H2B Brothers Girlfriend

I feel really silly bringing this up or asking for suggestions but my H2b brothers girlfriend and I really dont get on I really dont want her coming to the wedding in july and spoiling our big day. She is very very loud when she has a drink and shouts her mouth off at anything looks down her nose at anything and everything. I have dropped it into converstaion with H2B that I think she shouldnt get an invite but he recons that his brother wont come either.

Whats a girl to do????


  • Hi Mishel

    Could you not just say that you ae limited on numbers (blame it on venue, whatever) and just give her an evening invite?

    If H2B's brother doesn't come, thats up to him.....

    I know it sounds harsh, but why should we have to invite people just because on OUR special day! image

    How long have they been together hun?

    Niks x
  • shelnpaulshelnpaul Posts: 126
    Thanks Niks

    They have been together for about 6 months - she comes everywhere with him, everytime he pops up low and behold she will be be behind him. I hear her before I see her.

    They are on about moving in together now she lives round the corner from us - i will never get away.

    I feel really awful about how I feel but I cant really imagine her there on our day. xxx
  • mellenukmellenuk Posts: 576
    That is a really tough one mishel. Family politics is the worst! And it sounds like these two are stuck together like glue!

    As much as it'd be great to say she's not coming, and it's up to his brother if he comes without her, I'm not too sure whether this is the right thing to do. I'm sure your H2B would be really gutted if his brother wasn't there, and may even feel resentment about this potential "ultimatum".

    How many do you have coming to your wedding? Is there any chance of clever seating (i.e. sticking her in a corner somewhere?!).

    When is your wedding? How long will they have been together when you get married?

    We've actually said to our friends (which I know is slightly different) that they'll only get a plus one if they're in a serious relationship. Harsh, but when you're considering who to invite you do have to think about numbers, as Niks suggested. If you can get away with this, then maybe just invite her to the evening?

    I really hope you can get it sorted out, and if you do have to compromise then remember not to let it spoil your day xxx
  • downesydownesy Posts: 47
    At least I know I'm not the only one with someone like that in the family (so to speak), my brothers wife is exactly the same, my mum is aware of the situation - I've deceided to put her on the table with my brother godfather (he is also aware) so he can keep an eye on her, my mum also said that if she starts she will ask her to leave as she will not upset me on my wedding day and cause a scene etc!!

    I know it sounds harsh but I'm giving her the opportunity to prove me wrong and 'behave' on the day and if not she will be asked to leave!!

    Good luck xx
  • shelnpaulshelnpaul Posts: 126
    Thanks everyone for that - I might have to sit down and re think the table plans, seating her somewhere with someone to keep an eye on her. Think i will have to keep her away from the wine so at least she will be 10 decibals quieter than with alcohol. My mum has said today that she will pull her to one side if she starts anything so that has made me feel a bit better.

    Thanks xxx

  • Joey0810Joey0810 Posts: 537
    I don't know how many people you are having to your wedding, but if you need to cut the numbers down, we are using the rule of only inviting the other half if they are engaged. Otherwise we will over our numbers! In terms of not inviting someone you don't want there. I am currently battling out this one with my parents, who are paying for our wedding. I think /I may have to give in at the end, if I do we plan to place her in the far corner of the room with her back to us so that way she is neither close to us and we cant see her face either! Not particularly kind I know but we really wouldn't be able to enjoy our day with her looking at us or speaking loudly in our earshot! I definitely think it is a good idea to have somebody like a godfather to keep an eye on them uif something happens. could you not somebody else rather your mum, someone who isn't so immediate family. The reason I say this, is because it would be unfair for your mum not to enjoy your wedding day if she has to spend most of the day keeping an eye on her! xxx
  • downesydownesy Posts: 47
    Hi Piggy, yeah I think I might ask godfather to do the duties (he is an ex policeman - so used to keeping trouble in line). She has previously been banned from drinking at my parents - by my dad!! My mum reckons its to do with jealousy!! Good thinking about also placing her with her back to us!!!
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