I am needing some impartial advice!
We have only been engaged for a few weeks and it's been wonderful, everyone was so happy for us and spoilt us with lovely celebrations.
However, since we've started to plan the wedding both of our families have been very forceful about where it should be, when it should be, how much we should spend, who should be invited, who should be in the bridal party etc etc. I am finding it very overwhelming! For example, my younger step brother has already been told that he will be a groomsman by his mother before my partner and I have even had a chance to think about it......I mean we haven't even booked a venue yet! And now I feel that that expectation has been set but I do not want my step brother to have a roll in the wedding as we are not very close and he's a lot younger than I am and isn't very polite or well behaved.... even so it's up to my partner who he chooses to have as his groomen. I haven't actually agreed to anything, I've just said that we haven't thought that far ahead yet...but even so I feel like its a desicion that's been made for me that I can't get out of without upsetting people. I really do not want to fall out with anyone or have any tension.
This is just the start of it.....a list of over 20 people that neither of us know has been put on us to invite, I've been quizzed on and had hints regarding the top table, fueds that I never know existed have now emerged and threats have been made....!
I feel like everyone is getting well ahead of themselves and that they feel like that have a right to dictate what we should and shouldn't do. I feel that I am being pushed into doing everything a certain way to keep 'peace'
How do I now approach these issues without falling out with anyone? I have never fallen out with my family before, but I am feeling that I if I don't do what people want then they will fall out with me and I really dont want that.
Any advice would be appreciate.