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Wedding accommodation offered to some siblings but not others

My brother is getting married in September.  The venue is a remote barn conversion and the venue has 20 rooms which have been booked by my sister in law to be.  My daughter is being a bridesmaid and my son a ring boy.  At the weekend I found out that my mum has been given a room, one of my brothers (who is best man) and his partner have been given a room but not myself, husband and 2 children or my other brother his wife and child who has special needs.  I am really hurt.  Who have the the other 18 rooms been given to as her family is very small? I can’t believe that friends have been prioritised over direct family.  Am I right to feel upset? it’s spoiling the day for me.  I have booked a premier inn which is 7 miles away.  With the hassle of taxis and having to get my daughter to the venue early as she will need make up hair etc.  My nephew with special needs doesn’t like loud noises and struggles to be around people for long periods of time so a room at the venue would have helped my other brother so much as he would have had somewhere to take him if he started to feel anxious.  So disappointed with their decision.  It’s not about finances as we would have been happy to pay.


  • GinAndBlingGinAndBling Posts: 1,311 New bride
    Have they offered them to the parents and adult wedding party first? Or perhaps adults it’s only?

    Unless there’s a massive backstory it doesn’t sound malicious, it’s hard when there’s a limited number of onsite rooms.

    I’m sure your brother could borrow someone’s room on the day if needs be if his son needs some space. 

    If I were you I’d perhaps mention to your brother that if there’s a spare room you’d like to take it but in all honesty I wouldn’t make a big thing of it (unless there’s something else) and certainly wouldn’t let it ruin your enjoyment of their wedding. In reality no one really spends much time in the hotel it’s just somewhere to crash! 
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  • Joanne_lettinJoanne_lettin Posts: 1
    edited July 2019
    I would ask if there are any rooms at the venue going for your brothers family and you. It could well be they have a lot of out of town visitors. 
    It probably isn't meant to be vindictive and they could actually be thinking about keeping the children away from the noise of the party.

    If you don't ask you don't find out. They might say no and explain why. At the end of the day staying on site won't make or break the wedding so don't let it spoilt the day for you.
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