bridesmaid issue....stressing

Hello all

Would love advice from you....I have my two sisters and my best friend as b/maids. I have another friend who I have known for 20years that I haven't asked reason being we have had a lot of issue in the last year or more where we just haven't connected as close friends and its never been quite right. she had a baby in January and due to this I didn't think to really ask her ether as I thought this would take up her time and to be honest it hadn't been planned....

we went on our first night out since baby was born and she brought up the issue that why she hadn't been asked and she was upset by this, the most uncomfortable moment ever. I explained I felt our relationship had become distant and to be honest just felt was right time to ask with her having baby etc. she then said to another friend later in the night that she thinks she is a bridesmaid now.....I don't know what to do my sister and friend said I shouldn't ask and If I had wanted her to be I would have asked her with the rest I don't want to upset anyone but I do feel our relationship as friends has changed but at same time I don't want to hurt her what do I do or say!?


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  • JbeeJbee Posts: 60

    Just say you think she might be very busy with the baby.  And said that you have a lot of expectation from your bridesmaid, for her being a mum you just don't want to put so much pressure on her.  Ask her if she can do a reading or be a witness instead at your wedding that should solve the issue!

  • mrsL15mrsL15 Posts: 48

    yeah ive asked her to do a reading she said no and she would be too nervous lol suppose you cant win really just don't want to stress over something like this x

  • KK12KK12 Posts: 927

    It all depends on you MrsL15, did you ever think of asking her to be your bridesmaid? If not, there's your answer - you are right in thinking that bridesmaids with young babies will have a lot of their time taken up with them (unless the baby will be looked after all day by someone else) and some of the tasks that you might ask her to do as bridesmaid, she will be unable to do with a toddler in tow - you could wait and see if you get close again as friends as you still have a year to go to your wedding but try not to stress about it! x

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