Gifts for the wedding party - necessary expense?

What gifts did you/are you getting for your wedding party? By this I mean:

 

Your Bride/Groom

Bride Parents

Grooms Parent

Best man/s

Bridesmaid/s

Pageboy

Usher/s

 

We have already decided on the wedding favours and let's face it, weddings aren't cheap so I am reluctant to fork out even more for my wedding party when we are already paying for the whole day and their bridesmaids dresses/suits! Would love to know your feedback please because I would happily not get anything but don't know if that is frowned upon..

Posts

  • MrsCToBeeMrsCToBee Posts: 2,458 New bride

    I think it's expected that you buy them something, but you don't need to spend a fortune! Planning hens dos/stag dos etc does tend to cost quite a lot so it's a little token of your appreciation. Our parents aren't contributing to the wedding but we are still buying them a small gift each to say "thanks for raising us!".

    We are doing:

    Your Bride/Groom - not buying for each other

    Bride Parents & Grooms Parent

    Mums have  MOG/MOB necklace from M&S and a nice photo frame to put our wedding pic in. Haven't decided on Dads yet as they are both hard to buy for, both diabetic, and both don't drink! Did see some nice personalized sundials for the garden but not sure.

    Best man/s - up to OH, but nothing expensive, limited to £10 or under each as he has 3.

    Bridesmaid/s & flower girls - personalized necklaces from Bloom Boutique, just under £7 each in sale

    Pageboy - our son - probably just get him a toy he wants

     

  • GinAndBlingGinAndBling Posts: 1,260 New bride

    I think a little token is appreciated. 

    My thoughts and purchases so far are: 

    Your Bride/Groom - TBD but I have saved some little Cuban coins from our holiday last year (where we got engaged) which I will have made into cufflinks. 

    Bride Parents & Grooms Parent- MOB little makeup bag (few £ off of ebay). Will also get a photoframe to put a wedding photo in. No idea what else! 

    Best man/s and Ushers, and Bridesman- cufflinks each, representing something personal to them. We got these in a bridal closing down sale so mega cheap. Not sure what else!

    Bridesmaid/s - so far they have a makeup bag each with their role on. Probably also a small item of jewellery. 

     

    Our planning thread: We're completely winging it.

    My weightloss thread: Diet denial! 
  • MrsGtoBMrsGtoB Posts: 712 New bride

    I think a little token to say thank you is expected 

     

    Your Bride/Groom - I have had FYEO pics done and will make up a little pack for the morning with bits in

    Bride Parents - Earrings for my mum, united cufflinks for dad

    Grooms Parent again earrings for mum, HTAFC cufflinks for his dad

    Best man/s cufflinks again

    Bridesmaid/s a charm for her bouquet when she gets married and gift bag for table

    Pageboy giftbags for table and cufflinks

    Usher/s none

     

    I've also got PJS for me, my mum, sister and daughter and will have glasses made up for the morning of the wedding

     

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    Definitely a small token gift is appreciated but you don't need to go mad!

    This is what I have bought -

    Groom - 'Property of' pants, cufflinks with the wedding date on, some new aftershave and a watch which I'm having the wedding date engraved on the back of.  Sounds like a lot but it's under £100.  I'm hoping he will get me some perfume which I can wear on the day and a new bracelet.

    Parents - photo frame each and then flowers and a personalised candle for the Mums and cufflinks for the dads, personalised to what they are interested in.  My Dad has racehorses and his Dad has motorbikes.  Photo frames were £10 each, not sure how much the flowers will be yet as our florist is doing them.  Candles were £3 each and cufflinks were £10 each

    Bridesmaids - bag with knot bracelet, personalised glass, mini bottle of prosecco and thank you card.  About £30 all in for both but then I've only got 2 bridesmaid.

    Best Man - cufflinks, fishing reels (!) so again they were personalised to him, haven't got him anything else yet.

    Kids - we have 6 kids in the wedding party, 3 flower girls and 3 page boys.  They've got personalised drinks bottles which were £3.99 from the range for a pack of 6 - bargain!  The girls have a little bracelet each which were a couple of quid from a lady on facebook and i'm going to get all of them a little lego set each to play with at the wedding.

  • As PP's have said, gifts are a general thank you for effort put in by your wedding party and any financial contributions. Favours are for guests as a thank you for attending. Here are my thank you's: 

     

    Your Bride/Groom - Not doing this, my H2B graduated this month and wedding is next so he's getting his motorbike license from me as a graduation present and also it was my birthday this month so I got a big present for that too. 

    Bride Parents - Goods from Aspinal of London sale, Mum- a coin purse, Step- Dad - A hip flask and Dad - A wallet 

    Grooms Parent - Fancy meal out all paid for plus champagne 

    Best man/s - H2B doing this, no idea what he plans to buy them 

    Bridesmaid/s - Mini Moet, Kate Spade Bangle, Dressing Gown, and little bits and bobs 

    Pageboy - Don't have one 

    Usher/s - H2B again 

  • Rach371Rach371 Posts: 1,090 New bride

    We've had a lot of help from our bridal and groom party so we're getting presents. It's nice to say thanks for the effort they've gone to and if i were a bridesmaid who'd helped as much as mine had I'd expect a token of thanks;

    Mothers: necklace each from individual sellers on etsy

    Dads: bottle of some fancy whisky 

    Bridesmaids: I've had them both a necklace made and they're getting a bottle of champagne each

    Best man and ushers: a wine decanter

  • Samantha265Samantha265 Posts: 270 New bride

    Best man got a personalised tanker, no BMs but in past we've received jewelry to wear on the day. For readers I got necklace/earings which were silver knots on a card saying 'thanks for helping us tie the knot'. I embroidered the bags they came in with their names. We sent parents a rose bush the week after wedding, with a slate marker. 

    I think something small to say thanks for their help is a nice gesture, they start from quite reasonable prices on places like not on the high street. 

  • Barbie3Barbie3 Posts: 340 New bride

    Yes I think its necesary to get gifts 2 thank anyone who has helped u in some way or contributed to ur wedding (n for parents even if they haven't - u wouldn't be there without them!).  I don;t think its necesary to spend a fortune tho - this is one of those situations where i think it really is the thought that counts.  We didn't spend more then £40 on any gift, but we gave each person something we knew they'd really like and use (lots of fave boozes, lol) rather than generic 'bridesmaid' 'best man' etc gifts, and they all seemed really appreciative.

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride
    Beth78 wrote (see post):

    I’d have no idea what to get anyone to be honest! im not having a hen or anything, and no one is helping us financially, so do we still need to get gifts? If so what would class as a token gift? 

     

    Do you have bridesmaids/best man?  If so then just something small to say thanks for being there for me on the day.  So perhaps a bracelet for the bridesmaids and cufflinks for the best man?  My bracelets and cufflinks cost £10 each and then if you write a thank you card to go with them then that would be sufficient. 

    As others have said even if parents haven't contributed financially it's nice to say thanks as obviously without them we wouldn't here.  I guess that completely depends on your relationship though as obviously some people don't get on or their parents aren't coming etc.  A token present for them might be a nice photo frame for each set of parents or just a bunch of flowers for the mums and a bottle of booze for the dad's?

  • MrsRendall2BMrsRendall2B Posts: 664 New bride

    As PPs have said, it's nice to show your appreciation for any time/effort they've put in to making the event run smoothly.

    No other suggestions except I personally wouldn't bother with anything personalised to their roles (by all means put names on stuff) - I know I wouldn't be too fussed about wearing 'Bridesmaid' pjs more than once or using a makeup bag with the same title on. I reckon most just end up in a drawer somewhere, as nice of an idea as they seem.

  • MrsCToBeeMrsCToBee Posts: 2,458 New bride
    MrsRendall2B wrote (see post):

    As PPs have said, it's nice to show your appreciation for any time/effort they've put in to making the event run smoothly.

    No other suggestions except I personally wouldn't bother with anything personalised to their roles (by all means put names on stuff) - I know I wouldn't be too fussed about wearing 'Bridesmaid' pjs more than once or using a makeup bag with the same title on. I reckon most just end up in a drawer somewhere, as nice of an idea as they seem.

    Totally agree, I have avoided anything with roles on as I know I wouldn't use them again.

  • MrsCToBeeMrsCToBee Posts: 2,458 New bride

    Didn't you check the wedding date with the wedding party before you booked?

    People tend to either give gifts privately in the morning, or do it during the speeches. We will do it during the speeches.

  • MrsCToBeeMrsCToBee Posts: 2,458 New bride

    Such a shame Beth ☹

  • Michelle330Michelle330 Posts: 119

    I agree with you on gifts as I think it’s not essentail as you’re realistically buying dinner and providing a party for everyon. The only gifts I’m going to buy are for the best man and the bridesmaids because they will have helped with the planning. 

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