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Mixed religion marriage

I'm getting married next august and have confirmed full Nupual Mass in Catholic church. My partner and all his family are strict catholic and i have just converted myself. However my family are NOT! My gran is VERY anti-Catholic and the rest of my family will not join in the Mass. I'm worried it will cause a devide during the wedding and my family will feel pushed out. My parents are very happy for us and adore h2b and his family but I just think this will make them awkward. Anyone have a problem with mixed religion for the big day?


  • ansqui22ansqui22 Posts: 163
    I know all about this one! I'm christian and my h2b is muslim (respectful but not strict... hence with me!) and from afghanistan. His family won't be at our wedding because his brother is so opposed to us. It's really sad as his dad died a few years ago and travelled the world as an ambassador so we know he would have supported my hubby2bs decision. His mum did support us but she really sadly died just before we got engaged (well in fact the very day but he didn't know... hope not a sign) and now his brother says he is head of the family and we should not be together. In fact he threatened to cut him off from everything back home and found him another wife! Anyway, to cut a long story short, this all happend in the summer and we are just keeping our heads down at the moment and will tell them about the wedding jut beforehand so if by some miracle they did wish to come they could. It's even sadder as we know his sister is supportive but she cannot be seen to disagree with her brother as she is afghanistan with him.

    Our wedding is very exciting and will be so lovely but is also so sad as the numbers will be so uneven. We did consider having a smaller wedding but decided it seems unfair to cut my family out who love him just because of the situation. Instead we have opted for a civil ceremony in a hotel, just like he would have if in afghanistan and will add lots of touches to keep is family in our minds. I think I will also say a few words on his behalf about his parents who we know would have supported us as I know he will struggle to do this himself.

    Families hey! Who's have 'em!

  • Thats so sad, my thoughts are with you and h2b. I thought about getting married in a hotel to spare my family's feeling, but realised that its OUR day and because they love me, they should be there to support me. Hopefully it would work out ok, fingers crossed!

    I think your decidion is very wise and I hope the day goes well, hopefully your family will offer even happiness and love to get your h2b through the day without this family. At least you both know the way you're doing it is the way YOU really want things.

    I agree- families, who'd have 'em!
  • hey heather,

    I am probably going to a have a full mass for my Catholic marriage, but my brother just got married and had the Catholic wedding service because his wife isn't Catholic (she is Church of Scotland). It was absolutely lovely and still very holy and Catholicy but her family could join in with the prayers because their was no Creed etc and if there had been the Eucharist one side of the church would have been empty and one would have been full!

    I'm sure you've discussed that option but maybe you should give it some more thought-you have to find a compromise between your family and your H2B's family and surely that's perfect?

    It is sad when people are opinionated about others' choice of religion-when leaving the church my SIL's dad said "I like Catholics, just not Roman Catholics...." WTF????

    ansqui22 what a sad story! best of luck with your wedding. xx
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