Church Wedding Crisis

Hey lovely ladies

Hope anyone out there could give me any advice/help about my current situation. I recently go engaged on may 19 of this year 2014 and its been about 2 months since we've been planning our wedding and the first thing we dealing with right now is the venue and the church. However, we are indeed going through some crisis right now and is in major stressed because we have just found our perfect venue and the perfect date which would the 8th August next year. However, since the church we plan to marry is will be outside of my local area about an hours away we were asked by the priest in which we plan to marry to get a written permission from out local church where we live in order for us to be allowed to marry in the church we wanted to.

Now we have all the necessary documents needed to marry in that church however, the permission is another story. Since me and my partner do not often attend church due to work circumstances and we only go as often as we can, this church is the only church we attend and having spoken to the local priest he has now told us since we don't attend church on regular basis and hes never seen us, this church apparently is not our local parish. I was so upset by this because I thought everything was being sorted and now turns out our local parish here wont give us permission because he doesn't know us although were of local residence and we have attended the church on numerous occasions. 

Im so worried since our venue is slowly occupying and im sure they cant wait for us. What shall i do, I know the only option is probably to start attending church but how long will that take? image hope someone can give me advice or any help with this image


  • JulyBugJulyBug Posts: 420

    Can you book the venue and not the church yet or are they connected? If you can book the venue then I'd go ahead and do it - if that particular church falls through then you can just go to another one - not ideal but usually okay. I'm surprised they won't let you book - we've provisionally booked our church and will get all the paperwork to them but haven't had to do it that beforehand. Maybe go and check if that's a possibility?

    Then start going to church - register with the office if there is one so you're on the mailing list etc. Go every week and make sure the priest sees you! If there is another church in your parish then maybe start going there - it sounds like you're on a negative footing with the priest at that church so it might take a bit longer - go to a new one and say you've lapsed going to church but you're starting now because you're getting married and you'd like to get married in the faith as that's important to you etc. Best of luck!

  • When is your wedding planned for? We are getting married in a church that is about 40 mins from where we live. We have promised the vicar that we will attend a church service there once per month for the 6 months prior to our wedding. In return, he will allow us to be registered on the electoral role for the parish, which means that we can get married in his parish.

    Basically if you don't have any links to the parish and it isn't the closest church to your house, you need to get on the electoral role by regularly attending services at that church. What is termed as 'regular attendance' will be up to your vicar......Good luck image

  • @JulyBug- Thank you so much for the reply, I was also thinking to book the venue too because the church where I want to get married with had already said that the 8th 2015 August is available and has put me down for the 2pm service. Im not entirely sure if thats a final decision but I did ask him if I could book a deposit for the venue but he still wants me to get a permission from my local parish. Do you think I could still go ahead withe venue in regards to the date being available at the church. I feel like I should just consider this and basically change my local parish here if ever. I mean all I need is a permission and to attend church and all should be okay. I will find another local church here if this one doesnt pull through but I think I can still attend this church and just see the priest and hopefully everything will go well. Thank you so much for your replies and really appreciate it xx

  • @Loveweddings2- Thank you so much for your reply hun and you have just given me a wonderul Idea. I guess its just about having good communication with the priests. I could actually speak to the priest in the parish I want to get married to and ask if we can attend the church even twice a month since my parents live in the area anyway and I could just attend every time I come down to visit my parents. 

    The Church which is suppose to be my local parish is just about 5 minutes away from where I live here in my local area. I didnt understand what you man by electoral role in the church, is that for the area of actual church. Because I am on the electoral role  in my area. I could try other churchs around my area however they may be slightly a distance from where I live which is why Im slightly confused when the priest at my church said were not a member of the parish. I hope I could find a solution soon. Thanks for your help though. Was super useful xxx On and my wedding plan should be on the 8th August 2015 next year and my main concern is the venue. However, the chruch where I want to marry has actually put me down for the date I want which is great I think all he wants is just the permission and wants me to wait to get that before booking venue. But Im considering booking the venue because he did already say it was available. Do you think that might be taking a risk lol image

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