overwhelmed

Did anyone else feel totally overwhelmed when finding a dress?

If tv is anything to go by, finding a wedding dress is supposed to be the fun part right? I was imagining my mum and friends in tears, us all laughing every minute and a glass of prosecco in hand.

I went on Saturday with my two friends and mum and the whole thing was totally overwhelming. 

I hate being center of attention as it goes but thought it would be ok given the crowd however everyone had a ton of opinions and seemed a bit fed up by the end. My mum said (in between yawns) white wasn't my colour (!) and I should go for a blush shade dress instead.  Every dress I tried on people weren't too sure of or had their own personal favorites and my head was just a bit of a mess afterwards rather than feeling happy!? Did anyone else not enjoy the wedding dress experience?!

 

Posts

  • RB2SRB2S Posts: 45 New bride

    I hated wedding dress shopping! 

  • Julia101Julia101 Posts: 162 New bride

    I wouldn't say I enjoyed mine either... Wearing a big dress and being the centre of attention really isn't me! (I enjoyed the wedding though😂)   I only took one friend with me because she loves fashion and the dresses and didn't mind, and I valued her honest opinion... I took my mum once I found the dress I wanted just so she didn't feel left out (she's a four hour drive away though). All the fittings I went to alone and happily so!  I wouldn't worry about not enjoying it.. I think a lot us expect it to be a magical experience but for me it was just buying a pretty dress. Too many opinions can be daunting. Have a really good think about the ones you like and go for something you really love regardless of what others say. There are many different shades of white too apparently so one will definitely suit you! maybe go for a sneaky try on by yourself and then ask people their opinions after?  My boutique was lovely and took pictures to send to me, and the assistant picked out a dress that she thought would suit me and it ended up being the one.. it's their job too so they won't get fed up! good luck x 

  • I hated it, never got ' the feeling' and felt rushed and pressured into picking something. I liked what I had but I don't think I looked as good as I imagined I would feel.  Just listen to your gut and don't be afraid to speak out. In a good shop the assistant should be able to help with styles that suit body shapes and once you know what looks good you can try different ones of those style. I regret not trying a coloured dress tbh or more styles but I do think what I went for was the best for my dumpy shape 😝

  • I hated it to, some of it was the service, and some of it was because I thought I knew what I wanted but hated everything I tried on. I wasn't shown any alternative styles in 3 of the 5 shops, they just kept pulling the same.

    I eventually stopped taking people with me and when I could think on my own I found my dress, my friends thought they were doing me a favour by trying to keep me on track with my vision but actually it just made me feel completely overwhelmed and despairing at ever finding the one.

    I eventually brought a beaded all over and lace modified a line that was fitted to past my hips and was also strapless. I had said not too much beading, not fitted (I wanted boho vintage) and not strapless under any circumstances.

  • My previous experiences weren't great either. I'm not sure I hated the experience, but it definitely wasn't good.  And I absolutely did hate my dress.  I ended up shopping at a very dumpy David's Bridal, thinking I couldn't afford anything else. The store was so beat up (borderline dirty) and the staff was beyond pathetic. They royally screwed up my order and my alterations. Knowing what I know now, I would be a better shopper and try sample sales or some of the more affordable designers and avoid David's like the plague.

    One thing I did know then and I hold to now is GO ALONE. At least once. The only opinion you'll get then is your own.

  • Grace24Grace24 Posts: 37

    I never got the "this is the one" moment that you see on Say Yes to the Dress. I initially only took my mum because she is completely honest with me. We ended up visiting about 6 different stores and I must've tried on 30-40 dresses in the end. The experience is more enjoyable if you're at a weight that you're comfortable with, which I wasn't the first couple of times. I'd say either go on your own or with just one person whose opinion you trust most until you narrow it down. I took my sisters (who were my bridesmaids) back to help me choose between the final two.

    The shop assistant should make the experience enjoyable, even if you are on your own, and if they aren't doing that, then leave. 

    Good luck!

  • GinAndBlingGinAndBling Posts: 1,311 New bride

    I found the whole thing a bit overwhelming too. I’ve never had ”the feeling“ either. 

    my dress is one that I love, and that was at a price point I was comfortable with. I found it impossible to chose between so many gorgeous dresses! 

    Our planning thread: We're completely winging it.
    Our report: A fun, classic May day in navy and blush
    My weightloss thread: Diet denial! 
  • Say yes to the dress (usa) has a lot to answer for. It takes on average 8 hours to film one bride and the camera keeps rolling until they get those awful bitchy moments or brides in tears..I would say yes just to get the hell out of there.

    Brides also don't choose their entourage the producers do dependent on what the bride has said about them hence why it makes good tv

  • Gill40Gill40 Posts: 18 New bride

    I had a dress in mind, based on a prom-style wedding dress I'd seen.  I'm 59 and been married once before, I didn't want white because I didn't want to look as though I was trying to be 25 again.  Blue's my favourite colour, so I went to a local dressmaker who specialises in wedding dresses and she's made me a beautiful prom style dress, cornflower blue with a delicate lace over the top, and lace sleeves (to cover my horrific arms).  I'm lucky because I'm absolutely over the moon with what she's come up with......and it cost me £650, where the original dress I'd seen was over £2,000 and only came in white.  Reading some of the horror stories about wedding dress shopping on here, I know how lucky I am!!

     

  • I didnt even realise going on my own was an option?! The more I think about it the more I’m thinking this might be the way to go... it maybe just without my mum who yawned and moaned her way through the whole thing 🤷🏼‍♀️

  • I went on my own a couple of times as it was just easier than getting everyone together and I had tried on so many dresses. The boutiques I went to didn’t bat an eyelid when I  said I’d found shopping with bms and mob overwhelming. I had a great time trying dresses on my own and I found the girls would give more honest opinions as there was no crowd to please. I felt I could also speak freely and think on my own. Only once I’d found and paid for it did I take anyone back with me! 

  • MrsCToBeeMrsCToBee Posts: 2,949 New bride

    I felt quite stressed and intimidated by it - just took my mum. Luckily I found a dress I really liked in the first shop I visited, it was a great price in their sample sale so I bought it.

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