Any advice/tips from brides who have already had their big day?

Hi Michelle,

I can give you loads of tips for things you just dont realise until after the wedding...

All the little things you think are important (matching colours, centre peices, baskets for order of service, what you'll wear in the morning!) and stress you out prior to the wedding, really dont matter on the day.

The journey from the church to the reception is probably the only bit of time you'll get to spend with your hubby for the entire day, the rest of it you'll be mingling and chatting with everyone but him/her. The day really does fly by so enjoy every minute.

Go with the flow, if something goes wrong, dont worry about it. As long as you both turn up who cares if aunty margaret gets beef when really she ordered lamb!!

You'll hardly eat/drink anything all day. Order yourselves a bottle of champers and have a stash of snacks for when you get back to your room. You'll both be knackered, but after re-aqainting yourselves as husband and wife image you'll be starving a ready for a drink!

Spend as much as you can afford on a photographer. Photos are all you'll have left to show for the wedding after the event and in hindsight I would definately have hired a videography for the ceremony. We decided against it beforehand, but afterwards really regretted it.

I could probably go on and on, if I havent already image

Mrs M x


  • Weddin crazyWeddin crazy Posts: 1,743

    Some great tips, think I'm going to enjoy this thread!

  • Yes, with 4 weeks to go I will be watching this with interest!


  • Aww thank you Mrs M for some brilliant tips - they are such a help and I really appreciate your reply.  I will take them on all boardimage xx

  • Debs270613Debs270613 Posts: 225

    As princess umpalumpa says, don't sweat the small stuff. It really doesn't matter on the day. Enjoy every second. I found that once I was at the ceremony venue, the rest of the day whzzed by. Your first dance is again one of the few moments do your utmost to cherish and enjoy the moment. 

    Also, ask someone close to hold some pressed powder and tissue as (it was hot!) sweaty and emotional needs tidying up along the way image 

    have a fabulous day xxxxxx

  • Only 17 days away from my wedding day....any other hints and tips?

  • Ok girls. The small stuff really doesn't matter. In fact you won't notice as you'll be having a fab time. My friend went home to breast feed her baby. She was gone two hours. I didn't notice. My nephews waistcoat and shirt were too small. Slater menswear swapped it at the church before I arrived (they drove over themselves)! Bad things will happen but they will get fixed. 

    My mum burnt the bottom of her dress on the iron. She was distraught. Nobody noticed or rather nobody looked at her funny.

    My dress was filthy once I left the church - it doesn't show on pictures. Neither does sweat!

    things I wish I'd done. 

    got a photo with my mum once I had my dress on

    given my camera to a friend so she could take guest style pictures with me in them and looking at the camera. We have lovely professional ones, but I wish I had ones of me just doing normal poses with friends instead of weddingy poses or candid oones 

    oh when you cut the cake or sign the register, try to both look in the same direction and at the same camera so you have at least one good photo 

    erm, I didn't eat much because I wasn't hungry but by midnight I was STARVING

    my friend filmed our dance and emailed it to us on our honeymoon. It was great as we won't get our video for ages.

    dont feel guilty if you don't get round everyone. They will come to you. 

    People are grown ups and will look after themselves. If its too hot, they will go outside. If they don't like their food, they will bother the waitress not you. If they can't find something, they will ask. 

    This is the only day you can get away with doing what you want. I decided to do a speech at the last minute ie before they gave my dad the microphone. And I'm so glad I did. if on the day you think that you want to do/say something, just do it. It will be fine, your guests won't know what was planned and what wasn't. 

    Have a great time!  xxx



    We stopped off at home after the church to cool down, and seized a photo op! 

  • Aww thank you for those top tips Mrs Rocky - such a help!  9 days and counting for me, got the butterflies eekimage.  You both look gorgeous btw! x

  • Carly57Carly57 Posts: 682

    Hi ladies,

    While I fully agree about not worrying about all those little details because you won't care... you have been worrying about little details for months now so make a list of them! Have a list of everything decor-wise and where it should go so that you can tick it all off when putting it in the car (I've heard so many people say they've found stuff in cupboards that they forgot they had bought!) and delivering it to the venue. This was my bible when I was decorating one room and h2b the other with bridesmaid and best man running inbetween and making sure we didn't see each other! We couldn't get in until 9.30am so I made sure all stressing was done in advance when writing the list, then I could calmly work through it on the day.

    I second the tip about coordinating which camera you're looking at, if the photographer was there we always went with that one (we'd paid for those pics!) but there's a photo of me and 3 friends , each of their other halfs took a pic on their camera and we're all looking in different directions!

    If you're giving out gifts during the speeches, plan how - I stowed the gifts in the corner behind the top table but when everyone had sat down and i was in a big dress, getting to them proved trickey!

    As soon as I started walking down the aisle, I only had eyes for my h2b, it was all that counted at that moment but it meant i didn't see everyone else. The regsitrar instructed us to stand facing the 'audience' during the readings and it was so good to have a few minutes to take notice of everyone and also of the surroundings.

    Don't forget the confetti shot, it makes for beautiful pictures and even though we had provided confetti, we almost forgot to have it handed out - particularly as you leave the ceremony room before everyone else... we went back in and came out after everyone was poised with their hand ful of petals!

    If you're having the ceremony and reception at the same place, go for a wander with your new husband - you get the chance to take stock of being married and the photographer can take some natural pics.

    If you want to do a photo for thank you cards with a thank you prop (we used mini chalk board signs), remember to get it done, its something that can be easily forgotten.

    That's all I can think of for now image


  • Brilliant tips Carly57 - so nice of you ladies to share these....8 days for me now eek!! x

  • Susie3Susie3 Posts: 21

    This is a really good thread, and thanks to all newly weds for taking the time to put up the tips!

    I've another few weeks to go, but will be following this thread closely image

    Our ceremony time is 2.30pm, and we were thinking of maybe getting our couple and family photographs done beforehand - what do ye think?  Sadly we dont have any parents left between us so had planned on walking down the aisle together.  Though I'm not actually sure how that will work - do you also pair bridesmaids up with groomsmen and send them up ahead of you or what? 

    My thinking behind getting photos done beforehand is (a) we don't feel a need to wait until the altar before seeing each other and (b) it should hopefully allow us a bit more time after the ceremony to join in on the drinks reception.  I know there will still be a few snaps to be taken after the ceremony but hoping to have the bulk of them taken around 12.30 or so (plus, make up will be fresher then too eh?!)

    My main concern is around the timing of everything - how long between ceremony & dinner call? 

    Speeches before/during/after dinner?

    How much of a break between finishing the meal and the band starting?

    When to break for evening food?

    These are the things that keep me awake at night! 


    Also, we are hoping to have a photo booth as we've been at weddings that had them and always enjoy them........but I'm a teeny bit concerned that our guests are mostly 40+ so I'm hoping to persuade my bossy bridesmaid to push (I mean encourage image ) the aunties and uncles in to it!  We're paying a set fee for it anyway, so the more strips of photos we can get out of it the better value it works out at for us.



  • ZzyzxZzyzx Posts: 4

    Don't worry about the weather! If you'd have told me in advance what the weather would be like on my wedding day, I would have been gutted! It was torrential rain in the morning with thunder and everything - it did slow down for photos, but rained on and off all day. Honestly, it didn't ruin anything. I really wanted to use the outdoor space at our venue, and we still did. Immediately after the ceremony our photographer walked us outside - I stood there with my train wondering whether to try and keep it dry, but in the end I just went for it. Guests commented how carefree I was with my dress and it got SOAKED around the bottom and was filthy, but you really can't tell in the photos and I'm just glad I enjoyed myself.

    It is true that you won't eat or drink much - I LOVE food and thought I would be an exception to this, but with all the adrenaline and excitement (and the fit of my dress around my stomach!) I really didn't eat much at all.

    Depending on numbers, it is possible to speak to all of your guests AND spend time with your new husband. We had around 50 guests and this was more than possible.

    Get a live band. If it's at all possible/ affordable and you like live music, this will be one of the best wedding decisions you make. All of our guests commented on our band - they were so much fun and got everyone up dancing.

    Finally, it WILL be the best day of your life. Enjoy it a lot.

  • I agree about the not worrying about your dress. My seamstress told me that I should be carefree- I only get to wear it once and it never shows up in the photos and as soon as I had that attitude it was much better. You will regret it if you spend the whole day on the edge of the group, holding your dress up and feeling a bit nervous rather than just doing whatever.

    Relax. I really didnt think I would do this as I thought I would be worrying about what was happening next and what time it was etc but I didnt care. I just focused on my new husband and made sure that we had a great time. We ended up over running when I had spent the whole time before the wedding worried that we would be sat twiddling our thumbs in between bits. 

    Take time to go away just the two of you. Even if its a 5 min sneaky kiss outside before you get announced into your reception. The time when it was just me and my new husband was most enjoyable for me. Neither of us were talking to others or busy posing for cameras we just were us for those few minutes.

    Dance. I am a dancer, but I still spent nearly half of the disco part going off to talk to people and ended up not dancing as much as I could have.

    If you have a corseted dress like me then make sure you take 5 minutes to go an cool down and breathe. I got so hot and dizzy at one point from being so tightly laced in and that could have easily ruined my night!!

    And finally its true- you wont eat much! If you have a sweet buffet or similar make sure you get some and put them aside for later/the next day. I ended up losing my bag of designated sweets and missed out on some good ones!!

    Aaaah I loved my wedding, it was just amazing and no matter what happens- rain, thunder, dress disasters, decoration disasters, light or music disasters, none of it will matter at all. As long as you and your hubby both turn up and say the right words that is all that counts! image

  • Weddin crazyWeddin crazy Posts: 1,743

    Aw, that's i really lovely sweet post. Thanks for sharing image 

  • MrsSabsMrsSabs Posts: 560

    Our weding is a little way off but I have helped organise and been bridesmaid a few times.  I still don't think I will be prepared for our wedding day...I wish we could have a full dress rehearsal!  But that's the old Stage Manager coming out!

    One thing I can pass on is that no matter what time of day the ceremony, the last hour before will disappear in seconds!  Be prepared for that!

  • I've been married for 20 days now, just wanted to add some things that maybe will help x

    Everyone noticed the little details apart from me, so I do think all the stressing is worth it, I had striped straws and personalised cocktail stirrers that I didn't thing would get used but was really suprised the next day whnerve collected our things that nearly all of them were gone. A lot of our guests kept all the little things, such as the name card, confetti bags, cocktail stirrers, scratch card holders and took them home, mil is making a collage using them.

    I had a strapless corset dress and by the wedding breakfast I had to go and take my bra off because it was really annoying me. I would suggest trying to wear your dress without a bra it's soooo much comfier. When sitting down if you have large boobs check they are in place lol, when I got my photos back my boobs are squashed up and I hate the pictures of them wear I'm sitting down.

    I was worried out going for a wee in my dress but I found it really easy even tho my dress was quite big, just straddle the toilet the wrong way round lol.

    I ate all of my wedding breakfast but didn't touch any food on the evening, I was so full from the meal, I wish I had tried it tho cos can't say whether it was any good or not.

    Me and h2b went to our room during the turn around to have some time together and try and get some sleep lol it didn't happen but was nice to just take a break and chill out before the party started.

    Wear your shoes in!! I forgot and only started wearing them in 2 days before the wedding, I changed out of my wedding shoes just after the ceremony and spent the rest of the day in flats.

    Have some sort of entertainment for the evening, a lot of our guests didn't get up on the dance floor until later on during the night, luckily we had a magician who was amazing and kept everyone entertained, if we didn't have him I would have been a bit worried that they weren't enjoying themselves, something fthey our guests to do is always a good idea.

    Take some spare favours just in case, especially of you are giving them to evening guests we had one cousin turn up with his girlfriend who wasn't invited and we weren't told she was coming, luckily we had a spare favour so she didn't fell left out.

  • nenjennenjen Posts: 1,524

    If you have a corset back dress, put it on at least an hour before you leave the house - the fabric will warm up and will loosen and you will need to tighten it! I forgot and had to get my mum to re-do mine after the ceremony. My dress was gaping a bit when we were signing the register!

    Make time to be alone with your new husband. We decide to sneak off just after our first dance and spent half an hour in our room having a glass of champagne and having a little bit of "us" time. It means so much to me now being able to look back at that special time.

    Be strict with your photographer. I got fed up of having my photo taken and just wanted to be with my guests, luckily by this time he'd already taken all of the photos I'd listed before hand but I can imagine it could be hard to say that you've had enough.

    Don't worry about your dress getting dirty. Some of our favourite photos were taken on grass and down muddy pathways. A good dry cleaner will be able to get the stains out.

    I'm sure I could think of hundreds more things but that'll do for now!

  • wenlockwenlock Posts: 103

    I think like everyone said, you won't notice all the small things that go wrong on the day.  Try not to micromanage the men - they will sort themselves out and it's not your job to check everything.  We picked up the kilts a whole week before the wedding, and I suggested to my fiance that he checked all the components were in each one.  He didn't, and neither did his dad, so about half an hour before the ceremony my brothers were driving around trying to find a place that sold long socks!  Thankfully I was in my room getting ready and blissfully unaware!

    I think my main advice would be to make yourself eat some breakfast and lunch, because it's too easily forgotten in all the excitement.  I didn't feel hungry for about two weeks before the wedding (very unusual for me!) and I actually lost 3 or 4 pounds in the run up!  On the day I forced myself to eat a bit of breakfast and lunch.  I ate about half of my wedding breakfast and a little bit in the evening.  At least I got to try everything!

    The other thing I did which was good was to stay at the venue the night before the wedding.  I went to my room at 9pm so I could get some quiet time away from excited relatives and friends.  It was good to just reflect a little and much easier to sleep when I wasn't worried about waking up anyone else in the house!

    I loved that my dress wasn't too big or heavy and easy to walk around in, and my veil was fingertip length so I could wear it pretty much all day (did take it off for dancing though).  Get some gel inserts for your shoes.

    There were small details that I would probably have changed - like get the hairdresser to put more hairspray in my hair, and I would have dyed my roots a bit closer to the day rather than a week before.  But looking at my photos, none of that really matters because we both just look so happy, and that's the thing that really shines out.

    Oh and the last thing I would have done is put a vase or beer glass out for mine and the bridesmaids bouquets, as we had quite delicate flowers and they were wilting after a few hours.  I think this is probably not a concern for most people who choose more typical flowers though.





  • wenlockwenlock Posts: 103

    Oh, and the one thing I bought which was a bit pointless in the end was garden games.  The venue never put them out, and we were absorbed in photos/talking to guests so forgot all about them.

    One thing we had seriously considered before the wedding was getting a bouncy castle because we had about 10 children.  I'm so glad we didn't do it because it would have been a total waste of money.  The kids were more than happy just running around, and the party bags we put out for them were a big hit.

  • Im loving this thread, thank you to you all for passing on your tips, it's great to hear them 

    our reception is across the road from our church (very convenient for cold november) and we have booked a beautiful car, the driver said he would have a bottle of champagne for me & H2b and after the ceremony and before we go off to the reception he will take us for a drive around and a drink to celebrate, I thought this was silly at first but from your messages I think this might turn out to be my favourite part of the day, just me and my new husband!! Hehe


  • Thanks for all the tips ladies . Ive put a few of them in my phone alerts to remind me on the day image

     A tip i read somewhere and have saved is to spray perfume on the petticoats / layers under your dress . It will smell lovely as you walk down the aisle . ( aplogies if ive read it on one of these posts - ive read it in stages ) x

  • Bump! I'm compiling a list! image

  • Yes we need some more helpful tips pleeeeeeese xx


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