When/How to send 'Save the Dates'

Hi everyone,

Just looking for some advice.

We are planning a New York wedding in April 2016. The flights will likely come out 11 months before this, and I don't want to plan anything until we have flights booked.

However, I would have liked to send out the Save The Dates a year before so that people can save etc, what would you do?

Our STD's will likely be sent out around 10 months before the wedding - is this enough time?


  • Speccy4eyesSpeccy4eyes Posts: 2,050

    I would have thought not, a wedding abroad will incur a lot of costs for people and the more time you can give people, the less chance of rejection. Maybe let it be known the year, season and destination sooner rather than later

  • We have told people verbally, I just wanted to send a Save the Date too.


    Do you think it'd be strange to send a 'Save the Month'? 

  • Speccy4eyesSpeccy4eyes Posts: 2,050

    Not at all.... Start a trend.... Anything that helps get your guests to your big day cant be bad

  • Beth90Beth90 Posts: 284

    Maybe send a "we're getting married" memo. You can't really send a save the date if you don't know the date but maybe a little card saying we are getting married, April 2016, date to be confirmed. So that whoever get one knows to start saving. They wouldn't be able to book the date off work so far in advance anyway so maybe just let people kniw via invite when you have a date set 



  • heliganedenheliganeden Posts: 1,848

    I think it's best to let people know asap if you're planning to get married abroad, you don't need to have the date - you know it'll be April 2016, don't get caught up in the ideas it can only be a 'save the date' image

    You could send a card that says, 'we're getting married in New York April 2016 and wanted to let you know asap as we'd love you to join us, when we know the exact details we'll let you know'  

    Then once you know the date you can just send invites 

  • Thanks everyone.


    I just want to let them know ASAP about the date so they have more of a chance of getting flights at the best price - I might do the 'we are getting married in April 2016' then send the invites out around 10 months before..


  • My head is saying:

    Small card with April 2016 - asap

    STD - 10 months ahead

    Invitation - around 4 months before?


    I am aware that I could be bombarding people though, what would you guys think if you received this?

  • ICW2014ICW2014 Posts: 111

    I guess it depends on how many people you are going to have on your guestlist? Realistically I would envisage if it is in New York your guest list won't be massive and will be family and good friends. With this in mind, if you've already told people verbally you could do as you suggested and send asimple reminder card now, e.g. 'we're getting married, New York, summer 2016, we hope you'll be able to join us, more details to follow', then send a save the date once you know details. 

    HOWEVER, I wouldn't get too hung up on the idea of having to send any information to guests 12 months before the day. We have only just sent out our save the dates with 7 months to go as we were originally planning for 2016 and then decided to go for May 2015. Nobody was bothered by us not having sent them out a year in advance, and this is for a Thursday wedding in half term week!

    Hope you find a solution, remember to just do what is right for you and not worry too much about what 'typical' things you should be doing - we went to a wedding in Greece last year and they didn't even bother with invites or any stationery!


  • MrsMannionMrsMannion Posts: 1,342 New bride

    hiya I gettin married June 16 in Rhodes I have already told family verbally about it, I am giving my save the date card out at Christmas, because you can book holidays for 2016 in April / may next so gives them a few months to get deposits ready to book their holiday and so they when they need to be a Rhodes, I am then Christmas 2015 give them and invite with all the full details to the ones who have booked a holiday.

  • heliganedenheliganeden Posts: 1,848
    Bubble13 wrote (see)

    My head is saying:

    Small card with April 2016 - asap

    STD - 10 months ahead

    Invitation - around 4 months before?


    I am aware that I could be bombarding people though, what would you guys think if you received this?

    I would miss out the save the date and just send invites out 10 months ahead - we sent invites out 12 months ahead for our wedding abroad, pretty much as soon as we knew the date, I don't think you need to send save the dates plus invites 

  • JulyBugJulyBug Posts: 420

    Same here heliganeden - I'd recommend this approach. We sent out save the dates about 14 months before and we're about to send out the invites - 9 months before. It just means you need to be a bit more prepared but people will need a lot of the info you'll put in the invites in order to book the flights (where is it/what's happening around the wedding day itself etc) so it makes sense to send it all in one go so people can properly book (eg they may want to make a hol out of it and go somewhere before/after the wedding so the more info you can give them the better.

  • You could just send out an "engagement announcement" instead of an actual save-the- date. "We are Engaged! Stay Tuned for More Details on Our New York Wedding in April 2016..." etc etc. I wouldn't skip the idea entirely. Several posters have already pointed out the value of letting people know "extra" in-advance due to the added cost of a destination wedding and the time-off of work issue.

    If you are well connected on social media (which I'm not), you could also save the cost and do this electronically.

  • FayeDFayeD Posts: 15

    We are spending a week in Italy and emailed our own word doc as a 'Save the Date' with info on the whole week. Including intended flight details, hotel we are staying in, Signor/Signora night out (hen/stag do) ceremony and reception location. We have now arranged and booked flights and accommodation as group bookings so have got discounts and made it easy for our guests.

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