Were you nervous?

So, were you nervous to show your preferred wedding dress to your bridesmaids? That's what I'm doing this weekend and I feel oddly nervous! I really love the dress, but what if they don't? I know it doesn't really matter, I have to wear it but I would of course feel better if they loved it too! 

My bridesmaids and I have quite different tastes so they wouldn't pick my dress for themselves, is there a way to gently remind them that we are shopping for me and not trying to find their dress?!

How did showing the dress to your bridesmaids go?

Posts

  • MrsG2bxxMrsG2bxx Posts: 868

    Ahhh sweets! I feel for you! I went through exactly this 2 weeks ago!

    It is ultimately how you feel about it and that's all that should matter but I understand completely as I was the same.  Just walk out and be confident and happy in your dress, don't walk out expecting them to not like it as that'll show and they may feel that you aren't comfortable in your dress and try to comfort you that way if you see what I mean, like instead of seeing the beauty of the dress, see that their friend is anxious and uncomfortable!

    I was so so so nervous 2 weeks ago when I took my sister to see my dress, she couldn't make my original dress appointment and I didn't really think I would find it, she is my maid of honour and the most important person in my life (equal to my mum & fiancé) if she didn't like it then I probably wouldn't have bought it.

    I went in with my auntie and put the dress on, got the veil on and stood ready for my sister to walk round the corner and see me in it, and at first she was really hard to read, she was quiet and just kept walking around me...I was like 'SAY SOMETHING, ANYTHING!!!' I felt like I was going to cry.....then she walked behind me and i heard my mum say 'she's crying!!' I looked round and she was in tears just saying 'that's your dress!!' it was emosh! and i think my nerves leading up to that made it even more emotional for me as i am not one to cry at all!!!

    Maybe you should try to do the same, ask the ladies to go get you ready while your girls have a look about, once it is all on and you are stood by that mirror waiting for them to walk around you will feel so different from if you walked out of your changing room waiting to be judged as it were!!

    make sure you let us know how it goes!! xx

     

     

  • LittlespiceLittlespice Posts: 665

    Good luck! I would also recommend letting them know that you love it and really hope they do too, so that even if they don't like it they can be tactful and sensitive in how they go about it. I'm sure it's beautiful and that they will love it though! X

  • I think how you manage their expectations before they see the dress can make a huge difference. When I got married first time I really struggled to find a dress and whilst I am a confident person happy to stand my ground, my friends and families have such big personalities too it was like herding cats! Impossible to get them to focus on the dress I was wearing and not their pick.

    This time I went on my own and found my dress and invited people along to 'see the dress I had chosen.' it was very clear it was my dress and a courtesy to show them. I only tried on that one dress in front of them. Be clear in your language; you aren't going dress shopping again, or showing her your favourite, you are showing her the dress you have chosen. That way, she will only speak out if she has huge issues with it, rather than just general feedback that may knock your confidence  

  • NozomiNozomi Posts: 161

    Thank you so much everyone! This is all really helpful, I definitely think I'm going to sell it as The One although we are going to one other shop before just so I can try on some more to double make sure but I'll just let them know it's for fun and we will see The One later. 

    I'll get ready properly in the dressing room so veil on, hair fixed and my own shoes etc and walk out with a big smile on my face! It's hard not to because I love it so much and didn't want to take it off before so that should be easy! 

     

    Will let you know how it goes! 

  • TheLegacyofMrsM wrote (see post):

    I think how you manage their expectations before they see the dress can make a huge difference. When I got married first time I really struggled to find a dress and whilst I am a confident person happy to stand my ground, my friends and families have such big personalities too it was like herding cats! Impossible to get them to focus on the dress I was wearing and not their pick.

    This time I went on my own and found my dress and invited people along to 'see the dress I had chosen.' it was very clear it was my dress and a courtesy to show them. I only tried on that one dress in front of them. Be clear in your language; you aren't going dress shopping again, or showing her your favourite, you are showing her the dress you have chosen. That way, she will only speak out if she has huge issues with it, rather than just general feedback that may knock your confidence  

    Very good advice from someone who obviously knows what they're talking about. Good luck any way :)

  • NozomiNozomi Posts: 161

    I did it! The dress is ordered! Eeep! 

    I presented it as The Dress to my one bridesmaid, 25% of total bridesmaids, that actually came to what was meant to be bridesmaid weekend (but that's another story!). I came out fully dressed, I did a full face of make up and roughly styled my hair into what I will probably have and put my chosen veil and shoes on and came out!

    She immediately clasped her hands over her mouth and looked like she was going to cry (which is very rare for her!) and she just kept saying it's beautiful and later told me she got goosebumps. I think the nicest thing she said was that the dress just suited my personality so well and it's exactly what she would put me in. YAY!

  • MrsG2bxxMrsG2bxx Posts: 868

    Ahhhh yay!!!! so happy for you hunny!!!! that's amazing!! and so exciting that it is ordered!! shame your other bridesmaids didn't make it! xxx

     

     

  • Aww, sweetie! I totally understand why you're nervous. I myself chose to go with a vintage style for my wedding and I was also thinking about what others would say.

    But remember this is your day, and the most important part is that you do what you want to do! I bet your bridesmaids and friends will love what you picked out as long as you are confident in what you chose, and it looks like you are :)

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