Kids at weddings?
My mum has been a total mumzilla throughout the wedding process, i.e. I'm going to ruin her day, it will look cheap, the men should be in tails and will look stupid in suits, she will be embarrassed in front of her friends, I've not involved her enough etc - the usual mumzilla rants! We've spoken about this and have had a fragile peace for the last few days, as lately there seems to be an issue every week! But yesterday it blew up. We have discussed the 'no kids rule' and my parents have said no kids but we want a few as my fiance has a nephew who is 10 months, my cousins 2 kids are 16 months and 3 weeks, and my friends kids are 3 years old and 10 months. The 3 year old is our page boy and we are god parents to both the 10 month old babies. So although we are not inviting kids to the reception we wanted these kids here with us to be married as we are close to them and they are family/god children and they are to be picked up after the church service at 2.30. I was at my mums yesterday when my cousin dropped round his RSVP with the kids names on the reply. Mum went nuts saying they said no kids and this was going to ruin everything and walked away. Last night she kept texting me saying how hurt she was and how sneaky I am inviting them. I told her I honestly thought i was ok - their names had been down on the guest list all along (that she has seen) she kept saying 'tell me honestly how many kids you have invited, you knew our feelings and Im beside myself with hurt' etc. She knew about our page boy and she said yesterday that the fiances nephew was ok so her real issue is with my cousins kids. She didnt invite kids to her wedding and this offended my cousins mum (my dads side of the family) so they didn't speak for years. My cousins parents live in spain and my cousins wife only has her elderly mother and father to babysit the kids so I know they only have 1 babysitter locally who cant look after both kids as 2 are a handful and they are very family centered and I knew they would be upset if we didnt invite their kids. So I do want them there but I feel like if I didnt invite them there would be a problem with a)their feelings and b)babysitting so I invited them as it didnt matter to me that much to cause problems by not inviting them. And now theres a bigger problem that they are invited with my mum! Not sure what to do now - I texted my cousin last night about getting their kids picked up after the service and they said her mum couldnt look after both the kids so they may bring the baby who will be 10 weeks with them for the day - so this would have been an issue all along. Now that wont really affect my day or it shouldnt affect my mums so I cant see what the problem is really? And if any of the kids cry the parents will take them outside, not a big deal! Not sure how me and my parents are going to come back from this. I keep disappointing them as they want to recreate their day is seems - ie no kids, men in tails etc and my ideas and wants are getting in their way of this ideal. Cant wait for it to be over at this stage as they have caused me nothing but stress, which is not the way I should be feeling 7 weeks before but they keep imposing strict rules I knew nothing about until after Ive done something and its too late