I don't know how to handle this!!

II've not posted on here in ages but I'm really at a lose as to what to do!

My oldest and best friend has brought me a gift for my wedding and says she wants me to have it as my something new.

She has refused to tell me what it is but after lots of pushing I've managed to get it out of her that's it's jewellery! 

She won't tell me anything more about it and it's stressing me out! I want everything to be perfect and i had an idea of what jewellery I wanted but now I'm being told not to buy any! 

I trust her 100% But I'm still worrying about it as she has already brought it and I've not mentioned among styles to her previously.

Posts

  • Amy491Amy491 Posts: 58

    I would get in touch with her and say you really appreciate the thought behind it but you want to decide your jewellery yourself for such an important day and don’t want any surprises. Could she please send you pictures/go pick something together if she hasn’t bought it already.

    i would not be comfortable at all with my wedding jewellery being a suprise

  • MrsTraceyMrsTracey Posts: 831 New bride

    Do you think she knows your style pretty well? If she's your oldest and best friend she may well know the kind of thing you usually wear and have got it just right, so you may have nothing to worry about. However if you want to be sure I would maybe just gently explain and be honest. Say you're thrilled and love the idea of her jewellery being your "something new", but you do want to make sure it fits the rest of your look, so could you have a look at it together. 

    If it's still not right I would maybe suggest going shopping together for something that works? Of course, you know your friend and if she'd be offended by this, but I know my closest friends would much prefer I took the honest approach. 

  • Emma898Emma898 Posts: 4

    I agree with Amy 491. Thank your friend for the gift. And say that you will certainly wear this jewelery the other day.

  • KittyFiennesKittyFiennes Posts: 974 New bride

    Could you tell her that you had planned on wearing xyz that your OH gave you or that you'd planned to wear some piece(s) from your mum/ granny/ other family member and that you are now conflicted as to what to do?  (Just make sure that on the day you ARE wearing something from them.)  I doubt that she would consider her gift more important to wear on your wedding day than something sentimental from your groom or family.  You could always offer to wear her jewellry on your honeymoon or at an after-wedding brunch (if you're having one).

  • Barbie3Barbie3 Posts: 340 New bride

    I think u just need 2 be really honest with her and say u have a specific look in mind n planned 2 pick out ur own jewellery, so she needs 2 show u or get a different gift.  If ur friendship is that good she should understand! 

  • I would just say thank you very much, and you will wear it on the day IF it matches and fits in with the look you want. If not, you will certainly wear it on honeymoon. I don't see how anyone could possibly be offended by that. Afterall, it was a bit presumptious to expect you will definitely want to wear it on the day.

  • Mrs2018Mrs2018 Posts: 398
    KittyFiennes wrote (see post):

    Could you tell her that you had planned on wearing xyz that your OH gave you or that you'd planned to wear some piece(s) from your mum/ granny/ other family member and that you are now conflicted as to what to do?  (Just make sure that on the day you ARE wearing something from them.)  I doubt that she would consider her gift more important to wear on your wedding day than something sentimental from your groom or family.  You could always offer to wear her jewellry on your honeymoon or at an after-wedding brunch (if you're having one).

    I've done exactly this! I have earring from my h2b that I wanted to wear and was going to get a new necklace to match. She says the set will match the earrings and my belt. It comes with earring but I should just not wear them.

    She will not give up the secret I've even asked her shoe it my mum or sister so they can say if it's the sort of stuff I've been looking at but she won't do that as she thinks they will tell me (which my sister definitely would). 

    I think I'm going do what Mrs squirrel manning has said and take one of my special necklaces with me just incase (luckily I have a few already that match the earrings) 

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