Six Months to go and Feeling Low
So today is exactly six months until we tie the knot, but rather than feeling happy of excited I am feeling abit overwhelmed and under the weather!
I have a habit of biting off more than I can chew and feel like I have surpassed myself at the moment. As well as being 3 months into a big budget wedding planning, we are also buying our house. My fiancé is self employed so mortgage application is in my name only; I am having to stick out a job I detest to be able to get the mortgage. I leave on January 2nd so mortgage has to be completed by then but it still feels like a long way away. I turn around problem stores as a retail manager and despite thinking I'd solved the problems, after a few months of performing, they are now back to being sh*t bags so I am trying to get them back in line at a time when I should be finalising things for Christmas.
I am on a diet for the wedding and wanted to lose three stone. I lost 6ibs immediately after setting the date and as I've been stressed since then I flat lined for three months, which I was happy with. I've had a tough couple of weeks at work and have been stress eating and have put 8ibs on! Last weekend I saw my fiancé awake for 90 minutes as I was working so much and all we ever talk about is work, the wedding or the mortgage.
My best friend had her son two months ago so I spend my days off visiting her and cooking cleaning etc for her while she breast feeds but it was my 30th birthday three weeks ago and she didn't even send a card. I'm family sure I'm over reacting but feel a tad hurt by that.
To summarise, instead of feeling like everything is coming together, I feel more like it is slipping out of my grasp. My H2B is great and very supportive, I just hardly ever see him.
Sorry to whinge, I just needed a good old fashioned vent xx