If you're eloping have you told people you're engaged?

We've recently become engaged and have yet to go ring shopping. We've known from the off we'd like to elope and just tell people when we get back. What have people done in terms of telling people their engaged? I really want an engagement ring and my fiance is happy with this. But then if I have a ring people will know we're engaged and will start asking about our wedding plans. 

We have a rough date in mind - next February so it's a long time to keep quiet  


  • Elopements aren't what they used to be: there are no longer clandestine affairs carried out in secret by a couple looking to marry on the sly. An "elopement" by the modern definition just means a wedding with few or no guests other than the couple.  Most peoples' families are perfectly aware that the marriage is occurring - but that the couple has taken a low key, low expense, private route for doing it.

    Get your ring and enjoy it - and just explain to people who ask that you're going for the low-key elopement option.


  • MrsC2017MrsC2017 Posts: 193 New bride

    I would say that elopements can be whatever you want them to be - it sounds like OP wants to only tell people when they are back.  Could you perhaps get a ring and wear it on your other hand, to avoid questions?  

  • We do want the actual marriage to be something people only find out about upon our return. Both our families would be pissed off and cause hell if they knew beforehand. We want to reserve the shitstorm until our return. 

    I think I'd feel weird wearing it on the other hand. It's a good suggestion though. 

  • SadieeeSadieee Posts: 1,781 New bride

    Or have a diamond/whatever stone you want made into a necklace and then have it put into a ring setting to wear whe you come home and tell everyone? So you are always wearing the stone, just first in a necklace and then in a ring if that makes sense?

  • MrsJamesMrsJames Posts: 405 New bride

    Me and my husband got engaged while we were both at university and so we had a really long engagement. By the time we got round to setting a date people had stopped asking.

    It might be worth just telling people you're having a long engagement as you haven't quite decided what sort of wedding you both want yet, people will soon stop asking. 

    I hope this helps.

  • Thank you all

    I think we'll go with the "it's a long engagement" approach. 

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