Bridesmaids hair

both of my BMs announced (separately) that they wanted to dye their hair red. Normally I'd be supportive but as they're wearing teal green dresses for our wedding in June, I got slightly worried (red and green should never be seen) and I had visions of  2 traffic lights stood with me.

one of them said she's going to do it after the wedding (phew)

but the other assured me it would be fine, she's been red before and only had it a dark red tint so wasn't red red. However, after seeing the pics of her new hair, its redder than I was led to believe she was going and I Don't think it's going to look nice with the dress.

so, do I say something? Or do I deal with it and let her have her hair how she wants?

i really don't want my bms lives to revolve around our wedding for the next 3 months but I do need a bit of cooperation!! image



  • jemmykins09jemmykins09 Posts: 618

    i'm sure it'll be fine hun. and unfortunately as you say you can expect them to live their lives around your wedding for the next three months. 

    i'm bridesmaid in may and getting married in nov so see it from both sides. as a bride i'd be miffed if it screwed up my colour scheme, as a bridesmaid i'd be royally hacked off if the bride told me i couldnt dye my own hair or to change something about myself for the wedding. 


    just think of it this way...she could have purple hair, or yellow, neon green.....

  • Claire124Claire124 Posts: 91

    It may well fade over the next few months or she might get bored and dye it again.

  • Mrs K!!Mrs K!! Posts: 664

    My friend didn't want us bridesmaids to have dyed red hair for her wedding last year.  I completely understood and waited until after the wedding to dye my hair one of the other bms was bright red at the time and dyed her hair brown to accommodate our friend.  if it really is a issue you should tell them.  We knew our friend wouldn't have got over it and obvs wanted to make her happy and stress free!!

    hope that helps xx

  • VicNVicN Posts: 1,352

    I think you're being unreasonable - she can do what she likes with her own hair, your wedding doesn't rule her life! 


  • JulyBugJulyBug Posts: 420

    I have never, ever thought about a bridesmaid hair colour and whether it went with a dress. I think you're worrying overly plus I REALLY don't think you can tell your bridesmaid what to do with their hair because of the one day of your wedding. I sympathise and understand your concerns but I don't think there is anything you can (or should) do and I'm sure they will look beautiful!

  • Mrs CashMrs Cash Posts: 209

    I think I'm just going it have to deal with it until they have their fitting next month. It might look fine and I'm stressing for the sake of stressing, if it does look terrible then she is the sort of girl to see this and want to do something about it, she hates looking bad.

    I dont want to control what colour she has her hair, however when she got married a few years ago and I was her BM, I completely did whatever she wanted and was conscious of the big day with what I was doing in the lead up. Ive been extremely laid back, kinda wishing I was a bit more bridezilla!! Lol

    in the grand scheme of the big day, her hair is actually quite insignificant but it seems I'm so well planned and organised that I don't have anything more important to worry about...........

    long and short of it is, I'll deal with it!!!

  • MrsWPtobeMrsWPtobe Posts: 435

    One of my bridesmaids has what we refer to as "unicorn rainbow hair" lol its pink, green, blue and purple, she also has half of her hair shaved and is planning on putting patterns in it. She's covered in tattoos and has piercings all over her face!! I'm very conservative lol have never dyed my hair and have no tattoo's. My colour scheme is lemon yellow and white lace...the way I look at is I chose her to be my bridesmaid because she is my friend and I lover her, as much as its not necessarily going to look traditional or story book in the pictures I genuinely couldn't have gotten through the past 12 months without her and that's why I want her by my side on my wedding day. Dont stress about it, it will probably have faded by your wedding day anyway and as other people have said, in the grand scheme of things its not important,  people will be looking at you and how beautiful you look anyway hun! Xx

  • MrsJCMrsJC Posts: 2,204

    Look at it this way - if her hair had been red all along, would that have changed your decision to ask her to be a bridesmaid? And would you have really chosen your colour scheme on the basis of her hair? Perhaps you would have made different decisions, but I would guess probably not.

    As it happens, green on red heads is a classic combination - think how many red heads have green eyes! And they look fabulous in green dresses. If you don't believe me, just search google images for 'red hair green dress', and you'll see what I mean. I think it'll look fantastic.

  • Little JulesLittle Jules Posts: 1,538

    I don't think you can tell your BMs what they can and cant do in terms of hair or anything else. But, I wouldn't worry about it, make sure she tries on the dress again soon, if she doesn't think it works with her hair, she'll dye it again - she will want to look good!

  • Jomc11Jomc11 Posts: 484

    Just have to let it be, on the day you will not pay 1 bit of attention to the colour of her hair & not in a bad way but it just wont be important

  • Miaow8690Miaow8690 Posts: 298

    If it helps, I am a natural redhead and my favourite colour is teal - so many of my clothes are teal because it actually goes really well. Stop stressing! I think it will all seem like nothing in a day or two. Plus, as MrsJC says - her hair colour wouldn't have stopped you asking her to be a BM in the first place, so why should it change things now?

  • Mrs CashMrs Cash Posts: 209

    I've stopped stressing now image Mainly because there has been too many non wedding related dramas! I actually picked the colour of the dress as it suited them both so well, before that happened I was open to what colour theme we had. Ive googled redheads in teal and it does look fine, I dont think it's going to be an issue after all, I was just being dramatic! Thanks ladies xx

  • Nat 1479Nat 1479 Posts: 145

    I'm with Miaow 8690 - I'm a readhead and teal is one of my favourite colours!!! I think it goes really nice ! 

  • It will be fine.. my bridesmaid had BLUE hair until 2 days ago!! thank god she's dyed it as it really would have looked daft with her lilac dress lol x

  • TerrensTerrens Posts: 6

    It will be extraordinary and everyone will definitely remember the style

  • MrsWPtobeMrsWPtobe Posts: 435


  • Mrs CashMrs Cash Posts: 209

    Oh no! You might love her but is this really necessary?! Mine has decided to go a darker red, which she's done before and I loved it on her. I've had plenty more dramas since to be worried about her hair now anyway image Lol Xx

  • MrsWPtobeMrsWPtobe Posts: 435

    Lol this is my most recent issue! I just feel a bit put out as I know it's going to really draw attention, its my mum who's hit the roof more than me though! Whilst I know its her choice and her hair and I love her for being so brave to do it, I don't know what to do, £80 dress, £40 bouquet, £20 shoes...topped off with neon hair. I just worry that its going to be the focus ( I come from a very conservative set of people/guests!) When I'm walking down the aisle and not me. I'm not one for being precious or self absorbed but I just wanted a few minutes to be about me! Lol xx

  • TerrensTerrens Posts: 6

    neon hair?! wow! even don't know what to say

  • Mrs CashMrs Cash Posts: 209

    I completely get where youre coming from. of course you want the focus to be on you it's your wedding day. The last thing you want is for your day to be remembered for something like neon hair on a bridesmaid. it's hard as you can't expect the bridemaids life to revolve around a wedding day but I'm sure there must be bridemaid etiquette, there's etiquette for everything else in a blooming wedding!!!! 

  • Simone7Simone7 Posts: 1

    This site covers everything you need!


  • MrsWPtobeMrsWPtobe Posts: 435

    Definitely doesn't have what i need on that site Simone7!! 

    There has to be bridesmaid etiquette! I don't include bridesmaids getting pregnant in etiquette, as to me, that's lovely! But drastic hair, face, tattoo, piercing etc, if someone asked me to be a bridesmaid, had chosen and paid for the dress, shoes, a hairdresser, headpiece, jewellery, a bouquet of flowers and make up artist, i wouldn't then shave my head , or get a facial piercing or something. I would want to be as pretty as possible for the brides forever pictures! 


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