Where to begin..
My son and his fiance have been together for seven years, got engaged last year and started planning their wedding.
We were told they wanted both sets of parents equally involved.
Her parents took them to see several venues without our knowledge & unbeknown to us, steered them toward one in particular however In looking up something on the net, I happened to spot an advertisement for a venue which I though may be of interest to them based on the ideas they had and one which they may like to view......their decision/choice.
Out of the blue I received a really nasty phone call from her "mother" asking me to told me to do anything and said it was nothing to do with me/us as it was "her" day!! Together with many other nasty things. I don't believe her husband was aware because he would have been horrified.
Having kept their daughter for two and a half years rent free and without even so much as one call to say thank you in all of that period to receive a totally unwarranted call like that...well...
it appears she then, whilst owning up to her husband, lied to cover her embarrassment over her pathetic behaviour.
My son and his fiance were so angry that hey told her and reiterated that they wanted both sets of parents to be equally involved in the wedding and its planning. My sons fiance apologised on behalf of her mother and stated it wasn't what they wanted, which I accepted.
I said all would be forgiven but all I would ask, as I only have sons, please could I be included and go wedding dress shopping with them, not necessarily to be there when she chose her dress, but just to be a part of the fun and she actually promised saying that I could. I was so looking forward to the event and having the chance to actually be apart if this momentous task. However it never happened a she burst in the door one day all excited announcing she'd bought her wedding dress!!!
I was so hurt and upset...
She said she didn't want he mother and me to argue, when I pointed out that it wasn't me that had either started or argued, she then said she didn't want anyone else to see which would have been fine if it had just been he and her mother, but she took an aunt as well. Said that it wasn't planned although my son at the same time of her denial said "I told ... she hold ask you a well".
Her parents have been to chose the band and other things with them....we have not been included in anything and know nothing....
Her mother did say it was "her day", caused all the issue, problems and yet we're the ones taking the punishment!
We were planning to pay half but under the circumstance as its "her day" they can blessed well pay for he privilege.
I am so, so hurt by it all that I can't stop crying, my husband is no longer interested in any of it and neither of us wants to go.
From like to tolerate has now become hate toward his fiancé but he stands by them and with them watching how they are acting toward us.
We have given our son everything we possibly could, going without to give him the best education....money toward the house, you name it.... Don't get me wrong, I did it out of love for him but in return, not that I want his eternal gratitude; just a bit of love and respect as his mother; not a spit in the face like we're getting....
I went through he'll with parents on the occasion of my wedding day, so was very conscious and determined not to interfere, or put any opinion across...after all, it is their day and they should be able to have and enjoy it the way that they want.
In addition, I've already been told both mothers will not be invited to the "hen do" as they will be going nightclubbing. She's planning, or so my son says, to do something for us mothers and the older generation ladies.... For what she and her mother has done and the horrible, nasty, atmosphere they've created, I don't wish to be involved or have anything to do with it. In fact, the only party I would wish to attend would be her leaving party.
Plus and I know it sounds very vindictive, I don't care what the hell she'll look like as no matter how hard one tries, you cannot make a silk purse out of a sows ear, and again for all I care she can turn up in a black bin liner!!!
I am not and will not be gaining a "daughter-in-law" as it appears I've already lost my son!!
Neither my husband or I wish to attend the wedding, perhaps the money we would have spent n attending the day would be best spent on going on a blessed good holiday and to hell with them both???
Still crying whilst I write this so heavens knows how many mistakes I've made or even if it make sense ?