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Family problems..help!!



 





Hey,

I really need some help and advice.

Im planning the wedding of my dreams to the man of my dreams in October me and H2b are paying for the whole thing ourselves 

Sadly at the age of 13 i lost my mum and the whole wedding planning has been hard for me luckily my h2b and best friends are amazing and have helped me so much.

My dad on the other hand hes been useless not asked about the wedding, hes just really told me who i should and shouldn't invite really not asked about anything else, oh and also told me hes not doing a speech.

Sadly last week grandad passed away and already my dad has fallen out with his brother and now my dad is sending me horrible messages telling me if my uncle or cousins are coming to the wedding hes not and i have to choose? I understand theae text messages were sent drunk but 3 days later and he still hasn't messaged me at all to apologise or speak to me sober.

What the hell do i do? Say screw it im having my family there and if he really wont come to his only daughters wedding becuase of this then its his loss??..becuase i also have this fear at the back of my mind hes going to get drunk at my wedding and ruin it anyway.

Any advice would be amazing as i really dont want to upset anybody and im really close to my cousins and would hate for them not to be there.

X

 


Posts

  • Ambam19Ambam19 Posts: 586 New bride

    What a horrible situation 🙁

    Have you sent out the invites yet? I would advise letting the dust to settle for another week or so and theb trying to approach your dad if he's not spoken to you by then x

  • Ambam19 wrote (see post):

    What a horrible situation 🙁

    Have you sent out the invites yet? I would advise letting the dust to settle for another week or so and theb trying to approach your dad if he's not spoken to you by then x

    Yeaab invites were sent out like 2 weeks ago and my  cousins and uncle have been really excited booking hotels and keeping in touch. Thank you x

  • Tanya128Tanya128 Posts: 1,993

    I think that you need to speak to your dad when he isn't drinking and tell him how you feel, explain that it's your wedding day and that you want all your family there, peacefully. If he can't do this and assure you that your fears are unfounded then maybe you are right that he shouldn't be there. A parent who truly loves their child would never put them in such a position he should be putting your happiness first and putting his personal differences aside. 

  • SadieeeSadieee Posts: 1,781 New bride

    If it were me I'd speak to him sober and explain that the cousins and uncle are coming, they are your family and you love them just like you love him, and if he can't deal with that then that's his problem and maybe best if he didn't come.

    Grief does funny rings yo people and I really hope he comes to his senses in time 

     

     

  • Mrs_BadgerMrs_Badger Posts: 1,440 New bride

    Stick with who you've invited but send them all a message saying its your and your husbands day, you don't want any trouble... if it continues, well, they won't be welcomed.

  • Futuremrsb95Futuremrsb95 Posts: 425

    I appreciate it's hard planning a wedding when you ve lost a parent. I think you shouldn't pander to your dads wishes, hopefully it's just grief that's making him act inappropriately and he comes to his senses but if not it his loss and your other family sounds so excited to be part of your day. 

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