Totally deversated :-( dads not coming to wedding

I get married in two months and found out today that my dad won't be coming to the wedding . My mum and dad are still together but my dad works away and says he won't be home for the wedding. He's known about this over a year and has only told me today though my mum. I think my mum loves it as she loves to think something isn't as I wanted. I rely on mum for childcare etc so I can't even get mad! She's not even bothered by the fact. I'm so upset I can't believe my dad doesn't even care he won't be there , all they can say is why didn't you just go away and do it ? Why are you doing it anyway ?? And how she hates occasions! Well I do it because I love my man and the wedding I am having is the wedding I want .

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  • Hi hun, couldn't read and run so had to comment!

    I can't believe your dad isn't coming image what sort of relationship do you have with him-cant you phone him!?  Your mum doesn't sound all that supportive (sorry!) if she is happy with that decision.  I feel really sorry for you.  What does h2b think? xx

  • He doesn't know yet as he's at work image

    I thought we was a close family , my dads always worked away so used to that but never thought he would do this. I can email him but I did to ask if he was coming and I actually heard though my mum and sister as he never replied . image



    No mum isn't , she just moans all the time about anything that she doesn't want or like ! X



    I want to cry and cry I want to scream I feel like calling it all off as now I'm totally embarrassed by the fact my dad can't even say he's taking a few days off!
  • Hi Hollie, I feel so sorry for you this is really sad.

    Have you spoken to your dad in person? Maybe a face to face chat however painful might be the best way to solve it.

    What does your H2B think?

    Sending hugs x

  • Oh hun!

    Don't call it off!  If anything it should be your Dad that should feel embarrassed that he isn't making the effort to come!!  What does your sister think?  xx

  • MrsA6MrsA6 Posts: 962 New bride

    So sorry for you hun, how awful for you image 

    My mum and dad have been separated since for 25 years (not the best of friends), and i'm not super close to my dad (it can be a strained relationship at the best of times) but there was no question he would be there on my wedding day.

    I cant believe that your dad cant arrange to be at home for 1 day - i hate to say it but it seems that if he really wanted to be there, he would find a way. And how hurtful that you aren't getting the support you need from your mum image

    Right now it will seem like the worse thing that could have happened, but as you said, you love your man, and you must remember the reason you are having you wedding in the first place, its for you and your h2b. If your family cant support you, they are the ones who will lose out *hugs*

  • He works in china so makes talking or popping home hard. My sister is awful

    To me and will be loving this! They haven't helped out at all even a offer too!! I'm so angry ! My partners family aren't coming and we have nothing to do with them from things that happened even before we was together .



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  • Hi Holliepop, I'm so sorry to read this, it must be breaking your heart.  I agree with the ladies above if at all possible do try and speak or write a letter to your Dad explaining what it means to you that he is part of your day.  He may not realise how important it is to you (parents can think the strangest things - mine asked who was giving me away - I had to say that I was hoping my dad would!).

    Lots of hugs to you and let us know how you get on xxx

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