What is the general consensus here, do people expect a gift? If so would you give money (they live together and  haven't provided a gift list) or a personal gift? 

If it has any bearing the trip has cost £2500 (exc spending money) but is obviously a holiday too

Thanks for any advice! 



  • Amy466Amy466 Posts: 3

    I, maybe wrongly, expected a gift of some sort. but we had a wedding local to everyone and paid for all food and drink for the day. However, I wouldn't if I'd made my guests have to pay to come a distance and they'd have to either stay in a hotel etc. And wouldn't expect anything from people I know we're not in a position to for financial reasons etc. In fact my sisters just got me a card and chocolate to have the night before as they were Staying at mine. Neither of them drive and they'd paid £90 on train fares so didn't feel disgruntled with the chocolates. I was with my parents thou haha, didn't get a thing and didn't even offer one of my sisters a lift home! 

  • Oh sorry I should have said yes the wedding is abroad, thanks for your reply Amy. First time I've been to a wedding abroad and nothing has been said about gifts and I'm not sure what to do. We've spent a lot of money so a bit skint at the moment but equally don't want to turn up with nothing.

    I guess I'm leaning towards some sort of gift but wondered if brides abroad expect more? No judgement but would like to see what the consensus is xx

  • Why don't you buy them something after you return? As carrying a gift abroad would be difficult

  • MrsNH17MrsNH17 Posts: 644 New bride

    I dont think people getting married abroad expect a gift. My good friend is getting married abroad next year and she basically said she feels guilty asking people to spend so much so I don’t think she’d then expect a present as well knowing that going to her wedding is costing far more than average (it’s in Cyprus).

    I’m going to get her a nice card and will buy her drinks etc on her hen do but I’m not getting them a present. She was my BM and for my wedding i paid for her outfit (£300- a skirt top combo that they could wear again), hair and make up (£100) bridesmaid gift (£50) and a deluxe room at my venue for her and her now fiancé (prob about £250) then I’m going to end up spending at least £1200 on flights and accommodation for her wedding excluding spending money (we will make a holiday out of it since the flights are not cheap). They did get us a £50 gift but I’ve spent way enough on her as far as I’m concerned so I’m not going to feel guilty about it - I’ll be on maternity leave too so actually attending her wedding will be a real dint in finances when I’m not receiving my salary! 

  • We're getting married abroad and our invitations have a little rhyme on them basically saying that people making the effort to come is the greatest gift we could ask for but a polite note that if they absolutely feel they must give us something, we'd prefer money towards the honeymoon.

    In short, I don't think there's much expectation of gifts for weddings abroad. A nice card and maybe a drink or two at the hen do will suffice! :)

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