Worried about my weight for my wedding :(

Hi everyone,

I'm quite new to this forum so please bear with me!

I'm getting married in October, we've been engaged for a year and a half. I used to be thin when I was a teenager/early 20s, but about 6 years ago I started to get fatter and became overweight - I think I lost my good metabolism. My family are all really thin so I've had really low self confidence comparing myself to them.

I managed to lose about 12kg which has made a significant difference to my figure. But we're getting closer to the wedding now and I haven't lost as much as I wanted to. I just don't think I'm going to get down to my target weight in time for the wedding or my dress fitting in September. 

I'm so worried about looking fat in my wedding photos, particularly as my bridemaids are my sisters and they are much thinner and prettier than me. I generally just feel frumpy and ugly next to my sisters (but I love them to bits which is why they're my bridesmaids!!)

I'm so anxious about this and I'm worried it'll spoil my day. I'm finding it so hard to diet at the moment as work and family life are quite stressful, and adding a strict diet to things would just be too much. But I want to be beautiful for my wedding. 

I just wanted to know if anyone else is going through anything similar and if they've managed to be happy with themselves how they are. I wish I could just accept how I am so that I can be happy and enjoy the wedding to the full.

Thanks in advance and sorry for the moany post!

 

 

 

Posts

  • HydrogirlHydrogirl Posts: 809

    i used to be a size 10 when i met hubby, 12 when we got engaged and for my wedding (a year later) i was a size 16 and still am, i stress eat! i was not as slim as i wanted, i tried but failed to lose weigth but in the end i gave up caring and enjoyed my day! hubby loves me whatever size. most of my family are slim too and my bm was a size 8 naturally and tall and blonde (im short, fat and dark haired) however i didnt care on the day (especially when her makeup was orange and she barely smiled all day - she is sil and i hate her lol)

    nobody will be judging u on the day or comparing u to ur bms, they will all be blown away at u in ur lovely dress!

  • MrsPtoB2015MrsPtoB2015 Posts: 107

    hey there!!

     

    First of all dont worry... Like Hydrogirl says he loves you as you are and so does everyone that is attending. If you are not comfortable as you are then maybe get a shoulder bolero or something if that makes you feel more confident.

    If you do want to still try and lose weight the only advice I can give which works for me so may not work for you is the fasting diet.. I cant diet 24/7 as I am quite sociable and feel too restriced. With this diet you are really strict 2 or 3 days with minimal calories and then you can eat normally on the other days and still lose weight, it has huge health benefits too.

    But hey I am trying to lose weight and have decided until I am happy with myself Im not trying on wedding dresses... eek... time is running out!!

  • Spam88Spam88 Posts: 1,001

    You will be the most beautiful person in the room on your wedding day, regardless of your weight or anyone elses! image  I'm not one for crash diets (I thoroughly disapprove!), but to start with how about just logging everything you eat into a calorie tracker (I use My Fitness Pal) - that'll help you identify foods that may be contributing more calories than you expect to your intake (I was rather shocked when I discovered butter is about 50 calories per slice of bread...so no more butter!).  Then you can start to look at reducing your calorie intake and maybe introducing a little more exercise image

  • MrsG23MrsG23 Posts: 231

    Hey! This is something I have always stressed over too... I was always the bigger sister - Im only a size 10 - 12, but my sisters were both size 6 - 8 and could eat whatever whereas I have always had to be careful - Ive got boobs, a waist and hips! But, like the other girls have said, your OH loves you no matter what size you are!

    I agree with MrsPtoB2015 - the 5:2 works wanders for me! I still get to eat my chocolate and go for dinner without feeling guilty! Ive lost just over a stone since christmas (I wasnt following quite so rigidly as I should have done!)

    Goodluck - but just remember, everything looks beautiful in a wedding dress! image xxx

  • Jomc11Jomc11 Posts: 484

    Have just saw this post from a while ago, 3 months is still a decent enough time to lose some weight/tone up etc.

    I know exactly how you feel, I have been the same, I know I have to lose & I want to lose but making it happen is a different story.

    This post was from a few weeks ago, how you getting on now?

  • Rebecca87Rebecca87 Posts: 2

    Hi everyone,

    Thanks so much for replying! You're posts all made me feel better about it and it's so good to know I'm not the only one who's felt this way...

    I'm feeling more positive definitely. I've got my hen-do this weekend so after that I'm going on a 4 week strict diet before my dress fitting. I've done low-carbing in the past which has worked and so I'm gonna do that again but with a few treats to keep me sane! MyFitness Pal is a great idea too, I'll definitely try that too. Hopefully that'll get me closer to my target weight and I'll feel happy in my dress.

    My sisters/bridesmaids have just had their dresses fitted and they are SO skinny but they look beautiful and I just need to remember that they're there for me and it doesn't matter if I'm bigger than them!

    But you're all right - it's my wedding day and I'm hoping that my happiness will shine through that no-one would be thinking of my chubbiness! I am what I am, and I'm gonna lose a bit more weight but even if I don't get down to my goal, I just need to remind myself that I am the bride and I'll be gorgeous no matter what! Just so difficult to accept when you have low self esteem...! 

    Thanks so much all for your kind and helpful words xx

  • Victoria25Victoria25 Posts: 250

    I'm a size 12 and have gone up a dress size since meeting H2B.  My problem with my weight and body shape is my arms.  To put it bluntly I have 'bingo wings' and have occasions where they really get me down.  

    H2B's sister is a bridesmaid and she is a size 8.  There is a picture of us at another wedding and I just look so frumpy compared to her!  However I know that on my wedding day I'll be wearing a wedding dress so hopefully it'll be OK!

    Best thing you can do is focus on the positives rather than the negatives.  I've chosen a dress that shows off my waist and will find something I can cover my arms with.  

    Have you been exercising?  I've downloaded the Nike Training Club app and it's really hard but beats going to the gym!  I'm also trying jogging as well.  I used to use My Fitness Pal as well and even though I've been lazy and given it up it's still helped me learn a few things so I definitely eat much healthier than before.

    Good luck!

  • SheandHimSheandHim Posts: 379

    I have the same problem, I'm 5'9 and size 16-18 and my sister is 5ft and size 6-8, it's safe to say we look ridiculous together! I'm sure your photographer has some nifty ideas of how to position people, so I really wouldn't worry about photos at least. You're going to be in a beautiful dress, people aren't going to be thinking "cor look at the arse on her" they're going to be commenting on how beautiful your dress is and how amazing your event organisation is.

    but still, damn those thin people!

  • when me and my fiance got together 7yrs ago i was 22 and around 14-16.. now im size 26 and hate it, my 4 adult bridesmaids are all like cocktail sticks and im gonna look so daft next to them.. i wouldnt actually mind getting married at the size i am but my bum is well out of proportion and dresses look stupid on me, only thing is i cant seem to slim down.. i have absolutely no will power whatsoever.. you would think getting married is enough to make me loose weight but no.. im really struggling!

    Im getting married in august 2015 and im hoping between now and then i find some willpower from somewhere and loose the weight from my bum.. once ive done that i'll be happy getting married while being "big" 

    I dont care what other people think of me but i need to do it so i feel comfortable!

    I hope you manage to get to where you want to be before your wedding!!

    Good luck!!

  • Danielle, I don't know if it would help but my SIL was probably about your size when she got married.  She still looked fab in her dress and her and my brother have some lovely photos.

    However a couple of years ago she joined Weight Watchers and lost quite a bit of weight.  She never exercised, she just changed her eating habits.  But because she could still have Weight Watchers cake, chocolate and wine (though admittedly she did say the wine was a bit awful) she found it easier to stick to than other diets.

  • I think i might have to try something like weight watchers or slimming world.. ive got a feeling its going to be the only way im gonna lose abit!

  • Jomc11Jomc11 Posts: 484

    I can recommend weight watchers too, I lost 4 stone a few years ago (put it all back on tho !) in a few months & was still eating crisps/chocolate everyday & would go out the weekend, it is the only one I've found that lets you still have a live & not just oh don't eat anything except veg! Back on it to try lose for my day in  February

  • Well i started a diet and exercise routine last week.. i havent weighed myself yet though because im scared i havent lost anything image Im calorie counting everything! In fact i think im a little obsessed with the calorie counting now!

  • Hi

    im a size 18, and I found it very difficult to lose weight before my wedding, I hadno will power at all! I was dreading trying dresses on, but after I came out of the first wedding shop I suddenly found my willpower!! All the dresses were lovely but I could only choose froma small range at the back of the shop! Once I tired a few dresses on I realised that I can loose weight and feel good on my wedding day! I've been doing slimming world and found the book by marisa peer 'you can be thin' really helpful! I've so far lost almost 2 stone and every time i feel like I'm going to fall off the slimming wagon I start trying dresses on again and it gives me such an incentive! I've realised ill never be a size 8 but to feel comfortable on my wedding day that's all I want! 

  • Jomc11Jomc11 Posts: 484

    aaw danielle try not get obsessed you'll make yourself worse & then youll stress!

    Clairemarieyates well done on losing that, thats fab, I agree there is no bigger incentive than a wedding dress image

     

  • On your wedding day, all eyes will be on you. So don't worry about how your sister looks in comparison to you.

     

  • Give a holler if you or another beautiful bride you know would like online counseling/ goal planning/ meal planning for weight loss with a fun dietitian!  $55 pays for e-ve-ry-thing, not a penny more.

    This here is my website www.nutritionwithrachel.com.  

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