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I think my BF is thinking of cheating on me.

I just got off the phone with him, and he says he’s coming home straight away after work. I didn’t tell him that I was using his laptop to check my emails and when I turned it on, Skype automatically launched upon startup. I found out he had been chatting with this woman, and they’re planning on meeting each other by attending some event called dream tours for singles. At first, I was in disbelief and was really angry, but now I just feel deeply hurt.


I’m planning on confronting him about it when he gets here, but idk how to approach the subject. From what I gathered, they’ve only been chatting for about a month now and have been exchanging selfies, but that’s it. I think about how he’s planning on cheating on me during the event and it just makes my chest hurt. Should I give him another chance? After all, he didn’t technically cheat on me yet. Please give me some advice! I’m so confused.



  • kitty-kitty- Posts: 121 New bride

    I would just sit him down and explain it plain. It’s up to you whether you give him another chance but personally I’d walk straight away. Once a cheater always a cheater. If you take him back you’re suggesting that it’s ok to be treated this way (in my personal opinion) 

  • I would agree with the PP. He may not have cheated physically yet but the plan is still there...why a singles event otherwise? I say physically cheated because some people speak of emotional affairs. What you class as an emotional affair is down to you and your boundaries though. Talk to him to find out why he has done this though and see what he has to say. Even if you do end up leaving him at least you've some closure. I think I'd be feeling the same way as you if I found out my H2B was planning to meet up with a random woman but try to remain calm because the first thing he's going to do is become defensive as he will see it as invading his privacy (albeit you were innocently using his laptop) and his defensiveness is likely to make you angry which will not help the situation. So remain calm to stop the situation from escalating and then he'll be more likely to discuss why he's been a right frigging turd 😔

  • Rach371Rach371 Posts: 1,135 New bride

    He's not thinking of cheating on you, he's already done it. He's made plans to meet someone and to me just because nothing physical has happened yet his intentions aren't good. 

    I'm so sorry, I've been in your position. I stayed with a man who cheated on me for years and it destroyed my confidence. If you want to DM me for support please do.x

  • britbirdbritbird Posts: 1,486 New bride

    Leave him.  I was with someone who nearly destroyed my life for a number of years.  Since we split up- him leaving me with £60k of his debt to clear- I found out he had numerous affairs, had women he was stealing money from all over the UK and Europe etc.  It all started with online chats.  You OH has already cheated on you by talking for a month.  

  • MrsS2019MrsS2019 Posts: 137 New bride


  • KatharynKatharyn Posts: 17

    Tell him what you saw and tell him that it's the reason why you're breaking up with him. Don't forgive him if he asks for forgiveness. Be firm and end the relationship forever. Then heal yourself, rebuild yourself, and move on.

    Men who cheat will always cheat. It's in their DNA. Women who are cheated on become insecure, and that's not even the worst-case scenario. You don't want to go down that path.

    I'm so sorry this happened. Don't let him or anyone put the blame on you because it's not your fault. He's just a jerk. There are better men who will make you feel truly special and one-of-a-kind.

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