i have asked my sister to be my chief bridesmaid, but she is proving to be hard work! she is stressing me, she wont wear any dresses i choose for her.

when i ask here to help me out with sound wedding shoppin or anything to do with my wedding she gets funny. xx

is this just her being jelous or doesnt she want to be part of my wedding xx


  • patsyukpatsyuk Posts: 11
    If she is going to look nice on the pictures then she will not have such a long face if she likes the dress. Try to compromise you wouldnt like to be told what to wear on a night out, what makes this so different. Jealous know your sister. Good luck
  • My sister's exactly the same, she says she's not going to do anything she doesn't want to and will not be a bridesmaid if she hates the dress (I want the bridesmaids in traditional dresses and she would rather wear just a summery dress I think) and, like your sister, doesn't seem very interested in anything to do with the wedding. She's also refusing to bring her boyfriend along unless he's allowed to sit on the top table and there just won't be room for him, especially since if we let him on there then it's not fair on the best man's girlfriend or my other bridesmaid's husband. My other bridesmaid was absolutely thrilled and honoured to be asked and will do anything I want her to, so she's going to be my chief bridesmaid I think.

    I don't think it's jealousy on my sister's part because my mum and I often joke that she'll probably just come home one day and announce she's got married and she always says she wants to get married in her jeans. I think it's just that we have completely different ideas about what a wedding should be and she doesn't recognise that it's my day so I should be able to have what I want.
  • Lou_1986Lou_1986 Posts: 1,584
    you should try reverse cycology (or however you spell it, sorry cold head on today!) tell them that if they are going to be like that then there is no point in them being bridesmaid and ruining your day, maybe even threaten for them not to bother coming as they will ruin the pictures hehe.

    my sister is fine with it all, chose my bridesmaids and dresses for me!! but they are nice and they will prob use them again as we are getting married abroad they dont want anything too heavy as they will get too hot
  • cheryl654cheryl654 Posts: 366
    Don't agree with Trotters and think it is your wedding Sammy, so she should expect that you will be arranging it along your own themes and ideas. My sister originally would not be a bridesmaid as said she was too fat (she's not) but then realised that she didn't like the two peice strapless dresses I had chosen, she's now having an off the shoulder number in the same fabric so she doesn't feel so exposed around her boobs. There is a compromise but it has to be made on both sides but to fit in with your plans Sammy as this is YOUR day not hers.
  • I agree with Cheryl, it is your wedding and it is one day where people should be pleased to do whatever you want and nobody should try to ruin it, if she carries on maybe you could give her a different role other than being your bridesmaid? I gave my bridesmaids plenty of opportunity to go dress shopping (year and a half) and they came up with nothing so i went into Debenhams last week with my mum and picked them myself and said tough basically, luckily they all seem to like them and they fit like a dream! Hope it all goes well and stick to your guns, it is your dayx
  • helenwileshelenwiles Posts: 215
    one of my bridesmaids was a bit like this. when i got engaged she hardly ever asked about how the wedding plans were going but now she has just recently got engaged she is asking me all questions etc so i think like yours it is jealousy and at the end of the day it is your wedding and you only get the chance once so let her know how you feel and if she doesnt like it then im afraid its tough because its your day not hers (hope im not too harsh!)x
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