I think my sister is a bully but I love her and don't want to loose her.
Okay weddings are stressful but second time around I thought I was a bit more sussed. But one of my sisters is creating me so much stress not just about the wedding but in general and I don’t know what to do for the best.My family have so many “issues” you could write a book but nobody would believe it and it would be mistakenly filed as fiction. My mother and one of my sisters are truly a nightmare. They will not be at my wedding of course or my dad who couldn’t and never has given a damn about me.
I am the eldest of five (nightmare sister is in the middle) and the next one in age to me is the problem. Despite my being the eldest she has always been more confident than me and she speaks to me in a way that although she passes it off as honest I think it’s rude and can be nasty and lately it’s making me feel really upset. When we were kids she did this but it’s weird how speaking to her can still shred me to pieces.
First there’s the buffet food. I am a Vegan and fiancé (meat-eater) and I found a great caterer who goes up and down the country doing catering and most of the people who eat her food are not vegans. The food sounded great. Sister said she didn’t like vegan food, was going to bring some sandwiches. I thought well okay fine suit yourself, but then she said “vegan food is horrible, your guests will hate it because it’s disgusting and they will just leave and go to McDonalds.” That was really upsetting and I spoke to fiancé who assured me that most of the guests would be curious and be happy to try the food, none of it was “weird."
Last week we met up for a cup of coffee and again she ripped into me. In the last six months, I have lost a fair bit of weight. I was a size 16 and am now an 8-10. I love wearing smaller clothes but I have always had rheumatoid arthritis (my whole life) and had been so poorly, with the added weight I was struggling to walk. I even needed a wheeled walking frame. Now I can walk miles, pain free no medication. This was the reason I lost it, not to wear skinny jeans. Now she is very big a size 22 and a smoker and I worry about her health but keep my mouth shut it's her business. She told me I looked terrible and had lost my boobs (I'm still a D-cup) and looked like our alcoholic aunt before she died. Then she told me my hair was thinning (it really isn’t) and my jumper was hideous. I said nothing, just mumbled that I was feeling much better now I had lost the weight. She told me she is bringing food for her, her boyfriend) and his three daughters because allegedlly they hate Vegan food as well. She is assuming that she is doing my hair and make-up but after telling me I look like crap, frankly I don’t want her to. I would rather have my dreadful hair and dreadful face dealt with by someone else. But if I do say anything I don’t like I have enough strength to deal with the fall out. I have a history of anxiety and now I can’t help but worry that everyone will hate the wedding food and I will look like crap.