Multicultural/Interfaith Wedding(s)

Hi everyone,

I need help!

H2B proposed on Sunday night and whilst I'm on top of the world, I'm already beginning to get nervous about the amount of planning that needs to be done.

We want to get married next year (2013) but we've established that we will need to have two ceremonies to appease our families and of course, us.

His family at Tamil Sri Lankan so we will be having a Hindu ceremony in addition to the church wedding that I have always dreamed about.

It is impractical to combine both ceremonies into one day so we have agreed to have two  weddings.

We're trying to decide how far apart the two ceronies should be.  I need lots of time to plan and realistically, we're looking at a September/October 2013 wedding date.

H2B wants to have the Hindu wedding next summer. I want to have the church wedding first but know that I won't be able to plan everything before summer.

 

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Posts

  • gemkatgemkat Posts: 264

    hey ladylako,

    we're having a mixed wedding, H2B is Hindu. I am not religious so we're having a civil ceremony before the hindu ceremony all in one day!  we decided that two weddings would be too expensive

    I think if your happy to let his family do most of the planning for the hindu wedding that will free you up for planning the church wedding, so there doesn't necessarily have to be a big gap between the two weddings, I think you have loads of time between now and next summer to plan both weddings.

    The biggest issue we found was finding a suitable venue that didn't cost the earth!

    yay to two multicultural brides to be in 2013! image x

     

  • Hi Gemkat!

    Thanks for your reply.

    That's the thing, two weddings will be really expensive. I wish we could find a way to compromise and have everything on one day.

     

    Watch this space...

     

    You're right though, I will definitely be leaving the hindu ceremony to him and his parents.

    Thanks for the encouragement!

    Have you set a date yet for your wedding? image

  • Malb2b13Malb2b13 Posts: 679

    i agree with gemkat summer next year is enough time to plan for the church wedding. if your super effient and plan to have both on one day your savings will be huge- i photographer/videographer, 1 dj the list could go n and on. with my own planning i found that once i got the ball rolling alot of things kind of linked to other things so lots got done all at once and now i am just fussing over details etc x

  • gemkatgemkat Posts: 264

    our wedding is booked for 19th october next year image

    I think if you can afford it definitly go for the two seperate days! I am having to compromise massively in order to end up with the one day! I am really envious of the vintage weddings with all the muted colours but will look weird with the indian side so we're going bold and bright! with magenta, orange, yellow and hints of red (very indiany!)

    heres a brief run down of our day so far to give you an idea of the epicness of 1 day!

    week before - bride and groom making in manchester (where we live) i'll the wear a bridal mark until the day of the wedding I'll remove it for the western wedding.

    wed before wedding - mehendi - another compromise MIL says this is just a"fashion thing" and they dont do it for the wedding and wants me to apply tumeric on the day of the wedding - I am not chancing getting tumeric on my white dress so will have the henna patterning instead

    day of the wedding (sat) - no booze or meat before the hindu ceremony so no champers for breakfast :-/

    10.30am - civil ceremony in traditional white dress, H2B in suit, bridesmaides in saries

    11 -  photos and garden games

    12 - afternoon tea (veggie + no booze)

    1pm - H2B gets changed into sherwani suit and carries out pre wedding puja with priest in hotel room

    I get changed into wedding sari and  carry out pre wedding puja with priest in my hotel room, my mum will also get changed into a sari

    2pm - hindu ceremony starts and lasts for around 1 1/2 - 2 hours

    4pm - guests finally get a drink! (think they may need one by this point!) image photos in indian clothing

    5pm - indian wedding breakfast - we're having a starter of samosa, pakhora and bhaji, 2 veggie curries and a veg biriani then sorbet to finish.

    7pm - room gets turned around for evening, I go and put my white dress back on, bridesmaides will get changed into western dresses so they can have a dance

    7.30 - cutting of cake and first dance - relax and enjoy being married! image

    weekend after - we travel to in laws for post wedding rituals (this is a massive compromise his mother wanted us to drive 5 hours back from south wales to preston the day after?!)

    just writing all that out makes me feel exhusted! image

     

  • Malb2b13Malb2b13 Posts: 679

    oh my gosh. so much more to it than i ever imagined!! best if luck to both of you!!

  • Gemkat wow!

    Kudos to you! I'm amazed that you've managed to fit everything in.

    H2B has already warned me that there will be no meat or fish on the day of the hindu wedding. If we combined the ceremonies, this would  probably be a problem for my family.

    Also, the last wedding I went to was his sister's and the ceremony alone lasted for around 4/5 hours. I think what you said is key, compromises have to be made.

     

    I'll keep yo updated with progress and you do the same.

     

    x

  • As a photographer I would definitely do a deal for a 2 day wedding!
  • Hey girls, not quite having an interfaith wedding to the same extreme as the both of you, but we are 100% having a multicultural wedding day!

    I'm well, not really religious but h2b is Muslim so we are having a civil ceremony but with lots of Moroccan touches to the day. ie- traditional Moroccan wedding music whilst guest are being seated for the ceremony, Moroccan food still to be decided on, Moroccan tea wedding favours, henna design wedding cake, Moroccan band, Fez's as props for the DIY photobooth, Moroccan fretwork from all the lanterns on the stationary. Also want to work arabic writing in somwhere as well, maybe on the table numbers.

    Must say I'm very lucky that h2b's mum and dad are pretty relaxed about the whole thing! 

    It's nice to know there's a few of us out there!

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