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To Try or not to try


I know only my husband and I can make this decision but I would love some of your views. We are ready to TTC as we are stable, we both have permanent jobs that pay ok and we have just bought our own home. We feel very settled and emotionally ready for the next step but we both have a nagging doubt about our finances after our child is born. I am born worrier and I know I am over thinking things but I worry about childcare costs. Our life is comfortable now but due to my own childhood experience I don't want to struggle for money. We have thought ahead about how we would cope whilst I am on maternity leave but I can't get my head around other long term expenses. The only thing stopping us is my worry about how we cope year after year financially and I know I am being ridiculous but I need to have a plan or be assured it's not as as bad as I think it will be! Sorry for rambling. 

My question is, is this something you have considered before taking the plunge?


  • Little-pickleLittle-pickle Posts: 1,136

    In my opinion no matter how much you earn you will never truly be able to "afford" a baby! They are expensive but you adapt and change your life style to make it work. why not spend 6 month saving and so you know you have some thing to fall back on if need be? 

    if this is your first home together I might suggest waiting a year just to see how finances sort out as things can work out more expensive than you anticipated or a lot less. 


  • MrsTwizbeMrsTwizbe Posts: 3,352 New bride

    Great advice Mrs-S. My husband is the same. We are not in a bad finacial situation at all, but he also wanted us to save for a few months before we started trying - partly so we could afford an amazing holiday to kick start the trying, but also so that we had a good cushion if I decided not to go back to work.

    He is a worrier as well and I think he needed that time to get in control about the impact on our lives. It took us about a year to get to his saving target.

    I think it will be tougher finacially after a bubba turns up but we will manage.

  • My husband and I are in exactly the same position. We are thinking to start trying for a family this winter but I am concerned about whether or not we can afford it.

    We are both in full time permanent work, have a mortgage, cars, are married, etc., but the thought of cutting my pay significantly is quite scary for me. Ideally, I'd like to go back to work full time eventually, but I want to wait and see how I cope with life as a mum before making any huge decisions.

    As others have suggested, could you perhaps start saving now so that you have a bit of a cushion should you find that you need a bit of extra cash now and again? That's my plan from now until we start trying.

  • doorstopperdoorstopper Posts: 1,674

    We're in a comfortable financial situation and started trying without having worked out any finances really. Childcare is absolutely the big one and we've had a massive wake-up call having visited nurseries this week - in our area in NW England, prices range from £217-£271 a week for a full-time place. You'll cope with it whatever happens and I wouldn't ever say don't do it because of money (there are always ways to work it out), but do be sensible about it. And make a spreadsheet! image

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