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4th August Vintage, mismatch, DIY, crafty and hearty wedding

n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

Well I know some of you have really wanted me to do a wedding report so I will provide you with one, I've not had my professional pictures yet, so will relie on friends and families and my own.

How it all started....

In 2007 I started my PGCE course and didn't care where I went to teach Art, I just wanted to teach, so in April 2008 I started my search. I went to interview after interview and nerves kept getting in the way. But finally I go for an interview in a school in Luton. I get to the school nice and early, I get to the door just as there is a big "SMASH" someone has a car go into the back of them. I continue inside and sit down and wait and wait. Finally wondering what is going on outside I listened into the receptionist conversation as some of you have guessed by now the person who had the guy crash into them was the person who was doing my interview! Oh well no job for me! So I go through the interview process, completely relaxed having a bit of a laugh and leave not expecting a job offer, I drive off back to swansea getting to just outside Alyesbury get a phone call, "we want to offer you the job"! So I have to move to a whole new place in the next 4 months!

So in August 2008 I finally move in with a girl in Dunstable I found on findaflatmate.com (this would later be a big mistake!). I moved in and everything was good, but my work collegues and flatmate was concerned that as I didn't know anyone I should do somethings to try and get to know people, so I joined a salsa club and made a few friends but I also joined an online dating website. I went on a load of dates there is no lie about that, I must of gone on at least 20 and most were weirdos, up themselves, etc in one case one dated my flatmate! Had to keep that quiet! I decided that I was going to give it a rest for a bit and then try again in a few months. But I got this one simple message just saying "Hi, how are you?".

And that is where this all began. He looked ok, he had potential so I thought this is the last one, give him a chance and see what happens. So we talked on the dating site for 3 weeks, then msn/ facebooked and texted eachother for another 2. Then the big question "Do you want to meet up?" He was in Cobham, Surrey, I was in Dunstable, Bedfordshire. What do we do? Well as it turned out i'm the more confident driver out of the two so I drove down to him, as long as he paid for the parking and the date, he agreed.

I got to Cobham on the 7th of February, and there was this 6'4, dark former rugby player guy waiting by the car park with an all day ticket in his hand. I park my car up and this very yorkshire "hello" pops through the window. We went for a lovely walk around Cobham and we got excited at seeing all the supercars coming through and he was impressed with my knowledge of wildlife and farm animals. He takes me to the cricketers pub and we spend the next 7 hours there just chatting, laughing and time just flew by.

I got introduced to his friends back at his flat as I really needed the loo after the loooonnngggg walk. They made me really at home, hot chocolate and homemade shortbread biscuits it was a perfect date. He then called me the following morning to make sure I was ok on the drive home cause the snow came down as I travelled home. Well while on the phone we arranged our next date, Saturday 14th February, S**T! I've never had a date on valentines day! So quick thinking, he likes animals, he likes food and rugby, trip to whipsnade, i'll cook dinner and we will watch wales verse england six nations.

 

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  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    Sorry went and got some take away.

    Right so the weirdness kicks in... not my husband but my flatmate. This lead to us taking a big leap.

    We've been dating 4 months and my flatmate started copying everything, she got her hair cut and coloured like mine, she brought the same clothes as me (including underwear), she started wearing my clothes (she was a size 18, i'm a size 14), she developed the same allegies as me and things got stranger and stranger, my friends from uni were over to meet Neil (husband) for first time and they were shocked at how much my flatmate was putting me down and flirting with Neil.

    Neil was made redundant in June, and luckily found a job in Milton Keynes within 2 weeks, but it meant driving from Cobham to Milton Keynes almost 4 hours of his day on the road. He would stay over on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday Night to save petrol but the weirdness and flirting started to freak him out. So with the weirdness of my flatmate and his driving costs/ time we decided to move in with each.

    So only after 6 months of dating we moved into our lovely house in Leighton Buzzard.

    We became famous in our group of friends for our entertainment, food and laughs.

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    The proposal....

    I've been a huge fan of Seth Lakeman, have been for years, and every time he was touring either he was sold out, not near by, or something school related was on and in one case friend was in hospital, so there was no way i was missing his preformance in St Albans on 3rd March 2009.

    So Neil picked me up and we made our way to St Albans, it was a lovely evening, we walked from the car park in the cathedral park to the city centre and we had a meal, I danced away in my seat to Seth Lakeman, while Neil laughed at my bad dancing!

    It was midnight and cold. The stars were out, not one person was around and we walked through the cathedral park next to the duck ponds singing Seth Lakeman songs and I was trying to freak neil out making pyscho and alien noises and trying to freak him out even more each time a duck quacked. We got to this little bridge that goes over the pond and Neil grabs me and starts murrering something about how we've been together etc and I'm starting to look at him with a puzzled look on my face.

    He stops talking and asks why I look worried.

    I proptly burst into tears and sob... "are you dumping me?"

    "No you dafty, i'm trying to propose to you!"

    "WHAT!"  tears stop at this point,

    "well it's to late now, you've ruined it!" he starts to walk off.

    "No you haven't, say it again!" me grabbing him back to the centre of the bridge.

    "I love you, will you marry me?"

    "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

    Big huge kiss, cuddle like that from a second world war movie and we run back to the car laughing.

    As you may of noticed no ring, he did it in the heat of the moment, as he didn't think he would get an opportunity like that again, and we could get a ring on the weekend.

    image

     

     Now being an Art Teacher who gets very hands on with the materials and equipment, I have a tendance to forget jewellery on my hands and wrists, so constantly have to chip bits of plaster, modroc, clay, gloop etc off of jewellery so I didn't want anything fancy, anything big and didn't want anything to costly, so we went around all the jewellery shops and just didn't like any of the rings on sale, on the way home from the supermarket theres a little second hand jewellery shop and I look and see this little ring on display it was perfect just what I wanted and even better it was just £99.

    Bargain especially as when I got it redipped in june this year it was valued at £500!

    So I was able to start telling everyone first of my pupils in my class. They were lovely they threw me an engagement party in one of the Art rooms.

     

     

  • jayellekayjayellekay Posts: 793
    Can't wait to read more!
  • nats2013nats2013 Posts: 6,253

    cant wait for these pictures!!!

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    So after telling all my friends and close family the planning begins. I'll also tell you tips for surviving family and friend issues, cause trust me i've had them all.

    The section most of you are waiting for...

    The planning begins..

    We gave ourselves a couple of weeks to enjoy the engagement, then my OCD to organise started to kick in. We needed to start working out a budget, we realised that we would need 2 years at least to save enough, being a teacher I couldn't do anytime during the school term and me and Neil needed a 2 week honeymoon because we just did not get to have a holiday while we were dating, plus we wouldn't be able to have one while we were saving for a wedding so it had to be in the summer holidays. Which left us either 4th August 2012 or 11th August 2012 and we really know that my brother would not appreciate having our wedding on his birthday (the 11th) so we decided the date 4th August 2012, 2 and a half years, what a wait it would be!

  • JoeyClareJoeyClare Posts: 2,737

    Welcome back Rose! Soooo been looking forward to your report! image xx

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    So where to get married...

    I'm an army child and have lived all over, Brunei, Hong Kong, Detmold (germany), Berlin, Suffolk, Aberystwyth, Swansea, Newport, King Stanley (near Stroud), Dunstable, Leighton Buzzard. But I couldn't really call these places home. Only one place has felt like home everytime I visited it. My husband to be village, Grassington in the Yorkshire Dales. Everytime we went up there and went into one of the pubs we were meet with a hug, hand shake, and a drink in our hands. We can walk through the village and bump into so many friends that it could take an hour just walking 500 yards to the pub from the house.

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  • TheNewMrsCTheNewMrsC Posts: 558

    So glad you've decided to do a report, loving it all so far! image x

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    It had to be a church, no question about it, i'm religious and could not image it any other way, hense another reason we choose Neils home village, choosing any of my parishes I lived in would of been difficult. But when Neil took me to the church it felt so right and so perfect.

    You go down from the village, cross over this amazing stone bridge then head down this single lane track for about a mile passing fields of sheep and small former farm hand cottages till you come to the very end of the lane and you see this small church dating back from the 5th century. All you can hear is the sky larks, lapwings, curlews and swallows singing, the sheep bleeting the belted galloway cattle calling and the river wharfe rushing past the weir and the stepping stones.

    It was perfect and what made it more perfect, Neils past 11 generations are buried in the graveyard, he went to sunday school with his bestmans wife there when he was small and almost every single member of the generation before his have been married and his generation have all be christened there. So we would be the first of this generation to be married there.

    So it was decided we had to be married at St Micheals and all Angels, Linton Falls.

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     As you can see in thispicture just how remote the church is, there is only a couple of church warden houses and a farm house.

    Only one problem occured straight away with us planning it in Yorkshire... my MOTHER! (you will see this becoming a pattern through out the report!)

    She hated the fact I was planning to get married in Yorkshire and even worse that I should be marrying a Yorkshire man, apparently Yorkshire is overrated and you can't trust people from Yorkshire, can you tell where my father was from? image

    Anyway she got me upset and I realised with the help on my husband to be that his is what I wanted and we continued with the planning. We went to the vicar and booked 2pm on Saturday 4th August 2012. Next was the venue. But this would have to wait will we could pop up in the Easter Holidays.

     

     

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    Now anyone from the Yorkshire Dales can tell you there is a real shortage of reception venues within a short distance of the rural churches of the Yorkshire Dales.

    We were going to have to trek a small distance to get a reception we wanted that was within our budget, was want we wanted and suitable for the numbers we wanted.

    So the list of reception choices got smaller and smaller.

    So here are the choices-

    1) Broughton Hall- We loved the place because well it looked amazing, but they were uninterested when we made an enquiry and we were really put off how unprofessional, lack of knowledge and lack of preparation they gave when we made an enquiry.

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     2) Craiglands Hotel, Ilkley- We loved this one, It was our runner up, it had a beautiful garden room but what put us off was that they would hold 2 weddings there at a time.

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     3) The Priests House- It was lovely but for the numbers at the time we would of needed a marque and anyone in Yorkshire knows you really can't trust the summers for it being wet or dry. So we really didn't want to risk it but it is lovely.

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     4) The Calfs Head- We loved this place, but at the time of planning we thought we would have to many people coming so have to vote it out on numbers. But we really loved it.

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     5) Coinston Hotel- Went for an open day, liked it but had to pay extra to use the lake, but they advertised within our budget, but they then gave us a quote back with so many extras added on it was £2,500 over our budget.

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    These were the ones we looked at as options, but others we didn't look at also included the Rendevue, Skipton, The Swan Hotel, Harrogate, The Mill Stone, near Harrogate.

    But it wasn't till the last one we saw that we realised it was the one,

    6) Stirk House Hotel, Gisburn. It was perect it had a long drive up to it, had a huge garden with lots of different areas for photos, it had a lounge area with a fire place, leather and fabric settees and arm chairs. The ball room didn't have the big windows looking out onto the garden I would of liked but the 1920's style sky light gave a beautiful glow to the room. It was in budget and would let us do what we wanted. Perfect we found our venue!

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     from the front.

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     the side view

     

  • pink-llamapink-llama Posts: 435

    Good to have you back n_e_rose image

    Been looking forward to getting to read your report! Loving it so far, and can't wait to read more! image

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    what to apologise for any spelling errors in advance, i'm dyslexic and really struggling with long written sections. Also it doesn't help that for some reason the O,M,N,L,I buttons don't always work on here for some reason! arghhhh!!!

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    other pictures of the reception...

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     the lounge area, including fireplace

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     the ball room set up for a previous wedding, the curtain is now black much nicer than the gold.

     

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    what to apologise for any spelling errors in advance, i'm dyslexic and really struggling with long written sections. Also it doesn't help that for some reason the O,M,N,L,I buttons don't always work on here for some reason! arghhhh!!!

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    other pictures of the reception...

    image

     the lounge area, including fireplace

    image

     the ball room set up for a previous wedding, the curtain is now black much nicer than the gold.

     

  • Aww Yay!


    Love your proposal.. I know St Albans park so well.. what a perfect place to propse!! image

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    Right so venue choosen, church choosen. Where to go next decide on colour.

    Red, yellow and orange are out, I hate red and really don't suit yellow and orange.

    Couldn't have purple as that was a friends (one of my bridesmaids) colour.

    Blue would of been nice but just didn't feel right for me.

    I then liked the idea of dusky pink but someone (no names mentioned) said he would not wear pink! ( i got a bit of pink on him!)

    But he said I could have a pink anywhere else just not on him.

    So I suggested Greens to which he agreed he liked so Green it was, but being an art teacher colours work best in pairs or trios. So i really need to find something that worked well with the greens, and what shade of green etc etc.

    Sometimes being an Art teacher is a curse!

    So here is my colour palette we decided mix and match greens, biege/latte, dusky pink.

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     eil de nil

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     sage green

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     eucalyptus green (silverly green leaves)

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     biege

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     latte

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     My little bit of dusky pink (only allowed a little!)

  • MrsR4evaMrsR4eva Posts: 1,246

    Fan Bloody Tastic !! been waiting for your report N e Rose , cant wait to see your photos hope you had a fantastic day .. Wow didnt that come round quickly

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    Budget wise, me and Neil had a tight budget we were paying for everything ourselves initally so we budgeted £10,000 to maximum £12,000 innitally mad I know, but when Neil has a family the size of a small country and you don't invite one set of cousins or their partners its like hells doors have just opened so hense the budget.

    So this was our budget- I've put actual total for the item/s as the second figure.

    My Ring- £450 - £425

    His Ring- £250 - £225

    My Dress- £800 - £850

    My Shoes- £50 - £25 - Ebay

    Accessories- £50 - £8 - Made

    Underwear- £100 - £25- January Sales

    Jewellery- £50 - £20 - Made

    Suits- £500 - £550

    Grooms Shoes- £50 - £7- Ebay

    Church- £450 - £420

    Reception- £5,500 - £5,178.66p - In laws paid for extra bottles of wine on the tables

    Chair covers- £500- £360

    Band/ DJ- £800 - £880

    Photographer- £800 - Dad paid for as a gift to us.

    Videographer- £800 - £880

    Cake- Making

    Favours- £100 - £40- Made

    Flowers- £800 - £625

    Transport- £350 - £320

    Honeymoon- £2,000 - £1,355- Changed what we did.

    Cake of Cheese- £400 - £320

    Bridesmaids- £800 - £620 - some advise for you when we get ot that bit!

    Bridesmaid Shoes- £100 - £44

    Flowergirl Dresses- £150 - £98

    Pageboy- £60 - £28

    Gifts- £200 - £50- made a load

    Insurance- £25 - £20

    Stationary- £100 - £60 (excluding ink cartridges and stamps, but thats a whole different story)

    Equipment/ DIY bits- £300 - about the same £300 but a lot is equipment I already had.

     

    I think that was my budget list, but I can always add more as needed. I wpread the costs out and i used many tricks to keep costs down.

    I brought equipment from school as pritt sticks are absolutely cheap, Indian Ink etc

    I saved all my tesco clubcard vouchers, as soon as we knew what we were doing for honeymoon we had to buy food for the self catering with loads of treats and lots of things for the wedding as you will see. So what came to £158 we got for £38!

    I joined a questionnaire/survey company and got amazon vouchers I got almost all my gifts for the bridal party and parents with these.

    I asked for vouchers for birthdays and christmas and this paid for clothes, make up and jewellery for the honeymoon. We also asked for money for christmas so we could buy a SAT NAV and digital Camera, we got enough to get both and a net book to help with downloading our pictures onto for the honeymoon.It's worth asking on birthdays and christmas, my birthday I got tickets for Rhod Gilbert show for while we were on honeymoon.

    Save your pennies- literally I put silvers and coppers away each week and this paid for the chair covers. I also put a purse in the kitchen about 2 months before the honeymoon to put silvers and pound coins in for paying for parking while on honeymoon.

    Buy bits within your food shop, we cut back on our unhealthy food but added to our shop little bits to put towards the wedding/ honeymoon, such as ingredients, favour items, etc.

    If I think of any more I'll add them as I go.

     

    I think that is it for today, tomorrow i'm traveling back from Yorkshire to home, so as soon as I'm back I'll start again, with the dress hunt!

     

  • Loving your report so far, congratulations xx
  • gemz1985gemz1985 Posts: 174
    Love your report so far can't wait to read more x
  • beesbees Posts: 835

    It all looks so lovely.

    We did the walk from Linton down to the Red Lion Pub at Burnsall yesterday, it is one of my favourite places and such an amazing place to get married. The church is beautiful.

  • Been looking forward to you writing your report you have so many great ideas! Cant wait for your wedding pics x

  • flossycat100flossycat100 Posts: 6,527 New bride

    Hi Rose! Congratulations and I look forward to reading more! Your colour scheme was similar to ours, yay image

     

  • HannikinsHannikins Posts: 1,046
    Ooo same colour scheme as me... I love it!!!!
  • Jennytay08Jennytay08 Posts: 693
    Really looking forward to reading the reSt so lovely so far image
  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    Ok I'm back home, back in normality but with a mountian of washing, glassware and cheese to sort through start that tomorrow after the MRI, bloody knee!

    The dress dilemma...

    Ok so I'm never comfortable in skirts or dresses, I'm a jeans and some kind of top person, I'm the type of person who could stay in her pj's all day if I can get away with it.

    My confidence was then knocked even more cause I asked my mum to come dress shopping "only if you get the dress in Wales, I'm not traveling all that way for your dress!" so that was a No! So that upset me, so I asked my bridesmaids none were able to come to any of the weekends, understandable 2 were out of the country but the others didn't show interest. I reaised pretty quickly I had to go dress shopping on my own, which really upset me and still is the only thing I regret. I really wish someone just came with me to give me confidence as I really needed it with a couple of shops.

    Anyway I had no idea what I wanted, straps, strapless, A Line, Straight, Tulle, Silk I literally had no idea! All I knew was I did not want a HUGE mergurine of a dress I literay would not be able to fit down the aisle of the church.

    So I looked on line first found a few that I quite liked. But one of my friends told me I should go and try some on to see what suited me. So I went to a shop in Tring, Herts which was lovely and found a dress I liked but wasn't sure...

     It was ok, but not really what I was looking for and cause i'm really pale White just made me look paler and washed out.

     

    I then tried another shop in woburn, they were lovely but because I had 18 months to go they weren't very interested. So I tried a few on and loved an amanda wyatt dress it was my favourite, but the shop convinced me to rebook an appointment in 6 months time to try it on again then they would order it if I still lived it. So I left a litte happy that I found a dress I liked but was stil unsure as they wanted me to wait to order it.

    I thought I better try a couple more shops just incase and as the other one wasn't that really interested thought I'll try the one in our town, I knocked on the door and told them I just want to look and try some on and the woman laughed said "your far to early, come back 6 months before your wedding then we can help", and slammed the door in my face. I promptely went home and cried, with the fact that one place showed no interest in me and this one making me a fool infront another bride and not one of my friends or family wanted to come or showed interest in coming dress shopping I just didn't want to enter another bridal shop again.

    Husband to the rescue...

    Neil saw how much I was upset with the previous experience he didn't know what to do other than to keep teling me I'm gorgeous etc. Then he read the loca Newspaper a bridal shop 5 minute walk from our house. The shop was Xquisite bridal and they said they were warm and friendly. So I summoned up the courage to go and have a look.

    I opened the door and this smiley, excited lady welcomed me in, I just wanted to look at the dresses. She picked up straight away that I was nervous while I was looking, she asked if I was alright and instantly burst into tears telling her how no one wanted to come with me, how the other shop treated me and how I hated being in a dress shop as my confidence was at rock bottom! Something snapped in Sabrina and she took me by the hand upstairs, sat me down and brought me loads of dresses up to try.

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    Each one was beautiful but it was either just not me or way out of the price range. The prices ranged from £800 to £2,500, my budget was £800 to maximun of £1,000, so I just smiled and went along with the trying on, get more and more upset that I'll have to get something online as I couldn't afford any of these dresses.

    As I was waiting for the next dress, Sabrina puts it away and gets the second last one out and starts putting it on. I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror. It was beautiful, it was simple enough with a little detail, not to big, showed off my curves I loved it. BUT, I look at the price tag, £1,875! Well out of my price range. My heart sinks again and I felt myself give up there and then. Sabrina then gets my attention with the following...

    "oh, this ones going in the sale next week"

    "really" said still pretty sure it was going to be well out of my price range.

    "yep, down to £850" my eyes light up, I can afford that!

    This coud be my dress, only problem was she would require half for the deposit within the week to take it off the shelf for me.

    I didn't have half, but before I even thought about putting deposit down I wanted a second opinion, and the ony persons opinion other than my h2b that matters to me is my dad, so I text him the information, the designer and the dress. Within minutes I get a phone call from my dad.

    "account number, sort code and the money will be in for the deposit within hours, get the dress! Its perfect!"

    I had my dress, finally after all the heart ache. Plus the designer was only stocked in 3 stores in Britain and since then no longer stocked in Britain. So it would be unique.

    SO this is what you what to see my bargain, perfect dress...

    image

     Rina de Montella- Silk ruched dress, lace detailing with crystal beading and sequins. Lace detail arounf the bust. Applique detail on the back and long trail, buttons on the back.

    I don't have a picture of me in the dress before the wedding, so your just going to have to wait! Oh I'm cruel!

     

  • n_e_rosen_e_rose Posts: 1,562

    Right accessories time... First DIY bits.

    I tried a tiara and I look stupid like a drag queen. So I thought I'll try a side tiara,

    I won one on ebay this I thought was nice...

     Big mistake, It look even more stupid on me! I hate my Hair!!!!!

    Finally I thought well if you can't buy one you will have to make one....First DIY project really I found a flower hairband, turned it into a slide and then added a brooch to the centre.

    It was perfect...

     

    I will do other accessories later on! Oh big dilemma that your going to go WHAT at trust me everyone else did!

  • Jennytay08Jennytay08 Posts: 693
    Looks like a gorgeous dress, can't wait to see the wedding day!
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