Getting back on my feet again after loss of our baby.

After the longest and worst 3 weeks of my life im slowly getting back on my feet.

Spent the first 2 weeks going to the hospital twice a day every 2 days for blood tests for my HCG and scans after I started to bleed heavily and had a pain in my right hand side. My HCG was rising but not enough for them to think it was a healthy pregnancy and after many scans they still couldn't find anything. I was told so many times I had miscarried and then told I hadn't I didnt know if I was coming or going.

I was booked in to go for an injection (methotrexate) to try and "flush out" the baby as they so nicely put it but things took a turn before that. On the Thursday before that I was in terrible pain again and had been to the hospital twice that day for my tests etc. The doctor wanted to keep me in and do something about it there and then but the consultant said no so I was sent home around 1.30. Over the afternoon things got worse so as soon as my husband got home from work I told him I had to go to the hospital. I phoned them on my way there because I was told to go straight in if things got worse and they told me to go home and wait to be phoned and told to come in but I said no I was on my way so they said I had to go to A&E! I walked in the doors of A&E, explained what was wrong and collapsed on the floor before my husband had even come in from parking the car. Wasn't aware of much after that but woke up many hours later to be told I'd had surgery to remove our baby and my fallopian tube which had ruptured due to an ectopic pregnancy.

Still very sore and tired as it's only been a week since my op but its been great having the support of friends and family even though we hadn't even told most of them I was pregnant yet. Just finding it hard cause I cant do much for myself and when Im sitting doing nothing your mind begins to wander and think about things too much.

I feel better having written it all down though, just hope I don't upset anyone by bring back any bad memories.


  • nikkiloouknikkiloouk Posts: 198
    i didnt want to just read and run

    my heart goes out to u and thinking about u at such a terrible time

    luv and hugs


  • My thoughts are with you at this awful time. It's good to see you have plenty of love and support around you.

  • Thinking of you x
  • LampiekatLampiekat Posts: 3,527
    Glad you feel better for writing it all down.

    My thoughts are with you

    Big hugs and a speedy recovery xxx
  • robstersgirlrobstersgirl Posts: 4,161

  • jules-xjules-x Posts: 458
    This happened to my friend last year and she's now mother to a gorge month old baby girl! You will be fine again it's jus terrible at the min. Love hugs n get well wishes xxx
  • Sorry to hear of your loss. What a harsh time for you...

    I loss three of my pregnancies, it took some time to get over but I have a two and half year old princess and just 7 weeks pregnant now. It will happen for you (hugs).

  • mrshelen74mrshelen74 Posts: 9,282
    hugs and best wishes hun

  • BevversBevvers Posts: 650
    My thoughts are with you & your husband xx

  • RhianJRhianJ Posts: 142
    Just to let you know I am thinking of you and your husband at this difficult time x
  • Smiffy2010Smiffy2010 Posts: 433
    I had two miscarriages before having my healthy boy who is sound asleep upstairs. Please please don't worry to much over things. My h2b has a daughter already so it was especially difficult to think i might not be able to give him a family of our own.

    But time and patience got us there in the end and we are closer than ever for the experience. It probably sounds ridiculous now but if i hadn't have had those two miscarriages i would never have my gorgeous perfect boy now.

    It takes time and believe me its much easier to concieve if your less stressed. We concieved my little bundle of joy on my birthday, my present was not only a healthy baby but an engagement ring - i was a happy bunny, stress free and not freting over things.

    You will still concive stressed im sure, but much quicker if your relaxed a little.

  • debwylie83debwylie83 Posts: 499
    A couple of my friends are midwifes and i was shocked to know just how common ectopic pregnancies my mum even had one after me and my sister but went on to have 5 of us in total. It will take time im sure i know i would find it really hard but if i was you i think i would be glad we hadnt told everyone yet that way you dont have to go through it all telling everyone who know this way you can gather your own thought first, thinking of you xx
  • MrsS to beMrsS to be Posts: 2,633
    Oh hun my heart goes out to you and your partner. My close friend had one last year, was awful. I had suspected she was pregnant and then I received a call from her sis to say she'd been to hospital and had an op due to an ectopic.

    It was a difficult time for both her and her husband, really tough. They did get through it, although i do beleive she was quietly suffering and wouldnt tell her husband exactly the pain she was feeling.

    She is now 6 months pregnant and everything going well.

    I guess my advice to you is to please get better, put your heads together and try and be optimistic about the future.

    Wishing you lots of luck, take care xx
  • bigburd,

    I've been looking at this website for weeks now (getting married next year!), but only decided to register after seeing your post.

    I suffered from a ruptured ectopic pregnancy in May this year after collepsing in my home. I had no idea I was pregnant as I had what I thought was 2 periods, and ended up losing 2.8 litres of blood and like you, have had one of my fallopian tubes removed.

    My recovery was difficult. I went in to shock, but had lots of lovely people around me and a month off work to make myself feel 'normal' again. Its still very emotional. I've found that where as before my pregnancy I did not really think about children (I'm only 22), but now its all I can think about. I'm absolutely terrified of it happening again.

    Phyically, it took about 3 1/2 weeks to recover and 3 months to be able to exercise again, but I'm still getting there emotionally.

    Sending you all my best wishes. Its still very raw for me, but getting better.

  • Thanks for all the kind words from everyone.

    Im now back at work this week and have been to counciling and feeling more like my old self each day.

    Only 4 weeks to go and we can start trying all over again.
  • RedRose79RedRose79 Posts: 1,938
    Fingers crossed for the next time honey. I'm so sorry to hear what you've had to go through and can't offer any decent words really xxx

  • Didn't want to read and run

    I'm so sorry to hear of what has happened, thinkin of you and your husband and wish you a speedy recovery.

    *Hugs* Take Care xxx
  • Lots of love Bigburd, all the very best for you both, xxx
  • Hi,

    I have been through exactly what you have hunni, my thoughts are with you and all i can say is that things do get back to normal but i will never forget my loss, we are still ttc after our ectopic but im hopeful it will happen soon. If you want to ask anything please get in touch. Take care

    carly x
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