I was just looking for your take and advice on this please.
One of my bridesmaids is going through a bit of a transition in life, she moved home from New York when her relationship broke down.
She has been living with her parents and working various contracts over the last couple of years. Each time we meet up she has a different plan; to settle in the UK and buy a home, to go travel, to go work abroad etc.
The latest plan is to spend a number of weeks in Asia, a timeline that overlaps with my hen. When I said to her ‘so you are missing my hen?’ she said she has to make her own plans in life and the timing is unfortunate and will let me know if her plans change… no apology nothing. I just feel like she isn’t really making an effort to go to the hen and travel.
Naturally I am pretty upset about this. I (consider myself) to be very relaxed and not a demanding bride. My hen is in the city where we live, I am paying for everything myself, I have paid for all the bridesmaids dresses, bags, hair, makeup , gifts and accommodation for the wedding. My bridesmaids wont be out of pocket apart from our one night out for the hen and whatever drinks they have at the wedding (in addition to the wine and champagne provided)
I just feel like she is deliberately either a; trying to get out of being a bridesmaid for a reason I don’t know or b; trying to make it about her. I wanted to treat my bridesmaids to dinner in a few weeks too but she said she is planning a weekend away and it will probably be that weekend (after saying she was free that weekend and I booked on that basis)
Am I being unreasonable?