6 weeks to go and I am cracking up

6 weeks till my wedding in November and up to now I've managed to just about hold it all together apart from stressing about money and whether I've planned enough stuff.

But in the last couple of weeks its started to get really stressful. Starting with RSVPs, I had no idea it would be such an effort to get people to return these. And even close friends wouldn't acknowledge that they had at least received it. I hand made our invitations, so needless to say a lot of time and effort went into them, just hurts a little bit.

On top of that I am completely frustrated with the coordinators at our venue. I feel like I have to chase them all the time and it has made me feel like our wedding is a really low priority for them. I get it they are a hotel and they must do over 100 weddings a year. Our day is no different. And as our wedding is smallish they are probably not making as much as they might. But that doesn't mean that its not important to me! I am now on my 3rd different contact there, they constantly give the wrong information without apology and its making me so anxious that things will go wrong on the day.

Also, a problem I am sure many can relate to, I have not lost nearly as much weight as I would like to. and you would think with my wedding date looming that I would be 100% on my diet and exercising like a demon but its the reverse all the stress is making me eat and drink more than I normally would. 

I realise this is a complete indulgent whiney list but I have had such a ball in my chest about all this the last couple of days. I just needed somewhere to vent.

Posts

  • MrsF14MrsF14 Posts: 131

    This couldve been written by me! Sorry to hear you're having a stressful time, I think it's pretty normal and everyone goes through it-well that's what I'm telling myself.

    i get married in 3weeks and despite sending an email to my venue last week with table plans ect I had to chase them today as I had heard nothing from them! My car company went is moving house and will "get back to me when they're settled" to go over everything!

    i think the RSVP thing is standard too, I was chasing my inlaws to be, 2days after the date we had asked for them back.

    i thought I was coping pretty well but woke up today with 2coldsores so have had to factor in a mad dash to the dr to get stuff to stop them taking over my face!

     

    Hang on in there it will get easier and your day will be fab! x

  • Aww try not to get too stressed xx

    RSVPs: have you asked your guests if they have received the invites. Might be an idea to give them a little nudge and just explain that the venue need final numbers and you need to start sorting our your table plan (if you are having one). I am making all of my invites so know how much effort goes in to them and I am so proud of them I think i would be gutted if I didn't get recognition lol

    Venue: Arrange a meeting with them and go armed with a list of questions that you need answering. regardless of how much your wedding is costing they agreed to let you have your wedding there so your wedding should be treated with just as much care as someone paying £100,000.

    Weight: My dress is currently too small and like you I eat and drink when I am stressed. Have you tried slimming world. You still have 6 weeks and you can lose a lot on that plan xx Try and be strict with your diet and drink plenty of water. If you need any tips on what to eat just send me a message and I will help if I can xx

  • Thank you so much Miss2Mrs14 and the littleangel.

    After venting on here on Friday and reading your responses it brought me back down to earth. Everyone goes through the same thing. Had a very productive day yesterday and am feeling massively back on track.

    Miss2Mrs14 congratulations on your wedding in 3 weeks!! Good to hear my venue is not the only one that seems to be unresponsive. 

    thelittleangel have now arranged a meeting with my hotel to run through everything. I am currently on the Slimming World plan, have just had a few crappy weeks. 

    Now have 12 days to the 2nd hen do so am going to be good till then and that will be my last day off plan until the wedding.. afternoon tea and bar in the evening - so will be very off plan!

    xx

  • Ems2905Ems2905 Posts: 144

    I am getting married in 25 days and at the 6 week mark I had a little breakdown as well.   Got so worried about every single aspect, started to hate my dress, regret not losing weight, worry about not having enough decorations and stressing about not finishing my DIY projects.   I literally was shaking and feeling sick from worry!!  But a couple of days later, after a very productive crafting day, I am 100% back on track.  I think this is totally normal and I think a good productive day can really help you get focused and happy again xx

  • I got married in August and trust me having a mini freak out with a couple of weeks to go is totally normal no matter what it is about! I was so calm in the lead up to my day then about 4 weeks before hand I felt like I didn't have enough time to do everything etc but yes the RSVP thing I think is something that becomes an issue for most brides, I was still chasing people right up until the day I sent the info off for my table plan to be made! I know it's easier said than done but try to keep as chilled out about it as possible the lead up is so lovely if you can and the big day will be here before you know it image xx

  • RSVP'ing is one of the most ridiculously stressful things!  I had to get my mum to chase members of my family who hadn't bothered to reply.  It's something I do straight away now when I receive an invite for something.

    Well done for sorting out a meeting with your venue, that's what I would have tried to do.  We're in a fortunate position in that we haven't really needed to chase anyone and if anything it's the other way round!  Even though we have been passed around once or twice with co-ordinators at our venue each one has always known every detail of our wedding.  You should ask your current contact if they will be there on the day or if it will be one of the others.

    Good luck with everything and don't beat yourself up for overeating/drinking. A lot of us do the same during stressful situations and planning a wedding is definitely one of them! xx

  • Thank you again everyone who responded. Did me good to vent and not go home and loose it in front of the H2B.

    Feeling so much better now, spoke to a few friends who recently got married and they also had a mini breakdown 4-6 weeks before.

    Now forcing myself to enjoy some of this process. Its been such a long time in the making and I know it will go so fast.

    Also now I can really look forward to the honeymoon, as its so close, but I keep forgetting about it because of the wedding!

  • RicRic Posts: 1

    Im a groom getting married on the 15th November, but unfortunately me and my wife2b are getting really stressed. I have just been crying in the work toilet, i just think it's all going to go so wrong. I have not had all the rsvp either. And i still have to pay £1000 before Friday. Agggghhhh, and my belly is getting bigger by the day.

    Now its come to a stage where me and Chelle are arguing, snapping at eachother.

  • Oh Ric I'm sorry to hear that. I think the problem it is the closer it gets the nerves start to set in as the same time that you need to finish off loads of prep and of course all of the bill start needing paying. No wonder it feels like the most stressful part!!

    After having a major stress out this weekend I have made a conscious choice to not even talk about the wedding for a few evenings at home and remembering that we had other things to talk about before we started planning!!

    I'm sure it will calm down, its only a few weeks to go and soon everything will be sorted and you can just get excited

     

  • k8l12k8l12 Posts: 254

    I compltely sympathise with the RSVP situation, we said 13th October and has still had less than half back by then. Last Saturday i went on a rampage ringing everybody to check they are coming and they were all just like yes of course we are we thought you knew (as if i am a mind reader). Seems like a physical written RSVP is becoming a thing of the past!

    My fiance is so super calm its driving me crazy, while i am running around stressing (mostly about his family) and trying to get everything finished!

    Everybody keeps telling me it will all be worth it in the end image

  • My invites aren't out yet, looks like the RSVP's are going to be a nightmare.  planning to give them RSVP cards and stamps, after that I may ( on foot of reading how stressed everyone is) send them texts the day after the RSVPs are due to be returned saying how sorry I am they can't make it!! image uber calm with ten weeks to go we shall see how things sit in six weeks time...  Luck to you all x

  • Ems2905Ems2905 Posts: 144

    I am only having a small wedding with 50 but still have had so many people not RSVP but they assume I know they are coming.   One lady at my work has not RSVP but told me she had booked the hotel........take it that means she is coming !!   Not even my sister or step sister-in-law have RSVP and both have girls are my bridesmaids - obviously I know they are coming but still would like the little card back!. x 

  • HydrogirlHydrogirl Posts: 809

    i used the excuse that i needed to k now dietry requirements in advance thats y i was being so pushy to get RSVPs back but everyone was like yeah of course im coming - im not a mind reader

    MIL from hell said that i should just presume everyone i have invited is coming WTF!!!! she never gave back her rsvp either - cow

  • H2B told me I have his full support for the "sorry you can't make it texts"! I have RSVP cards as part of my invitations, and we will put stamps on them so they have NO excuse!! Luck to you all... 

  • Definitely recommend sending out RSVP cards with stamps on... Absolutely worth it!

  • tinkymootinkymoo Posts: 419

    I get married in 29 days, handed rsvps with envelopes printed with stamps... my own nan hasnt sent hers back lol! Ive given up now! Handed final figures to the venue so if i havent been told people are coming  then they arent now! 

    I am stupidly stressed, beginning to question if getting matried 200 miles away after xmas was a good idea :-/ 

    I am on a last minute crash of 5:2 diet.. well 4:3 for me to try and shift some weight. Fingers crossed x

  • We've not done RSVPs, instead we are giving everyone both our email addresses and phone numbers. Seeing as everyone now a days is attached to their phones we thought that would be the best way to get people to reply! We are offering a menu choice so hopefully that will spur people into replying anyway.

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