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Anyone else not having a hen do?

I thought having a hen do would be amazing. but since my moh have been planning (or should I say lack of planning) I'm beginning to think its more hassle than its worth? Was so excited but the invites have gone out, hardly anyone has responded even to say no and I'm worried it'll turn into a disaster! Anyone else been through this? If you have was the hen do worth it?


  • wenlockwenlock Posts: 103

    I am having a hen do, but I ended up having to invite more people (including relatives) than I really wanted to.  I'm sure your's will be really lovely whoever comes.  I went to a hen do a couple of years ago where there were only 5 of us, but we had a *great* time.  We went out on the town, got a bit tipsy and did all the dares etc.  And because there were so few of us we didn't have to book activities or restaurants.  It was awesome!

    My fiance wasn't really bothered about having a stag.  In the end I pushed him into doing something, but it was really small and laid back (almost not really like a stag do at all!).


  • MrsBeau2BMrsBeau2B Posts: 1,513

    I'd be inclined to say that you should have one - afterall it might be your only chance! But make sure its what you want to do, and as for people not replying, give them a chase! There are all sorts of reasons why people dont reply straight away, (as seen on the many RSVP threads we see on here!) so try not to think the worst!

    My hen was last week and i was thrilled with it - i hope yours works out the same!!

  • CetaceaCetacea Posts: 654

    I've considered not having one but I think my MOH won't let me  but if she wants me to have one it's up to her, I've got enough going on as is! I've not given it more than a handful of google searches, it's not high up on my to do list. If it happens, it happens, if it doesn't, it doesn't.

    Personally I don't really see the point, most of my friends live too far away to come anyway. Unless it was literally the day before the wedding- which is absolutely out of the question for me-  it would be about 3 people + me. That being said, since I don't see my friends that often it might be quite nice to have a girly night but if it happens it will be pretty low key, some sort of fun day time activity and a couple of drinks followed by a girly night in. Essentially a fancy sleepover with sparkling wine. 

     I've never seen the appeal of a traditional hen do, ie. slutty outfits and drinking until you fall over and throw up on the pavement. Just doesn't sound like fun to me. Maybe I'm weird.  Plus, if I really wanted to do that, I could do it for Halloween. I don't get the whole 'one last night of freedom' thing, surely if you think you couldn't go out for drinks with your friends after getting married, you are not marrying the right person?? 


  • Im not going to have one. All the people I would want to come are spread all over the country, Wales, Hong Kong and France. None of them know each other, and it would just be too much hassle. Plus Im getting on and dont fancy the getting dressed up and traipsing round bars.

    If I could get everyone together for an evening in a country pub with some music, I would do it, but its just not practical. I think I may just do a spa thing with one of my friends, we went for a weekend last year and loved it.

  • JodielouJodielou Posts: 4,058

    My hen do was really low key, and so was hubby's stag.  For mine, we went to the theatre in the afternoon (it was to see The  Full Monty though!) followed by dinner in the evening and drinks in a nice cocktail bar with a section specially reserved for us. There was no dressing up or games, apart from a Mr&Mrs quiz (courtesy of OH's Aunt) in the restaurant. I had a great time!  I did organise my own hen (and hubby's stag to be honest!) just because it was easier for me to do it- I don't have any sisters and none of my friends are friends with each other if that makes sense?!  It was definitely worth it though, despite the hours spent chasing people for deposits etc! I don't think there's any such thing as a 'typical' hen and I'm sure you'll have a lovely time Rhi x

  • KK12KK12 Posts: 927

    I think these days, it's what you want to do or not.... a lot of brides put themselves under pressure to have the perfect hen do and there's enough pressure with the wedding, maybe having mini hen do's is the answer.

    I'm not too fussed myself to be honest although one of my bridesmaids wants us to go off to Spain!

  • SimmieSimmie Posts: 1

    To be honest I didn't enjoy mine at all. All I wanted was dinner and drinks but I was coerced into booking a cocktail class which was good but nobody made an effort. No l plates, no sashes, no badges. Thoroughly disappointing. Felt I was on someone elses night out. Would like to wipe it from my memory to be honest. Hope my wedding is enjoyable because that really wasn't.

  • I'm still unsure as to whether or not mine will go ahead. I don't have a best friend who would organise it and bridesmaids are mine and H2Bs sister who both have different ideas for it. I wanted something low key but my sister ad cousins have big ideas for going abroad. I know a lot of my friends wouldn't be able to afford it and I don't want anything big anyway! 

    I don't want to organise it myself as have enough to do with the wedding and work so completely understand where you're coming from!

    I've been on some fun hen parties but they had always been well organised by the hens friends! Whatever you decide know that the hen is not important, the wedding day is what it is all about! image 

  • Ive organised my hen do! Im having a hot tub party on the friday at my house H2B is staying at his mums for the weekend. N then on the Saturday were going into Liverpool. Im a bit miffed ive ended up organising it and i feel to be honest nobody gives a crap about my hen do but it is 103 days away so i think im just being daft. I dont want to have to depend on praying my maids sort out banners and stuff im just thinking order it all myself! I know if they did not get me any and id not of got any id be gutted!

  • I'm not having a hen do. I couldn't think of anything worse than wearing L plates, drinking through a penis shaped straw while some man waves his actual penis in my face then trying to persuade 5 random men to part with their underwear as part of a dare. The thought makes me cringe. 

    I *might* go to a spa with a friend but I wouldn't consider that a hen do, just a time to relax in the run up to the wedding. 

  • kitten2kitten2 Posts: 2,240
    I think I would like a hen do but none of my friends know each other, I (like others) will end up organising it and I would spend the whole time worrying about if other people are enjoying themselves.

    I've asked my sisters, who are my BMs, to organise a glamping trip and we'll go to the zoo. I've even given them a link to the place but I'll still end up driving there as I'm the only one who can drive and who has a big enough car.

    I feel like I'm being a brat about it and it is still 10 months to the hen do weekend I've allocated (I really have made it easy for them) so it's no wonder they haven't booked anything. But seeing as none of them came dress shopping with me or seems bothered about the wedding, I'm just a teeny bit annoyed image
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