TTC 34 - 2019 / 2020 babies! 👶

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  • OmRumOmRum Posts: 896 New bride
    Well done, Hannah. your writing was honest and captured how lonely it is to be a couple struggling with miscarriages. Apart from online communities (mainly aimed at women), I don't know of any support groups where I would go to if I had the sad misfortune of suffering a miscarriage, and I wouldn't even know how to tell people it had happened. I expect even going to the GP only offers you the usual generic counselling or antidepressants. As you say, 1 in 4 couples will experience a miscarriage, and yet there's no obvious help out there.
  • MrsMinMarch2016MrsMinMarch2016 Posts: 493 New bride
    edited April 2019

    Oh Hannah I’m sitting at my desk swallowing my tears, my heart really does go out to you - you have been through far too much. You should indeed be very proud of your post and for sharing your story,  its so beautifully written, I’m sure it will help many others going through similar heartbreak.  It sounds like you and your partner have a great relationship and the plans to mark the due dates is a beautiful sentiment.  I just know one day you will get your happy ending.

    Tallie sorry about your BFN, I don’t think the strip tests are the best especially before missed AF so hope you’re not out yet.  Your appt sounds like a joke! I would definitely complain. Haha it’s always nice to have some encouragement lol. God knows you bloody need it with the SMEP, I’m knackered already!!

    Mrsragdoll I personally loved GOT, I think a lot of people were expecting more action but I knew it would be more a catch up, I loved all the reunions and revelations!! Apparently episode 3 is 90 minutes long so reckon that wil be when the action is!

    No news here, CD14 and still no sign of OV…so the BD’ing continues!!

    GL for anyone due to test, we’re definitely overdue a BFP or 2 on this thread.


  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 3,969 New bride
    MrsMin I agree that SMEP is knackering! Hubbs is being a champ but I know even he is like 'enough now' lol.

    Ditto here, CD14 and no positive OPK... but I'm thinking I might be OV as I'm getting the peeing a lot thing.

    Hope you all have some nice plans for the Easter weekend! I don't have anything, but as the weather is supposed to be nice I'm sure we will go on some nice walks and things.
  • Tallie237Tallie237 Posts: 367 New bride
    Mrsmin and Sammykate hope O happens for you both soon so you get a rest 😂

    I've started spotting so 99% sure I'm out. We really are due some BFPs soon!
  • MrsRagdollMrsRagdoll Posts: 258 New bride

    Hannah your piece is beautifully written and I am sure it will make a difference to someone reading it who has gone through the same as you. I cannot even imagine your heartbreak but I am certain you will have a baby in your arms one day in the not too distant future.

    Sorry you've started spotting Tallie. I've just had a small show as well so I think I'm probably out a well!

  • MrsPope2018MrsPope2018 Posts: 1,338 New bride
    Hannah that is so beautifully written and you are amazing for sharing your story like that. I feel like I could have written the first part of that myself, clinging onto a tiny bit of hope that the pregnancy test would come back positive, knowing full well that it wouldn't, the most heartbreaking pregnancy test you will ever take. I cannot imagine how you must feel and how you have picked yourself up after recurrent losses, I honestly dont think I would be strong enough. You are so right the support out there isn't great, I was very lucky that I had an incredibly supportive GP who referred me for counselling, have you thought about that? I dont know if you think it would help? Unfortunately the counsellor I spoke to wasnt great and I didn't pursue it any further but I know it's very helpful for some people. 

    I'm glad you have your referral through but sorry its such a long wait, I hope the time passes quickly, when did you say your trip away was? 


  • MrsPope2018MrsPope2018 Posts: 1,338 New bride
    Wow MrsP a marathon is amazing!! Although kinda hope you cant do it because your pregnant Haha. 

    Good luck MrsMin and sammykate I hope Ov happens soon for you both, especially so you can have a break from the SMEP 🤣🤣

    Sorry about the spotting Tallie and Ragdoll 😔

    Not much going on with me, CD7 AF is completely gone now thankfully. My app predicts I'm in my fertile window from tomorrow so I will start the opks then. We are going to BD slightly less this cycle (which really feels counter productive lol) so will wait until I get a positive opk I think. Really cant wait for my husbands appointment next week so we can decide where to next. I obviously dont want him to have any issues but at least if there is something then we can try and plan where to go from here, atm with my bloods all being normal i dont know what we do if his stuff all comes back normal as well. I guess we will cross that bridge when we come to it. 

    Hope you all have a good Easter weekend, we are going away for the night Friday with some friends and I have the next 3 days off work which is nice. Off to watch hubby play rugby this evening seeing as the weather is good!
  • MrsN82MrsN82 Posts: 212 New bride
    Hi ladies, I hope you don’t mind me thread hoping but in light of Hannah’s post for the miscarriage association I wanted to just let you know of a couple of resources of support in case you need it, obviously I hope you never do but it may also help you Hannah as I agree the support out there is very non existent especially as it is a subject we are trying to get rid of the stigma and to get people to be more open about.

    www.petalscharity.org.uk - Baby loss councilling service
    www.tommys.org
    www.arc-uk.org 

    xx
  • MrsRagdollMrsRagdoll Posts: 258 New bride

    Good morning everyone :) hurrah for faux Friday and 4 whole days off work!

    Thank you MrsN for those links, I agree that lots needs to be done to reduce the stigma around miscarriages. I am finding it is becoming more opening discussed but we are not there yet.

    I haven't had any more spotting since yesterday but I've just had my one painful cramp which I usually get just as AF starts to expect she'll be here in the next few hours. I am NEVER late so if by some miracle AF doesn't arrive today I'll test tomorrow morning as I am planning to drink a LOT of wine this weekend. I ordered 20 bottles from Aldi which are due to arrive today. Very excited!

  • MrsPope2018MrsPope2018 Posts: 1,338 New bride
    Haha Ragdoll that sounds like a great weekend 🤣🥂
  • MrsRagdollMrsRagdoll Posts: 258 New bride
    Haha Ragdoll that sounds like a great weekend 🤣🥂

    Hahaha Just realised that makes me sounds like an alcoholic! Not all 20 bottles are for me this weekend. My husband got a wine fridge for his birthday so I'm filling that! Although I'm sure I can polish off a fair amount over the 4 days!
  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 3,969 New bride

    I will be impressed if you get through all 20 of those bottles! Fingers crossed for you though that AF doesn't arrive.

    Pretty sure I was OV yesterday- thanks for nothing, OPKs. Never managed to get even close to a positive!

  • MrsPope2018MrsPope2018 Posts: 1,338 New bride
    Haha I'd be extremely impressed if you managed all that 🤣 

    Sammykate how frustrating!what makes you think you've ovulated? I know how you feel with the opks, I could never get anything more than the faintest if lines on the strip ones and used to worry so much that I want ovulating. 

    I'm going to start my opks today. Just waiting until I need another wee 🤣🙈
  • OmRumOmRum Posts: 896 New bride
    Party at MrsRagdoll's! My husband wants a wine fridge for our new flat. At the moment I'm trying to drink through our hundreds of bottles so there's fewer to move!
  • Tallie237Tallie237 Posts: 367 New bride
    Wow Ragdoll dont think my weekend plans can live up to that 😂 

    Whens O predicted mrspope?

    Sammykate what makes you think O was yesterday?

    I've had more spotting this morning so sure AF will be here in full force tomorrow right on time! Just at the stage of wanting to get on with the next cycle now.
  • MrsRagdollMrsRagdoll Posts: 258 New bride

    Sorry you've had more spotting Tallie. Do you usually spot a few days before AF?

    Does anyone know how you @ someone's name on here? I always see it on other threads but can't work out how to do it myself :D

  • MrsPope2018MrsPope2018 Posts: 1,338 New bride
    @Tallie237 I think around Tuesday or Wednesday, usually get my positive opk CD12 which is Monday. Sorry you've had more spotting, it's good that your cycle is so regular, but it's so frustrating at the same time isn't it. I keep thinking if I'm that regular why hasn't it happened! 

    I almost feel like we are not trying this month even though I'm going opks. Because hubby is worried about the possibility of a low sperm count he wants to just wait and only BD once I get a positive opk. It doesn't feel right when we are used to BDing as much as possible 🤣 but keep reminding myself that last time I managed to get a BFP we literally DTD once in my fertile week.  Its quite nice taking the pressure off though I must admit although I feel a little bit like we are wasting a cycle. At least after his apt next week we will hopefully have some more ideas about what's going on. 
  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 3,969 New bride

    Sorry about the spotting Tallie.

    I think O was yesterday as I needed to pee all the time, which I know some of you ladies get around O- so I checked CM and cervical position (which I had also checked a few days prior for comparison reasons) and all signs point to it. Not as easy as an OPK but they were not playing ball! I know what you mean though, you start to think you're not OV and something is wrong- literally never worried about that before doing OPKs! Annnnd up until a couple of months ago I never thought I'd be typing about checking my cervical position. This TTC stuff can be pretty intense and take over your life a bit can't it?

    MrsPope you only need the one time... fingers crossed!

    Weekend plans involve now popping into London on Saturday as it's supposed to be 24c! Will probably go to Spittlefields market and eat way too much overpriced street food.

  • MrsRagdollMrsRagdoll Posts: 258 New bride
    @MrsPope2018 I have read that you shouldn't DTD too infrequently as the sperm only live for a few days so if you don't DTD the dead ones in the seminal fluid can make it harder for the alive ones to swim. I think as long as it's only been a max of 4 days since the last ejaculation then it should be fine. Just something to think about :)
  • Wow MrsRagdoll 20 bottles is a good effort  :D Sounds like an epic wkd! Hubby is inevitably working most of the Easter wkd so I'll be spending most of it annoying my mom and sister most likely!

    Sorry about your spotting Tallie I hope you're not out yet.

    OV is also messing me around this mth, I miscounted the other day so i'm actually CD16 today although last mth didnt OV till CD 18/19. Got a dark line on OPK (but not darker than control) last night and this morning but this afternoon it's faint again :(  I have got EWCM but no cramps so don't know whats going on! I know with SMEP you're supposed to do it every day for 3 days once positive OPK but since no obvious positive I think I'll just continue with every other day.

    Don't think its probably helped OV that I've been mega stressed since yesterday, my little girls nursery have somehow managed to lose her beloved bunny comforter shes had since a baby and takes everywhere with her! It took us over an hour to get her to sleep last night without it where as she normally goes straight down, she just kept crying 'bunny, bunny'.  Broke our hearts!!  Bloody idiots feel like ripping someones head off!!!! Nothing like a mother scorned hahaha
  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 3,969 New bride

    Aww MrsMin sorry about your little girls bunny. Maybe one of the other kids took it home by accident and it will turn up soon. Stress definitely doesn't help with TTC! Many things I'm trying not to stress about too, waiting for the results of an xray on my wrist for one thing. TTC itself is stressful- very counter productive!

    At least DH seems to be enjoying himself, if the texts I get during the day asking if I 'need the D later' are anything to go by *rolls eyes*

  • MrsRagdollMrsRagdoll Posts: 258 New bride
    AF just arrived! If nothing else I am as regular as can be!
  • MrsPope2018MrsPope2018 Posts: 1,338 New bride
    Sorry Ragdoll 😞  enjoy your wine this weekend!

    Sammykate that did make me laugh about your husbands texts 🤣
  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 3,969 New bride
    Sorry Ragdoll! Next month maybe!
  • Update -  bunny is back in the building!! Turns out it was put in another parents bag. Phew pass me the wine! 😅

  • Sorry about AF ragdoll at least those 20 bottles won’t be going to waste and yes lucky to be so regular!

    Haha Sammy my husband is the same he’s loving pretending it’s a chore but secretly enjoying the harassment!

    So after 2 dark but not positive OPKs I’ve gone completely faint now, I’m so confused I felt for sure I was going to get a blazer tonight ☹️






  • Tallie237Tallie237 Posts: 367 New bride
    Mrsragdoll yes spotting for a day or 2 is normal for me, it's almost always brown or pink and then AF arrives in full force. I had a few cycles of spotting really early like 7dpo! Thankfully that's now stopped. Sorry AF got you, enjoy your weekend 🥂

     Mrspope yes I'm pleased it's so regular but then it does just make you wonder why it hasn't happened yet! I actually mentioned to the doctor that my cycle length varies (28-36 days ish) but my period is always 2 weeks after a positive opk and he said that still counted as regular so that's good! It always feels counter productive not dtd like crazy doesn't it 😂 I think I might try that approach this cycle too though just incase it's a sperm count problem here too.

     Sammykate that's good that all signs point to O, I'd trust that over opks. Like this cycle I got a positive opk but I knew I hadn't ovulated yet as no ewcm etc and looks like I was right! True this is quite an intense journey and you learn a lot about your body!

     Glad you got bunny back Mrsmin! How old is your little girl? I think I'd count that as positive but if you're not sure then keep testing just in case it builds back up again. So frustrating when you expect a blazer-I never got one either this cycle just two equally strong lines. If in doubt just keep dtd 😂

     AF not here yet, but I have backache and light cramps (cramps have been on and off since Saturday!) and the spotting the last 2 days so it's just a waiting game now! I started temping this month albeit after O as the thermometer didn't come in time and my temp hasn't dropped yet so I'm not sure if that means AF might end up being late or not! Enjoy the long weekend everyone!
  • MrsPope2018MrsPope2018 Posts: 1,338 New bride
    Tallie 🤞 the temps mean that AF wont show up at all!!
  • Tallie I’m still very new to temping but I have also read the continued rise in temp is a very good sign  :# Have everything crossed for u!!!

    Hallie is 2 yrs 3 mths. So obviously bunny is her life!!! Ahh what I would give for life to be that uncomplicated again!!!



     
  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 3,969 New bride
    Tallie fingers and toes crossed for you!!
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