family problems

i wanna get married abroad but my parents r divorced and they hate eachother!! so does my step parents, its so hard coz i really wanna do it in crete but there all being funny bout it they wont stay in the same hotel, wont go on the same flights anything!! how can i do this??? its not like i can have a nice family meal after? lol i would go and get married just me and m2b but i have 2 have my mum n dad there any1 else having problems?? please help girls thanks x


  • leighh5leighh5 Posts: 1,439
    i would arrange a drink or meal - invite them all and explain to them its your day and this is all upsetting you. Your not asking them to be best friends just to be civil for your special day x
  • yer i no wot u mean but i dont even think they will do that! lol i will give it a go
  • BambagirlBambagirl Posts: 7,506
    Best of luck, laydeekayjay - I think that weddings are a time when warring family member really MUST put aside their differences to support the happy couple.
  • linzi108linzi108 Posts: 403
    I have a similar problem as in almost 20 years since they got divorced, my parents have been in the same room twice and can't even bare to look at each other.

    I'm getting married in Cyprus and was terribly worried about how they'd be but in the end I was just straight with them. I told them if they wanted to be there for my wedding then they'd have to bury the hatchet and be civil with each other and if they couldn't do that then they wouldn't be welcome ( I obvously was a little more tactful in my wording but you get the jist!!) I'd have hated it if either of them said they wouldn't come but I knew in the end I was more important to them than their problems.

    Theres nothing to say your guests all have to stay in the same hotel (mine aren't) so thats that problem solved and if they care about you then they'll be able to manage to play nice for a few days. At the end of the day its your day and they should respect that you want it to be as stress free as possible. Hope you find a way to sort it.

  • yer i no i really hope so they all wanna be there so there gonna have 2 b civil 2 eachother, i would love 2 just go and get married with me n m2b but i have 2 have my dad there and my mum its so bloody hard! thanks guys x
  • We had the same problem with h2b's family. We have solved it by basically letting everyone stay in different hotels, go on different flights. But we have told them that on the day they will behave, they will get on and they wont kick off. H2b has given them a warning that he will never forgive them if they kick off on our wedding day, and everyone has agreed to be civil so fingers crossed it should go ok on the day.

  • I think you need to be straight with them. Worst case scenario they say they can't be civil and you and H2B head off by yourselves. If you can live with that then there is nothing to be lost by sitting them all down and telling them how you feel about it but don't allow other people to dictate how to spend your day. It's about the two of you and no one else.

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