!

if i was asked to be bridesmaid i would be so happy and not just say "nice card!" 

ARGHHHHH!! make me wish i didnt ask her! and asked someone who would be more grateful!! but if i didnt ask her then she probably would have kicked off like always!!

 

am i just being really silly?!!!

Posts

  • Everyone needs a rant now and then weddings are stressful. She will probably get more excited nearer the time when she has her dress and the flights are booked. It takes time for siblings to adjust to such a big thing sometimes but I'm sure she'll come around and you'll have a lovely wedding image
  • PopsyxxPopsyxx Posts: 1,009
    Thank you xx
  • Bb5Bb5 Posts: 275

    Are you paying for anything for her? Or is she expected to pay for flights, hotel etc... Because tbh if someone asked me to be bridesmaid yes i would be happy but i would not be happy to have it expected of me to pay out hundrads of pounds.

    The fact that she works and lives at home is irrelevent and for all you know she could be saving for her own place, paying off debts etc.. and even if she's not its not your place to dictate how she spends her money. I wouldn't be exited in that situation either, yes being bridesmaid is lovely but you shouldn't have to pay through the nose just because thats what the bride wants.

    If i have it wrong and you are paying for flights/hotel etc than i apolagise but thats not the impression i got from the OP.

  • I have said this before and I'll say it again, I would never attend a far away destination- even if it was my own sisters. A holiday to Cuba would literally cost a few thousand pounds and whilst it maybe possible to save that I wouldnt want it to be dictated to me that I had to save that, had to spend it on X and use my holiday leave for it. If my sister did the same all I would feel is resentment over the money- and it would overshadow any excitement I had for it- in fact I'd probably forget to say congrats with that sort of bombshell!

    If you are paying for her to attend then apologies and she should be more greatful but  otherwise I can understand a lack of enthusiasm

    Also I think as excitable brides to be we forget that it's not that exciting for other people!

  • She sounds like a bitch!
  • Does she have a partner or someone to bring? If you are paying for her and she has no parther then perhaps its the thought of a holiday for a wedding, captive with the family as it were thats not thrilling her! To her this is a holiday as the wedding is a day, shes going to be there at least a week. She may feel like she's got a week or 2 of romance in her face and no one herself, or could her other half not afford to come? On the other hand, if you arent able to pay for her it could be that. I have been a bridesmaid myself abroad, and while I was thrilled to be asked (I am very excitable!) the thought of having to save the money, (and that if I falterd it wasnt me I was letting down it was my friend) and get my boyfriend at the time to agree to save for someone elses day filled me with dread. Then there's spends, and if shes not been away for a while holiday clothes. I was living at home at the time but like MrsAWatkinson says, this is irrelevant. Most people live to their means, some beyond, and how people spend their money is their own business. But if like you say, shes always been jealous, and if you are able to pay or contribute to the trip and she has a partner or friend to bring then no you're not being silly! My wedding and all the mini dramas are stressing me out MASSIVELY but again like LittleRed says we forget that our weddings arent as exciting or important to everyone else! I hope she comes round and I able to go for you, good Luck!! xx

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