FEELING REALLY DOWN.

Hi,



Sorry for this rather rambling post I don't really know how to put this without sounding depressing to everybody but i just need to get this off my chest. Hubby and I have been ttc for over 3 years with no sucess and a lot of disappointment. We have had all the usual tests and it was found that I wasn't ovulating (which was a bit of a suprise to me as my periods had always been regular 28 days) so I was prescribed chlomid. I started to feel really positive that it would really happen for me when the chlomid made me ovulate. During this 6 month cycle of chlomid we had our wedding in may which meant every month although disappointed i still felt excitement and something to look forward too. Then since the wedding I have thought well thats ok I can concentrate on ttc again. But still every month big fat nothing and the cycle has finshed and i have another appointment with the hospital next month and I really don't know what the next step is. What is making it worse is that well meaning people keep saying "ooh baby next!!!" and I either want to burst into tears or hit them!!! We decided when we were going to try we wouldn't tell anybody as we didn't want the extra pressure but I caved and told my mum and she has been great going to appts with me and general support. But now my lovely sister-in-law is pregnant and she has had troubles but it makes me so sad when I see her I can hardly look at her, which is terriblle because she hasn't done anything wrong and of course she doesn't know we have been trying for so long. I feel so guilty for my mum as well because she tries not to mention much to me although she shouldn't have to it's not her fault and she should be able to look forward to her 1st grandchild and not have to tread on eggshells around me. I feel so sad and my husband is great but everything he tries to say to cheer me up and support me I throw back at him because I feel so helpless and i'm sure he does to. I don't want to make everybodies life hell around me but i feel like I can't help it I'm so unhappy.



I'm sorry for going on and I have tears running down my face as i write this but it feels good to tell this to somebody.



Thanks for listening.

Posts

  • Don't know what to say.... I'm sorry for what you are going through must be so hard for you to hear others around you getting pregnant when your having great difficulty. I hope they find something to help you soon x
  • Hi Mrs Cooper



    I'm sorry to hear how your feeling.



    I know how it is as we tried for years with nothing happening and all my friends and cousins getting pregnant.



    I was very down for ages until me and HTB talked about it and took action. Just like you we got assitance. I'm sorry to hear that this first course hasn't helped. But go back and keep trying.



    We finally did it and had a daughter and then found out I was pregnant again when she was only 9 months. Our son will be two in October.



    I know it's hard but try to stay positive, keep talking about it with hubby and your mum and most of all try to enjoy yourselfs.



    Thinking of you. xxx
  • Evie1979Evie1979 Posts: 13
    Thankyou guys. I'm feeling a bit more positive today. I suppose it's a bit of a rollercoaster! Scarletbride your story def made me feel better, like my hubby says i have to stay hopeful and it will happen for us. I have to be able to think that at my next hospital appt they will offer me something else that will work!! I'm not sure what the next stage is but I aim to be positive about the chances! Easier said than done though.



    Thanks again it was really good to be able to share with somebody rather than keep it all inside.



    xx
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