Anyone else feel like cancelling?
Hi guys, I'm getting married 20/10/18. At the beginning I was super excited but now I just feel crushed heres the reasons why-
1.I lost my grandma and granddad within 3 months of each other this year and they were my only grandparents, I always envisioned them to be there.
2. My dad is so disinterested and doesn't contact me unless I make contact, he's asked me not to invite my mother as he hates her and said 'you cannot ask me not to say anything to your mother if I see her'. I'm trying to get my day guestlist together so I asked if he was definitely coming (he never went to my brothers wedding) his reply 'up to now yes'.
3. My sister who I am extremely close to is refusing to come if my mother is there, they haven't spoken in 9 years and recently they had a massive argument. I tried to compromise and told me sister that our mother is only coming to the ceremony and that she will be seated with my in-laws (who are the best people ever) because I really want her there but this isn't good enough for my sister 'if she is in the same room as me and my children then I wont be there'. My sister also cancelled our annual sister night out because of all this.
4. My MOH is absolutely no existent, she ignored me for 4 days and then when she finally got in touch I didn't reply so the next day she called me an ignorant ungrateful bitch so I stated that considering she read my message on the Monday and yet left it till the Thursday to reply she is the ignorant one. I told her my colour scheme I was having (grey with a little gold added here and there) and she replied that she did not like that as grey was depressing and would make the day a downer, sends me pictures of bridesmaid dresses that I see are not appropriate (very low cut so she can show off her new boobs, splits up to the crotch area) and gets mad when I disapprove. Has refused to come on my hen do using the excuse she has to work even though it isn't till May 2018. I started a group chat for her and my other bridesmaid so they could send each other ideas and surprise surprise she did not want to do that. I know she is lashing out at me at the moment because I cannot attend her birthday meal which is on a sunday night and as I explained to her I cannot do sundays as I have to get my children to bed for school and ready for school the next day, I offered to do something else with her but she is not want that.
I know my points are about my mother but how can I tell the woman who has been there for me through my post-natal depression, supported me when my ex walked out and left me and my two children with nothing, the only person in my family to offer to help towards the cost of my wedding that she cannot come because my dad and sister don't want her there. My mother is a pain in the arse who makes mistakes and says the wrong things but don't we all?!
Can anyone offer me advise because I feel I cannot speak to anyone, I am hugely stressed out and all I want to do is cry. Its affecting my relationship with my partner because he doesn't understand why I'm so upset as his family have always and still are really close. Sometimes I get jealous and wish I had a family like his.
Sorry for ranting