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OMG Give me strength

LeaBLeaB Posts: 1,706

Why do people have to give their opinion on your wedding plans! I am getting fed up of it now.... I am naturally a strong character and finding it really hard to bite my lip. I have 64 days left to go and feel I am going to snap at someone and it is not good.

The latest being as we are having a small wedding abroad, I have ordered artificial flowers these include buttonhole for My dad, h2b and my brother (usher) and corsages for the mums and my nan of which i have paid for. Originally I had said coral for the men and cream for the women. My mum has since bought her dress and it is a taupe colour at the bottom with cream lace at the top so she asked me to change her corsage colour - which I had no issue with. So i asked my mil2b is she wanted to change her color as her dress is cream with coral and blue flowers on... she said she didn't know, I said I need to know asap as the flowers are being made as we speak ... she said I will let you know when I have  spoken to my sister! what how old are you! So last night we went around and I took a coral flower and she didnt like it, so we tried a creamy flowers didnt like it. She said I need to choose a different colour I said no they are all being the same. So she had a paddy and said you choose then. Now i have just had a text saying hope you have ordered flowers for everyone... I said Nope just the wedding party and mums she said oh that is strange for a wedding! How about shush!

I am starting to get teary at everyones stupid selfish comments, and am wishing the wedding away now.... I just want it to be over! This is not how I wanted to feel in the run up to my wedding day.


  • Weddin crazyWeddin crazy Posts: 1,743

    I know it's hard when ppl start pickin at little details and trust me 99% of b2b would say they felt exactly the same when planning the wedding but trust me, just relax let ppl say what they want, u do wt u want n all of this will not even enter anyone's minds on ur wedding day image

  • NowMrsH2014NowMrsH2014 Posts: 345

    So sorry LeaB, Wedding crazy is right though, i think it is very common.

    I have never heard of 'everyone' having flowers before? like you i have button holes for, Groom, Best Man, Groomsman, My dad, FIL2B, our 2 little boys, and corages for mum, MIL2B and my nan.

  • LeaBLeaB Posts: 1,706

    Thanks ladies.

    MrsH2be it is really old fashioned. I have never been to a wedding and wore one. Glad I am not the only one image

  • AmyAmyAmyAmy Posts: 8

    I've only just started to look for venues and I feel the same! Keep thinking I've found the one but peoples comments putting me off. Mum has decided she's making the cake and keeps trying to book me in for wedding dress shopping. bridesmaids are telling me what colour dresses they can't have as it won't suit their skin/hair. Really am considering to have a tiny quiet affair with very few guests and used the money we save to have a long honeymoon alone!!

  • LeaBLeaB Posts: 1,706

    aw amy, i think in the early planning you just need to be brutal and make your and h2b decision together.... My early stages were ok its now nearing the time comments are coming up. and mil2b is soooooo negative anyway it is now turning towards the wedding. I fear I will snap at her and being an only child h2b will stand up for her! my dad keeps telling me to bite my lip but its getting hard. The fact that we have paid for her flight, accomodation and spending money (even though she has lots of money) when my parents have paid there own and give us money towards the wedding and not even said a negative word they have let me make my own choices and been encouraging. I just think its rude of her to put me down!


  • NowMrsH2014NowMrsH2014 Posts: 345

    LeaB - that is a bit cheeky of her, i think you have gone over and above with supplying them with spending money!!! Just do what YOU want, and if she don't like the colour of the flower you have chosen, then tell her not to wear one at all!! xx

  • Victoria25Victoria25 Posts: 250

    I have learnt that you basically have to stop asking people what they want and just go with what you want lol.

    I find it very difficult to put it into practice though!!  Good luck, sounds like more hassle than necessary.

    Also, flowers for all the guests is VERY old fashioned!  My parents said they had it at theirs but they got married in the 60s.  My mum said she thought it was a waste of money even then!

  • LavwonLavwon Posts: 113

    My future MIL makes a face or disapproving noise at everything, I've decided to ignore her! My bridesmaids have been very helpful and supportive and so has my H2B. We've pretty much kept our plans to ourselves until they're booked.

  • Definitely stay strong minded and stick to what you want. I've been that way through the whole planning process and had no trouble. My trouble has come to the hen do where the MIL seems to have planned what she wants to do rather than what I want to do so now trying to resolve this issue politely.

  • I went to a wedding where everyone had button holes given to them.. half of the guests never wore them as they were given pins to put on their clothing and in fear of ruining their clothes never wore them and left them in the church!

    would be a waste of money to have them as the guests wont be bothered about the flowers now a days, the main focus will be the bride and her lovely flowers - so do what makes you happy!

  • its your wedding honey, and i certainly wont be providing flowers for all xxx

  • herstoryherstory Posts: 1,268

    LeaB, your h2b may stick up for her but when it comes down to it he should side with you! It took my h2b a few years to get this and his mum played on it, now she knows I am the number one woman in his life she is much easier to deal with! H2b will always side with me now in public, sometimes in private he will tell me I was out of line.

    As for the flowers, I am not supplying them for everyone, just the bridal party and immediate family. Years ago everyone used to get buttonholes but if memory serves they were normally cheap flowers like carnations and most people, particularity women didn't put them on for fear of wrecking their clothes.

    If anyone had mentioned supplying flowers for everyone I would ask if they wanted to pay for them, also I think flowers have been replaced with favours you never used to get those!

    I have ordered corsages for the mums and a few other close family members, fingers crossed no one changes their outfit, as they don't know I have done this but I though artificial flower corsages were better than spending the cash on big bouquets that will only last a few weeks, although I may get both mums orchids in pretty pots.



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