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Fat bride

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  • I strongly believe there is no right or wrong size as long as the individual is happy in themselves. It sounds like you’re not feeling too good right now and that’s sad. I reckon a lot of your insecurities are made worse by the fact that, as you say, you have worked hard to improve your diet and then stopped. Brides always look beautiful because on the day they feel so happy and special that it shines out of their smile and is infectious to those around them. You will look beautiful! On the day you will be so happy to finally have your wedding day that I am sure you won’t even be thinking these thoughts, especially if you find a dress that you feel proud to wear. 

    As you said, you know your husband will think you love amazing and your guests will think the same.

    If you still don’t feel like that‘s enough, I used the Cambridge diet before my wedding day and that worked wonders. I’m not going to lie, it’s strict and not easy, but if you’re really focused it definitely produces results. - don’t feel like you need to go down this route though, lots of people choose to diet before their weddings because they have similar thoughts to yours no matter their size. Insecurities are normal but your wedding day is so special hopefully it’ll blow those thoughts away.

  • Please don't stress. You will look beautiful on the day and no one will notice your skinny bridesmaids. They will all be concentrating on how gorgeous you look. 

    I am not much for slimming world either it's a pain. I can lose half a stone then that's it. 

    As you say your friends, family and H2B love you for who you are. I am on the curvier side too and I was very conscious of my arms and chin, however the photographer and videographer took such wonderful shots that I actually like the pictures. 

    I did stress for a while but in the end I thought I am who I am and if people don't like it I will give them what for! 

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  • Have you tried a diet and exercise programme from the perspective of health and well-being versus looks and appearances?  Maybe if you changed your perspective on the end goal.  The end goal should be to be fit and healthy: a good BMI, a healthy heart, strong muscles, etc.  Not to look like Angelina or anyone else.

    6 months is a LONG time.  You could make a lot of progress in that amount of time, if you put your mind to it.  Heck, I've had a nasty cold for the past week and lost almost 5 pounds without intending to!  I'm a so-called skinny person and I credit it to sheer willpower because my will to be healthy is greater than my want for foods x, y, and z and desire to be inactive.  It's not because I want to look like someone else, like a "model."  I just want to be the best version of me inside and out.

    In the end though, the decision needs to be made to make a healthy lifestyle a permanent, long-term commitment.  I'm a huge hater of the "wedding diet."  If the cuts in food and the increased exercise aren't incorporated into your permanent lifestyle, what's the point? 

    I encourage you to go for it.  Once you get into the swing of things, it becomes part of your life and is no longer a chore, and you'll feel GREAT both inside and out. 

    Check out this amazing wedding report - what an inspiring story (and a beautiful wedding).

    http://www.youandyourwedding.co.uk/forum/your-wedding-reports/until-the-stars-fall/381466.html

     

  • I’m a fatter bride than you - size 22/24 and I know exactly how you feel. I have gorgeous maids who are all size 12 and under and it’s tempting to force them to all wear paper bags on their heads! BUT at the weekend I found my dress. And I have not been able to stop looking at pictures of it since because I love it and I look awesome in it. You will find a dress that makes you feel rocking and it will all melt away. 

    As for worrying about the beach there’s nothing wrong with a one piece and a sarong if that’s what makes you comfortable! Make like the 50s glamour pinups and enjoy your wedding trip. You deserve it! 

    If you want to lose the weight you go for it but don‘t try and lose it all and then put it all right back on straight after the wedding. It means you’ll only look at your wedding pictures feeling rubbish you can’t fit into that dress any more. Read the piece by Lindy West about being a fat bride it’s beautiful and will make you feel so awesome. You're welcome to message me if you want to chat more :) xxxx

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  • MrsJ2017MrsJ2017 Posts: 3,017

    I agree with focusing on the health side too, because I’m those terms, no, it’s not ok to be fat, it puts a strain on your body, shortens your life expectancy and bodes ill for your future. All those things are more important than looking like angelina.

    But, that doesn’t mean you shouldnt love yourself as you are, no matter what size you are you are worthy of the love of others and yourself. Being fat doesn’t make you any less of a wonderful person.

    Have you considered exercises you could do rather than weight loss clubs or diets? I started weightlifting in November alongside calorie counting (and I’m allowed more than enough calories) and it’s been the best results I’ve ever had from anything. Ive done running, kickboxing and other martial arts, horse riding, rock climbing, swimming etc, but none have compared to weights for getting lean fast.

    Im a size 12, 30 years old, stretch marked belly afterhaving 3 kids. But I’ll wear a bikini because why on earth should anyone , regardless of size or condition, not?! 

  • MrsJ, I'd like to add that I can'r even believe that you have three children, you have an amazing figure.  You've clearly put in the work and it's paid off.  Good for you for working it, girl.

     

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