Another bridesmaid dilemma!
I know this is a common dilemma, but I'm currently having issues (mostly with myself!) about my bridesmaids.
We got engaged recently and I'm not the type of person who has their wedding all planned out. All I really knew is I didn't want a big bridal party. I have 3 cousins I am close to, 2 best friends who have been like sisters for the past 10 years and my sister. My H2B also has a sister. To keep things simple, I discussed the issues of numbers getting too big and told him I'd really only like my sister as a bridesmaid as it would mean a lot to her and me. I decided to make the others VIPs, i.e. They were bridesmaids in all but name, could come to dress fittings, wedding fayres, make invites etc, they just wouldn't all wear the same dress and walk up the aisle.
My cousins and best friends were fine with this. Future SIL and MIL were not. Lots of tears ensued and my H2B and I discussed. I said if it was important TO HIM, not his sister and mum, I would make her a bridesmaid, but he said no, it should be my choice. I said SIL can do a reading, be a witness, anything she would like to do. Phoned both MIL and SIL to explain situation and thought that was the end of it as they were both fine with the whole VIP situation.
Last night H2B got very upset. It turns out he thinks he hasn't thought it through properly and he would like his sister to be a bridesmaid, as he feels it's important for her to be involved in that way. Immediately I said of course, if he would like her to be a bridesmaid, she can be.
I have not slept. I know that is stupid, I am angry at myself for it. I keep rolling around very silly issues for example; I now have to tell my sister she is not the only bridesmaid, do I upset my cousins and best friends and tell them SIL has now been 'bumped up', do I make them all bridesmaids regardless of my desire for small bridal party, where do I find a dress that will complement my tall, broad shouldered sister and his tiny, ballet dancer sister, do I now have to change my plans of finding cheaper dresses as SIL is very fashion savvy? I do get on with future SIL well, it's just that we've only met a few times, the rest of the girls have been there for me for at least 10 years and I see very regularly.
Please tell me if I am being ridiculous and stupid, I will not be offended. I am not a girly girl and just don't see what the big deal is with walking down an aisle and wearing a matching dress!!