Left fuming after over hearing a benefit wedding/baby convo

Actually cant believe what comes out of peoples mouths these days. In my local shop yesterday with my 3 children in tow and behind me in the isle were three ladies (i use the term loosely) screaming at their children and threatening violence if they kept touching things. Could be off the convo as they were incredibly loud. Anyway hear one talking about her big benefit wedding now her latest offspring has arrived early... to my disgust i hear "yeah well i had to make this one come early coz if i didnt we would've missed out on benefits for her and id of had to go to work, like #$@% am i doing that! Got a big back pay from housing so we decided €£$% it get married. His claiming too so got all this money thought a quick do n big piss up n loads of presents sorted" i couldnt believe my ears ur openly bragging you practically put ur little one at risk induced urself to claim money for a wedding to get stuff. Being pregnant myself i felt utterly sick at the thought of it and being a working family disgusted that they were getting away with spitting out children for money to finance their partying lifestyles. I cant believe the world. Not judging people who get help, its a nessessity for some but its not a lifestyle choice.

Sorry to rant but i couldnt believe the cheek

Posts

  • Katherine66Katherine66 Posts: 1,234

    Oh thats awful and i totally agree!    

    Its one thing actually needing beneits, we work and are not claiming any benefifs but my h2b is entitled to low income support and disability allowance, he had a farming accident which nearly took his whole left arm.   

    But to brag about geting the child early to fund a lifestyle is horrid. 

    I had my second daughter induced for what the doctors called social reasons , my then husband was in the for es fresh back from the fjrst gulf war and due to go on duty in germany. We were in england whee i planned to have her but she was late we had 4 weeks leave and 3 weeks in no sign of her.  I was induced and two days later we travelled back to Germany.   Not a perfect start bt we were all fine.  in labour for 13 hours!! 

     

  • Elmo85Elmo85 Posts: 32

    I was induced with my eldest and youngest due to pre eclampsia so they had to come along both 12 days early. I appreciate things need to happen sometimes and for the right reasons but to do it yourself by 7 weeks (as the lady boasted) just to claim a benefit is disgraceful. Then to brag about what their doing with the money is just plain vile. Both my h2b and i work and we raise out 4 children the same as we will when no5 comes along. I think yes if you need help and are entitled to it of course you deserve it BUT to make it very public that you intend to never work again n make a living from the benefit system when ur capable to work then thats plain wrong

  • PinguinPinguin Posts: 141

    you cant 'induce yourself' early (thousands of women try to induce themselves every year just go on babycenter and other websites) and although the advice is to not do it before your due date their has never been any legitimate proof that any of them work, baby simply comes when baby comes and if it was done at hospital it would be medical reasons

  • MrsStobe4MrsStobe4 Posts: 282

    As Pinguin says, absolutely no chance she could have "induced herself", if this was possible my daughter would not have been two weeks late! 

    I expect it was just a kind of phrase she was using, unless obviously she was induced in hospital, but again, this would've been for medical reasons.

  • Elmo85Elmo85 Posts: 32

    I did wonder this because i havent known of anyone successfully doing this and even close family members of mine have gone well over their due dates. It is a relief to know shes not endangered her child so thank you for that

    For me it was purely the boasting and utter disregard for her child and the disgust she had at not being able to claim the money she clearly felt she was entitled to have, as well as declaring that baby no7 is the last one because she wont get any help for anymore. Very frustrating for anyone who works hard for their family, saves for their own wedding and doesnt rely on anyone for financial aid.

     

  • Laura349Laura349 Posts: 996 New bride

    People like that make my blood boil!

    Myself and h2b are on benefits, and we have a 5 year old son. But the reason we are on benefits (which we hate being) is because of my h2b's disability. People who just have children for the money really do rattle my cage!

  • MrsJ2017MrsJ2017 Posts: 3,017

    Id just take it with a pinch of salt. It was a conversation between friends that you overheard. If people heard the talks my friends have i think wed be arrested 😂 Doesnt mean theyre to be taken at face value or literally.

    In fact we have the benefits convo as a running joke, we used to have a friend who made stuff up and i was the benefits cheat because I was a stay at home mum, another friend was the slag because she didnt dream of getting married, and another did cocaine on nights out. None of us speak to her anymore and havent for years but it often comes up in convos "oh youve had your benefits paid in have you?" Or "youre such a bad slag, why cant you just settle down and live the dream" and "youre such a bad influence doing coke and being a teacher, tut tut".

    My point is, dont let it bother you, you dont know any facts here and could easily have been an exaggeration or tongue in cheek thing,

    If anyone really does have babies for money they must be bloody insane and awful at maths, it costs a lot more to have a baby then youd ever get in benefits 😂

  • Sal 3Sal 3 Posts: 1

    Fuck all to do with you Ms Judgey pants

  • SpacepuffinSpacepuffin Posts: 664

    It could be bravado between two friends who may be in a situation which, in reality, they'd rather not be. I wouldn't read too much into it. I'm sure I don't always present my most 'socially impressive' self when I'm cackling with my best mate in the frozen food aisle!

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