Who pays for Best Man / Usher suits?
MrsMc9814
Posts: 422
Hi everyone!
I was wondering how you are all working out your budgets with regards to the men in your wedding party - are you paying for their suits or do they pay for themselves? We'll be paying for the bridesmaid dresses but h2b wants 4 Ushers as well as his Best Man - as well as his suit this is going to add up!! So who is paying for what with your weddings?
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I dont think there is any set rules regarding this to be fair, it all depends on individual budgets.
My Fiance is adamant he wants to pay in full for his 7 groomsmen inc my dad and his although I disagree and I think they should all hire their own.
The way I see it is like this.....will we be putting our hand in our pocket to buy our mums a nice wedding outfit too?.....no we wont so why should the men not pay for their own!!
Anybody invited to a special occasion is more than likely to go out and buy a new outfit, why should this be any different?
It will probably cause trouble when it comes time to pay!!
We are paying for all the Bridal party's outfits.
I have bought my BMs dresses and the Groom and his men are hiring suits which we are also paying for, we have 6 in total
Me and H2B recently went to a friends wedding where he was the 2nd best man and the groom asked if all bestmen/ushers would mind chipping in £30 towards suit hire, nobody objected.
We are paying the same amount to the mens outfits as we did to bridesmaids. Which leaves about £30 still to pay for the ushers, they were all surprised when we said we were paying anything, I don't think there is a 'rule' about this.
This is really interesting.
I've always assumed that the men in the bridal party pay for their own suit-hire and that was the norm. Obviously if you wanted them to purchase a brand new suit that would be different.
We are definitely not paying for our groomsmen! We've paid for our bridesmaids' dresses though so I suppose it's a little bit contradictory.........that being said, the girls are paying for shoes and accessories and hair & makeup (if they want it done professionally- it's up to them) which will cost more than the suit-hire. It's so much easier being a boy!
I guess, similarly to BM dresses, it comes down to a number of factors. Does your budget allow it? Who are the people in your bridal party? Did they pay for you if/ when you were in their bridal party?
Our fathers, my two brothers and my grandad would never allow us to pay for their suit hire. Not in a million years! The best man is married to one of the bridesmaids and also assumed he would be paying for his own suit. That being said, our main colour is quite unusual and so we ordered matching ties and pocket squares from Dessy for our fathers and the best man, costing us around £90.
we decided we couldn't afford to pay for all the men to have the same suit so will be asking them to wear a gray suit if they have one and a black suit if not.
H2Bs brothers are the best men and have decided they would like to hire the same suit as H2B so they will be paying as its their choice.
we've bought everyone matching ties 10 in all! which cost us around £90 in the debenhams sale
x
Our men (Ushers/best man and dads & Groom) are paying for their own suits just like the bridesmaids have paid for their dresses and accessories
We are giving them all a really nice thank you gift each
We have kept the budget tight and under £100 each. Wouldn't dream of asking them to pay any more!
Hope this helps xx
I think if you want them all matching, you should pay. We aren;t having matching suits, H2B and my dad are having new suits which they are buying themselves, H2B is having 3 best men, no ushers, and we've asked them to wear their own suits (one will be in a kilt) and I'm making them matching ties to go with the BM dress. I have paid for my BM whole outfit, I'm only having my sister, and also as I knew what shoes etc I wanted her to have I have paid.
We're asking them to wear a grey suit as their gift to us (best man has one anyway), and then we'll provide the shirts and ties.
If we wanted a specific look eg morning coat/tails, we would pay. As it is, we're not bothered about them matching, as the BMs won't be either, and we want a laid-back look.
We are doing similar to barbie_86, they are just being asked to wear a navy suit and white shirt, and their tie is their gift. I think its a bit different for men as they mostly have suits, or if they don't tend to be able to hire one relatively cheaply. My dad isn't going to be matching as I think he's part of my party not the grooms
Again, if you're being quite specific eg tuxedos then I suppose it's only fair you offer to contribute, as its not going to be something most men will own.
We're going to pay for the groomsmen's outfits, as we have paid for my bridesmaids' dresses. We wouldn't necessarily buy them a new suit, as that would cost a fortune, but we're happy to pay for the hire. I'm not really sure what the done thing is, to be honest, though whenever my fiancé has been an usher, the bride and groom have hired his suit for him x
We paid for the men's suits but not shoes and we paid for the bridesmaids dress, shoes and our flowergirl's dress, shoes - I think it's unfair to pay for bridemaids and not ushers and it either needs to be factored into your budget, or you ask all of them to contribute
We are paying for all the mens suits, including the dads even if they want to pay they have contributed enough. That means H2B has 8 suits to get, eekk! Hes found a good deal though, £650 the lot including shoes, cravats etc, they get to keep the shirt too lol. We have dressed the bridesmaids head to toe so it seems only right to do the same for the men.
You choose to get married, you choose the people in the wedding party so you foot the bill if you want to dictate what the party wears.
This is simply how we saw it at our wedding and this is how the other 5 weddings I have attended in the last 10 years.
However we have just come across an American tradition (yet another creeping in with the baby showers) that asks for the wedding party to buy a £200 suit for the usher which we cant stand. Just dropped in conversation like its a normal thing to ask.
Sadly they are family. Coincidentally he was an usher at our wedding and got a free suit 10 years ago that cost us £200 back then. They gave a gift of £40 at our wedding. Based on tit for tat they certainly wouldnt be getting a wedding gift as the money for that has gone on the suit 5 times over and as its a Friday wedding we will be expected to lose a days pay to attend. My hubby would prefer not to be an usher but the arguments we will face to say no will be immense and we are already in the dog house for saying we wont be bring our young children. The day is a black day on our calendar so we will be very glad when it is over!