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Due March/April 2020

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  • @MrsMinMarch2016, really glad you spoke to the EPU, I think that extra bit of reassurance can make all the difference.
    Not going to lie, my job is pretty stressful. I am trying to be sensible and leave at reasonable times, but until I announce it’s difficult.
    I’ve packed my bag up tomorrow with a bizarre little care package of things that will get me through 6 hours of meetings without feeling too sick. Trying to decide if taking a bottle of gaviscon will raise too many eyebrows?

    Thanks @Mrs17, I haven’t got too much on this weekend, we’ve got our private scan Sunday morning which I’m now starting to look forward to. I have high hopes of lying on the sofa in stretchy clothes watching crappy tv for many hours this weekend.

    @mrsfbc, really glad your scan went well. I’m sure having a reassuring scan has done wonders for your stress levels. My Fitbit sleep charts were all over the place in the run up to mine and the night after I had the longest solid run of deep sleep I’ve ever seen on my charts before.

    Just to add to all the fun, my hubby is now poorly. He messaged me around lunchtime to say he didn’t feel good, then about 3pm to say he’d had to leave work early because he was shivery and achey. When I got home he’d moved himself into our 2nd bedroom and was sleeping in there because he’s not risking me catching it.  Feels so weird sitting in our bed with him in another room! I think he’s got a point though, he’s running a temp even with paracetamol and I really don’t want to catch anything right now.
  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 4,014 New bride
    Mrsfbc I was the same at my 6 week scan which I had due to severe cramping. I felt very matter of fact 'oh good there's a baby and a heartbeat' about it and I think I was just way too nervous and stressed out to be happy. Hubby said he got really emotional so I felt had I was so cold about it!

    Mrsseebee hope your hubby is feeling better soon. Mine came down with the flu a few months ago and spent a week in the spare room- it definitely felt weird!

    So nervous about the 12 week scan today. I don't think it helps that the larger baby forum I'm on has March due date people constantly posting about MMC at their scan. Its very different to here in that there's hundreds of members and I don't really know any of them so they seem to only post when things go wrong. I definitley need to step away as I'm just winding myself up with it.
  • Hi Ladies, 

    I hope you don't mind if I join you? I was part of the TTC thread at the beginning of the year but came away from it all and decided to not try/not prevent.

    We got our BFP yesterday and I've spoken to the doctor today who has told me I'm 6 weeks and 2 days and I have a due date of 14th April 2020. 

    This is my second pregnancy (the first one being in 2002!) and this one has to be closely monitored as I am 41 years old and I had blood clots in my lungs 3 years ago. 

    My next job is to book a midwife appointment.

    Hope all of you ladies are doing well xxx 
  • MrsPope2018MrsPope2018 Posts: 1,375 New bride
    Congratulations MrsCarnegie!! I wondered where you had disappeared to! Good to know that they will be monitoring you closely. Wishing you a happy and healthy 9 months 😊
  • Thank you MrsPope 😊 It's still all a bit surreal right now.

    How are you doing? When is your due date? 
  • OmRumOmRum Posts: 942 New bride
    Hello MrsCarnegie! I've been wondering how you were getting on. Congratulations on the BFP. I'm 6 weeks and 4 days, apparently due on 12 April, so we're almost due date twins. I'm just waiting on the midwives to contact me about an appointment.

    Sammykate, best of luck with your scan today.

    Unfortunately my doctor's appointment wasn't great. It all happened exactly as I expected it would, with him basically telling me everyone has different symptoms and everyone gets anxious, which was absolutely no help at all. He referred me for counselling with the same people I've had counselling with in the past (and it's never helped). I am besides myself with anxiety now (I can't sleep and when I do I have horrific nightmares about miscarrying). I don't know whether I ought to wait for my midwife appointment, which might not be for several weeks, or just try to scrounge together the money for a private scan to ease my mind. The cheapest one I can find nearby is £70.
  • @MrsCarnegie congratulations!! So nice to have you join us, good to see the thread getting busier now!

    @Sammykate good luck today, what times your scan?? Its natural to worry about MMC, it seems I can read and read other threads but only really take in the bad stuff even though there its lots of good stuff there too!

    @mrseebe2be hope your care package gets you through your day!!! 


  • Thank you Mrs Min and OmRum. Its lovely to be joining you.

    I'm sorry to hear you're having a horrible time OmRum, sending hugs your way. Hopefully we can journey along together xx 
  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 4,014 New bride
    Scan went well, very relieved! Just so nice to see baby in there wriggling around and waving. We both think its a boy! Baby is now dated as being due 29th Feb... leap year baby!! I hope it hangs on a couple of days and we get a March baby instead.

    Welcome MrsCarneige and congrats!

    Sorry your appointment was useless Omrum :( have you looked in Groupon for private scans, I've heard of people finding them half price on there
  • @sammykate just thread hopping to say I am delighted you're scan went well, so pleased for you :) Keeping an eye on your progress and still hoping to be joining soon (no update from my end, sob)

    @omrum i am so sorry to hear you are finding things difficult. It is understandable that the pregnancy has triggered your anxiety, you are definitely not alone in that, and I am sorry your GP wasn't more supportive. I have never found 'talking therapy' helpful with my anxieties in the past either. It sounds as if a private scan would really help to put your mind at rest, so if you can possibly afford it I would try and go for that - as some of the others said I think you might be able to find vouchers online. Keeping fingers crossed for you, I am sure it will all work out well.

    Hope everyone else is OK and apologies for the interruption! :) X
  • @sammykate so pleased all went well!! Congratulations! Have you read into the nub theory to tell if its a boy or girl?? Any signs???

    I have had my letter through for my scan date, 3rd sept when the nhs think I will be 12+2 according to LMP but i'm pretty sure I'll be 11 wks exactly due to late ovulation, so not sure if they will be able to do everything they need to or whether I'll end up going back.

    @omrum sorry to hear you're having such a rough time, all I can assure you is the worry does lessen as the pregnancy progresses but will never disappear completely but that is completely normal for any parent! I have used this miscarriage reassurer a few times when I'm feeling worried and it does calm me down a bit if it is of any help -

    https://datayze.com/miscarriage-reassurer.php
  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 4,014 New bride
    MrsMin I don't think I can see a nub in the picture, can you? I think I did see it sticking straight up at one point in the scan but I was probably looking at a hand or something!



    At least s/he is giving us a nice wave!

    Thanks Anxiousbride hope to have you joining us soon!
  • Welcome @MrsCarnegie!

    @Sammykate Aw! Look at your scan pic! I love how they look like proper babies at the 12 week scan. Glad it went well.

    @OmRum sorry your Dr wasn’t more help, think Sammykate is right, try looking for voucher offers for an early scan. I won’t say I’m not still a bit anxious after mine, but seeing the baby really did help. 

    @MrsMinMarch2016 Thank you, weirdly I didn’t feel sick today, if anything, really hungry. I’ve been yawning in my meeting since 12:30, my boobs hurt so much I actually winced at one point and the gap between my first and second wee of the meeting was 20 minutes! I had to pretend I needed to deal with a message on my phone because it was such a short gap that another loo break just seemed ridiculous!

    Hubby’s still tucked up in his sick bed so I’ve got the TV remote to myself. My Mum and SIL were telling me last night I should be watching Emma Willis Delivering Babies. Trying to decide if that’s a huge mistake that might just freak me out, like watching One Born Every Minute?
  • MrsPB2019MrsPB2019 Posts: 832 New bride
    Just jumping in to say I’ve been watching the Emma Willis programme and for me it’s informative. Can see how it freaks some people out so I guess depends what kind of person you are? There was an emergency c section in this weeks episode that was scary. But I also saw a placenta being birthed and that was interesting to me as I wondered what happened.
  • Hi @MrsPB2019 I ended up watching an episode and I enjoyed it. I’ve watched One Born Every Minute before and I enjoyed it when I wasn’t pregnant, but was a bit worried about seeing mid birth medical emergencies while pregnant and finding it all a bit more real and personal.
    I did cry watching the one tonight, but that’s partly my hormones. Hubby had me watch the first episode of Ricky Gervais’ Derek the other night and at the poignant bit near the end I was, and I quote Hubby here: “A sobbing mess”.  :D
  • MrsPB2019MrsPB2019 Posts: 832 New bride
    I think I’ve cried at every baby being born so far on this programme. Ah hormones 😂
  • @Sammykate no I can't see the nub, looks like babys hand is covering where it may have been so the cheeky rascal clearly doesn't want you to know yet!! Lovely scan photo though and the little wave is so cute!

    I'm loving the Emma Willis series and have also cried at every birth  :D I was in bits at the emergency C-section this wk when they were struggling to get baby out even though I knew everything would be okay.  The good thing is with this and OBEM is they won't show the worst outcomes. 

    In fact my good friend whos also a work colleague was on OBEM when she had her little girl! I've always said as much as I couldn't imagine the nation seeing me in labour I am very jealous that she has that footage for life now and her daughter can watch her entry into this world which I think is amazing, especially as my labour with my daughter is a complete blur and can only remember little bits, I would love to watch it back!!! Anyway the producer text her the other day about a new show they are making following mothers pregnancy journeys through to birth and asked if she knew anyone due to give birth in the birmingham area!! I'm very tempted...
  • mrsfbcmrsfbc Posts: 103 New bride
    @OmRum it’s awful when Drs are not understanding, is there anyway to see a different dr in the surgery? Also might sound silly but have you tried a mindfulness app or anything like that? Maybe just to try and relax before bedtime or when you are feeling at your worse? Hope you are ok x

    @Sammykate what a fab scan! There is also a skull theory, something to do with if it’s quite protruding at the forehead it’s a boy and if it’s flatter it’s a girl? 

    Havent watched that Emma Willis programme and think I’ll give it a miss for a bit as I’m crying about everything at the moment! 

    Have a had a a much better couple of days with much less sickness and haven’t had to have a nap the last two days either even though I’m knackered by 7pm! 
  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 4,014 New bride
    Mrsfbc I've looked up skull theory and I still can't decide which it looks like lol. Baby definitley wants to keep it a secret!

    I've not watched Emma Wilson but I could never really cope with One Born, like I know birth will be really painful but I still don't want to see women screaming in pain for hours lol. Maybe I'm a wuss.
  • OmRumOmRum Posts: 942 New bride
    @mrsfbc I've tried mindfulness and mediating and yoga and all sorts, but it doesn't help, unfortunately. I just can't seem to quiet the mind.

    @MrsMinMarch2016 Thanks for the link. It was reassuring to see it in statistics.

    I don't watch much tv so not heard of this Emma Wilson programme. I am shamefully ignorant on giving birth, so perhaps it is something I ought to consider watching! Everything I know I got from Call the Midwife...
  • Morning Ladies!

    How’s everyone this weekend?

    Hubby is feeling much better, which is a relief. He’s still sleeping in the second bedroom so we can reduce the risk of cross infection. My bladder woke me up at half six this morning and then I felt my usual pre-breakfast nausea, so I’m sitting it bed having breakfast, my solitary coffee of the day and watching another episode of Emma Willis. I’ve already cried. I cried watching tv last night too. Hubby finds it very amusing and sits grinning at me.

    We have our private scan tomorrow morning. I’m still a bit nervous, but I’m also a bit excited. We should get a picture this time, even though I’m aware at 9.5 weeks it will still look more crustacean than baby.

    @OmRum it sounds like practical reassurance is much better for you than the mindfulness and talking therapies?
  • OmRumOmRum Posts: 942 New bride
    Best of luck with the scan, @Mrsseebe2be. How exciting!

    You're right that practical and logical reassurance is best for me. I remembered yesterday that my uncle's wife used to be district midwife of my local area, so I'm tempted to try and get in contact with her - but it might be weird me suddenly asking for her number and calling her out of the blue!

    I've got my parents and Grandma coming today and I don't know whether to tell them. I'm seven weeks today so it still feels a bit too early. The same with some close friends I'm meeting tomorrow - two have recently had babies so it might be reassuring to chat to them. Plus one is moving across the country on Wednesday and I'd rather tell her face to face!
  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 4,014 New bride
    MrsSeebee good luck in your scan today!

    Omrum I think when to tell people is a very personal choice. We decided to wait until after the 12 week scan for everyone except my Sister but I'm quite a private person so would have found it incredibly hard to go around telling everyone bad news if we didn't wait and something went wrong. Even now I'm thinking should we have waited until after we got the Downs screening results back!
    On the other hand some people argue its better to tell people early so you have a support network if something goes wrong.

    I would also be tempted to tell the friend if she's moving away! Just keep in mind once the secret is out there's a chance it could get out out. My friend was furious that her husband's sister leaked their engagement news on Facebook before they had announced. I'm feeling nervous about that happening although we've made clear to people we've told that it's not public yet so shhh.
  • Good luck with the scan today MrsSeebee 😊

    I agree with Sammykate that telling people is a personal choice. I told people very early in my 1st pregnancy, but that was in 2002, before social media. This time we have told some close family and friends, but we've made it clear to those we have told that it's still shhh.

    I hope everyone is having a good weekend. I'm constantly plagued with morning sickness which is hindering my enjoyment right now. Did you ladies suffer for long? I'm never actually sick, just feel nauseous throughout the day x 
  • MrsMinMarch2016MrsMinMarch2016 Posts: 510 New bride
    edited August 2019
    @omrum we told our moms & sisters plus my best friend straight away we r very close & knew if the worst happened we would count on their support. Because I was so sick in the early days as wel & i see my mom almost every day there’s no way I would’ve been able to hide it!! We just made a point of telling them it’s very early days & no one else can know yet. It’s completely personal but if u hav a close family maybe it would help your anxiety to be able to be more open about it, it may even add to ur anxiety trying to hide it for another 5/6 wks.

    Good luck for ur scan today @mrsee2be

    @MrsCarnegie ur nausea sounds exactly the same as mine was. How far gone r u now? Although I stil get the odd bit mine almost completely disappeared at about 9 wks whereas I was fully expecting it til the 2nd trimester! Everyone’s different but hope it doesn’t last much longer for u it’s awful. With me I found it just helped to snack when I felt nauseous, water biscuits / babybels / bagels being my fave! 

    1 wk 2 days till scan day...please hurry up!!!



  • Morning Ladies, thank you for your positive thoughts. We got to see our little bean again and everything is fine. Upside down because of my retroverted uterus, but healthy and wriggling away like mad. The sonographer and assistant actually started coo-ing and laughing at how much kicking and wriggling there was. You could even see it’s little knees bending. Apparently they’d struggled to get much movement on the rest of their scans this morning so really enjoyed mine, which was nice.
    Hubby didn’t realise there’d be movement yet, so he was really surprised. We’re at 26mm, which is bang on size, and a huge change from 9mm 2 and a bit weeks ago.

    @OmRum the telling people is as others have said, totally a matter of personal choice. Last time hubby and I told our respective parents purely because we were going away with his mum for the weekend and felt she’d notice. As it was when we had our miscarriage it was easier having them know so they could be supportive. We told siblings after the fact and it was much harder to tell them when they came from a position of no knowledge.
    This time we’ve opted to tell parents and siblings up front. We won’t be telling anyone else until after the 12 week scan, but we want the support network around us in case anything does go wrong.
    Ultimately do whatever feels right for you.
    I don’t think it’d be that weird asking for your Uncle’s wife’s number. Talking to someone experienced could be really helpful for you.


  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 4,014 New bride
    Glad the scan went really well Mrsseebee! How lovely baby was super active.

    We told the Mother in law today, I think hubby expected her to cry but she was a bit 'oh okay' about it! I think she needed a while to process as she did get happier after a while. She did immediately start with the advice, which as she's Chinese can be a bit 'out there'. She spent all afternoon trying to feed me mushrooms which I hate so the baby isn't allergic to mushrooms. Not happening. And apparently we aren't allowed to buy anything new at all for the baby as it's bad luck. Which we will definitely be ignoring especially when it comes to car seats lol.
    I did manage to escape the house minus the 'maternity dress' she tried to give me which was the most ghastly white cotton granny nightie saved from her last pregnancy 33 years ago.
  • Mrs17Mrs17 Posts: 876 New bride
    Tried to have a quick catch up but theres been a flurry of activity!! 

    @Mrsseebe2be what a lovely scan pic!! 

    Your last post made me chuckle @Sammykate! The old fashions are coming back mind 😂
  • Thanks Sammykate and Mrs17! We’ve sent the picture to our parents, my mum got very excited!

    Sammykate I love the idea of you inheriting ancient maternity wear! There’s preloved and there’s taking things to extremes. Definitely with you on the new car seat.
  • Beautiful scan pic MrsSeebee 😊 

    Sammykate, your post did make me chuckle 😂

    MrsMinMarch I am 6 weeks and 5 days. I'm hoping I'll be lucky enough to be rid by 9 weeks as teaching secondary school kids is hard enough as it is! 
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