Attn Kazzacb10

Hi, sorry for 'attentioning' you! But i just read your thread about just finding out you're pregnant and will be 43 when baby arrived...i've just found out too that i'm pregnant and will be 39 so i just wanted to say Congratulations to you and its good to know that theres another mum out there like me!

Hope all goes well for you, and i'm trying to get a docs appt now but for the past 2 hours the surgerys phone has been constantly engaged!



Lots and lots of best wishes

xx

Posts

  • Congratulations thirlwall. Hope all goes well for you. I must admit to being very scared due to my age and the fact that I had so many problems last time. At least I know I am not alone in being an older mum now.



    Good thing about our surgery is that we can book appointments on-line and I love that facility. Only problem was I couldn't use it to book the pregnancy confirmation apppointment.



    Best wishes to you and keep in touch xx
  • Hi



    Thanks for the reply!



    I finally managed to get an appt for friday, a bit early probably but i've had problems too (old eggs apparantly?!), so i'm pretty nervous too. I just thought i'd get the pregnancy registered so if there are any problems again then at least it will be recorded that i'd conceived again.



    When are you seeing the doc?



    Be great to keep in touch, and really am keeping every crossed for the both of us! (thats me and you, not baby and me!)(Although i am doing that too!)



    Take lots of care



    Natx
  • Hi Nat



    Good luck with the appointment. I am going tomorrow morning. It would appear that I don't have problems conceiving! Apparently my mother was the same, although she had a lot of miscarriages. Knowing what I know now I do wonder if some of them were brought on by violence. Last time my blood pressure rocketed in week 26 and medication didn't seem to control it and I had my daughter at 31+4. I am due to get married at week 26 - this baby was so not planned! I don't want to go on honeymoon to a foreign country in case the same thing happens again. I already have high blood pressure that is being treated. I can only hope that the best of Addenbrookes will see me through this.



    Look after yourself.



    Karen xx
  • Hi Karen!



    Good luck at the docs tomorrow...let us know how you got on......i suppose the only plus side to having a history of pregnancy difficulties is that you do seem to get a bit more TLC, or so i have found.



    Wow, you really have a lot going on now then,with the wedding too.....when do you get married? It would seem a tricky decision as to whether to go abroad during such a precious time as 26 weeks, especially as you had problems before at that time.



    I don't think i have any trouble actually conceiving too! This is my 5th pregnancy, and i already have an 11 and 12 year old! But my husband and i (only married since November!) think its really important to have an expression of us both in one little person, and so that there is always a part of him and i on this plain....... a bit heavy, but true. Both of us have come from very different but still very heartbreaking paths, so we both just live life to the full.



    Hope you find some time to put your feet up and get some 'you' time!



    Take care



    Natx
  • Hi Nat



    Went OK at the doctors - filled in loads of forms and got referred to Addenbrookes and need to wait for the date for the scan.



    This will be my partner's first child. His first wife was a lot older than him and couldn't have any more children when they got married. She was very ill with cancer for a large part of their marriage and died 3 years ago to the date we found out that I was pregnant. We knew each other at school and met up after his wife died and my marriage broke down. I wanted to have a baby with him but got scared as I got older. My very unhappy marriage ended when I realised that I could survive without relying on my husband's income and the realisation that a baby would reduce me to relying on a man again scared me too. However, now that it is confirmed I am really happy. Needless to say he is grinning like a mad man at work! One of the girls in the office at his work has announced she is pregnant and one of the other guys has a wife who is expecting. Obviously something in the water!



    I am going to see my own doctor in a couple of weeks and will discuss with him what I should or shouldn't do about going away.



    Let me know how you get on on Friday.



    Karen x
  • Nat



    Forgot to say - wedding is on 19 July. At least it is all planned and I am just sitting back waiting for it to happen. The dress might be a problem!



    Karen x
  • Hi Karen



    Glad all went well and hope the wait for the next appt comes around quick!



    This is such a coincidence, but my husbands wife died three years ago from cancer too, and we met in the school playground after he moved into the area........my divorce was annouced decree absolute in court the day his wife died, and we didn't even know of each others existence.......... He was having a really hard time months and months later and so he went to the docs for some help, and he told him that 'you never know whats going to happen tomorrow', and the very next day he came up to me in the playground and asked if my son could go round to play after school with his son, as they were in the same class, and i just thought 'wow', and apparantly so did he, so we spent the next few months questioning our boys separately asking them if either of us were married, and when i found out the circumstances of his marriage, i felt really quilty so just had him round for a cup of tea a few times a week, then eventually on his birthday, he asked me out to dinner........and the rest is history really.



    I'm really glad you found happiness too and hope i haven't gone on too much, but not only are we both 'older' mums but we both can appreciated the values of marrying someone who hasn't chosen to be single.....i hope that doesn't offend.



    Really pleased to have found someone like you..



    Nat

  • I have become a great believer in fate - you were obviously meant to be. Certainly I am happier now than I have ever been before. H2B is fussing around me like an old Mother hen at the moment and won't let me do anything like put the rubbish out! He emails me several times a day to make sure I am OK and phoned last night to say he was going to be late and was I OK and did I need anything? Bless him image



    Hope all goes OK at the doctors today.



    Karen x
  • Hi



    Well your H2B sounds like a gem!



    I've just got back from the docs, and sadly this time its not good news....it seems that i've had an early miscarriage and proberbly because it was too soon after my last one, which was is November and was twins, so my body has yet to recover.....



    However, PLEASE don't think that i won't be supporting you all the way!! In fact, the doc gave us some good news (strange circumstances, but true!) that i obviously don't have any problem with conceiving and that women go thru a fertile peak at about 38-43 years so rather than thinking that my time is running out, in fact its only just begun!



    Anyway, going to have a quiet day and just catch up on work from home, (i'm a freelance accountant so can plan my day the way i want!), and will make sure i have a BIG glass of red tonight!



    How are you keeping, and make sure your H2B keeps us this pampering - forever!



    Take care



    Natxx

  • Hi Nat



    I am so sorry to hear your news. It must be devastating for you. I really don't know what to say except that I hope that you do manage to conceive again in the future and hope that this fertile peak works for you and your partner.



    Lots of big hugs and have a glass for me (although I prefer white). I will be thinking of you.



    Take care.



    Karen xx
  • Hi Karen



    How are you doing?! Hope that all is going really well for you and that H2B is still treating you like a princess!



    You must be really excited about a scan soon too. I think the docs offer (hate to say it) 'older' mums an extra scan or two, so you get to see the baby more than others - great!



    I had a quiet weekend and tried to put into perspective last weeks events, and am really ok with it. I think the thought of trying again could be fun, but for now i'm going to look after myself and get my health back on track and we may be off to scotland this weekend for a party, so we're just trying to keep time ticking by before we try again!



    Also, a client of mine has got a potential huge contract and needs my help to put together an all singing and dancing company profile etc, and i enjoy that side of my work (sad but true) so i may even get to atend some pretty cool meetings and pretend to be astute and businesslike!



    You take for now, and be ggod to hear from you soon



    Natxx
  • Hi Nat



    I am in an emotional void at the moment and don't know what is happening or what to expect. On Sunday I said to H2B that I didn't "feel" pregnant any more - hadn't felt sick that day, although I had been tired. I took another pregnancy test and it was positive. On Monday I had cramps on my right side. I had had twingeson both sides on and off for the past couple of weeks - usually when I got up and started walking or something similar. But on Monday it was different - shooting pains which developed into an uncomfortable ache. I phoned the doctor and they sent me to hospital.



    At the hospital they did a normal scan and could see a pregnancy sac but not anything inside it. They said that it could be because I am not as pregnant as I thought, which is a possibility as my cycle is normally longer than 28 days, or that the baby has stopped developing. I had a vaginal scan as well but the same thing showed up. I have to go back on Thursday next week for another scan to see if they can see anything or to establish whether I have had an early miscarriage.



    H2B and I have spent 2 days crying and feeling really down about it all. It is his first child and he was so happy when we found out I was pregnant. As this all kicked off at work unfortunately more people know than I would like. H2B has been great in supporting me but doesn't normally show his emotions. Last night we had a long chat about emotions and I feel better today. The funny (not really) thing is that since Monday I have felt so sick, boobs are soooooo sore and I keep falling asleep. I am hoping this is a good thing, but not building up my hopes.



    Like you I am burying myself in work. I have agreed to take on a huge challenge of dealing with something which will lead to an application being submitted to us for 4,500 houses. The largest I have ever dealt with before is 52! Nobody knows what the procedures are and I have been left to get on with it.



    Hope all goes well with you and you have better luck in the future. Will keep in touch.



    Karen xx
  • Hi you



    I'm really sorry to hear that you are going through this emotional turmoil.....its seems like its going to be a long week until next thursday. I truly hope that it comes down to you just not being as many weeks as you think. And strangely i hope the sickness and tiredness keep up.....



    Can i ask how many weeks you make yourself to be?



    I remember that sharp pains and shooting pains were a sign of things adjusting in the womb, and in every three of my lost pregnancies i had a really strong dull ache in the centre of my pelvic area which was very different to the sharp pains.



    I know that there is nothing anyone can say to make you feel any better but i will be thinking of you and please let me know how things are, if you feel up to it. Really feel for your H2B too, he must be very scared for both of you, and feeling just as anxious as you.



    Take care, (well done on the 4500 houses....?!) and keep in touch



    Natxx







  • Hi Nat



    The dates say that I am 6+4 at the moment (or 6+2 on Monday) but they said that I may only be 5 weeks and that is why they can't see anything. With my cycles being upto 32 days it is a possibility.



    I have the sharp and shooting pains but I also have a numb feeling on the right side over my hip - just feels odd. I am trying not to worry and will try and stay positive and see what happens next week. Got a letter from the hospital today asking me to make an appointment to meet the midwife team and not sure what to do.



    The 4500 houses - I work in the planning department, but don't like to say as it usually invokes a bad reaction from people image We aren't all bad - only when we get cheesed off by dodgy developers! The 4500 houses means that I have to go and look at a 133 hectare site tomorrow afternoon! Not quite sure how long that is going to take especially as it has protected woodlands, archaeologically sensitive areas, a protected watercourse and loads of listed buildings nearby. Oh well - I wanted to be busy.



    Karen xx
  • Hi Karen



    It was really good to hear from you.......how are you feeling about things now? As i mentioned before, the sharp pains may well be just settling in niggles, and i think a numbness by you hip bone is a way from where the baby is settling. Really have got my fingers crossed for you!



    I have a day off tomorrow, well i'm giving myself the day off, because my husband is home all day too, and i'm meeting up with a few girlfriends tomorrow night for a catch up....the first time since i got married in November!



    I hope tomorrow keeps you busy and you don't get lost in all the acreage! Hopefully it'll be a nice crisp day so you can feel a bit refreshed and it must be nice to get out of the office, especially as they are all concerned for you..its a constant reminder of how you are feeling.



    Have a good day and just want to let you know that i'm routing for you!



    Nat

  • thirlwallthirlwall Posts: 82
    Hi Karen



    Just wondering how you are and how things have been........are you still going for a scan tomorrow?



    Have been thinking of you....



    Natx
  • LegacyUserLegacyUser Posts: 903
    Hi Nat



    I am very confused about things at the moment. Some days I feel pregnant and other days I don't. Over the past 10 days I have had 2 small brown blood clots and 2 larger brown blood clots. After making love I have had a brownish discharge - just the once within a couple of hours and that is it. Going for the scan tomorrow and have prepared myself for the worst but at the back of my mind I keep hoping it is all OK. Doesn't help that I seem to have picked up an infection from somewhere and today has been agony - couldn't get an appointment with the doctor so hoping that the hospital can help. If not going to the docs on Friday morning.



    Work has been a nightmare with people dumping all their work on me and I threw a wobbly yesterday and complained about people taking the mickey but didn't get me anywhere. Think I might just pull a sicky for a few days if it is good news and will definately not be going back this week if it is bad news.



    Will let you know how I get on. Thanks for the kind thoughts.



    Karen xx
  • thirlwallthirlwall Posts: 82
    Hi Karen



    Good luck today.......i won't ramble on today as you're probably as nervous as anything......



    Let us know how things go.....



    Really sending you lots of love and thoughts



    Natx
  • LegacyUserLegacyUser Posts: 903
    Hi Nat



    Well, I am confused and I think the hospital are as well! I had another scan today and the first pregnancy sac has doubled in size but there still doesn't seem to be anything in it. Why it is growing if there is nothing there they don't understand. Also it is not growing as much as it should if there was something there. Added to this I now have a second pregnancy sac that wasn't there 10 days ago. That also appears to be empty but it is very tiny so they can't really tell. I think it is the size of the first one that they saw last week. I am still producing pregnancy hormones so they think there is a pregnancy somewhere, but don't know where. They can't find any signs of an ectopic pregnancy ....



    Had some blood tests today to measure the hormone levels and I have to go back on Saturday to have them remeasured to see if they are going up, down or staying the same. After this they will decide whether I have had a miscarriage or not.



    One possibility is that I have had a miscarriage but I have also become pregnant since the miscarriage. An alternative is that I have had 2 miscarriages but not discharged either of them yet.



    Not sure that all this has sunk in at the moment. I just feel like it is happening to somebody else. I am seeing my doctor tomorrow so I am going to see what he says. I don't feel like facing people at work so I might see if he will sign me off to rest, especially after having all the extra work dumped on me.



    Thanks again for your thoughts. It is nice knowing I have somebody thinking of me.



    How are you feeling now? Hope your other half is looking after you and giving you lots of love.



    Karen xx
  • thirlwallthirlwall Posts: 82
    Hi Karen



    Well you seemed to have had a very confusing appointment!!



    It seems unbelievable that with all this modern technology they cannot tell what is going on.........it almost seems that you have become pregnant again...!!??**



    I'm sure that the last few weeks have been awful and its horrible to be in limboland.....so lets hope that the time flys between now and saturdays appointment. When i miscarried in November i had a scan and they couldnt detect a heatbeat and sent me home to wait for another 10 days before the next scan, and i just spent all week watching the clock, however, nature took its course before i had the second scan. The only serene part was that it had already been confirmed that there was no longer a viable pregnancy, which is not what they are saying to you, so i'm really still thinking that you have a chance. I would think that at about 7 weeks an internal scan should surely show something??



    I'm keeping very well and decided to put baby making on hold for a few months, so i've got some herbal detox and fertility tintures from Neals yard and am going to really look after myself before trying again. I'm going to take part in the 'race for life' in June so between now and then i'm on keep fit mode. I've also booked a massage and body wrap at this beautiful thai spa just up the road from me for monday morning, so i'm taking care of me, and my husband is just brilliant and is incredibly supportive.



    You take care and of course you're going to worry, but just keep your feet up and rest, and definately don't to work!!! Sorry if i sound like a mother hen!!



    Natxx



  • thirlwallthirlwall Posts: 82
    Hi Karen



    How did the blood test go? Been thinking about you and kept everything crossed........



    Hope you're ok.



    Natx
  • LegacyUserLegacyUser Posts: 903
    Hi Nat



    The results of the first blood test were at 10,000 which was low for the time that I was supposed to be, but about right for the second pregnancy sac! The second test on Saturday showed that the levels had increased to 11,000. This isn't right as they were expecting them to be between 16,000 and 20,000. They now think that I don't have a viable pregnancy and phoned to tell me this yesterday morning. We spent yesterday crying and trying to make sense of it all and to decide which would be the best course of action.



    As I seem to have had a miscarriage over 2 weeks ago and my body hasn't dealt with it I may have to have some sort of intervention. Surgical seems too like an abortion for me and I am not sure that I could handle that and there are complicated issues in my H2B's past to deal with as well. One part of me says that my body should deal with it, but nobody knows how long that would take. The other option appears to be medical assistance to induce the miscarriage. That seems the preferred option at the moment but I am waiting for the hospital to ring me back to discuss all this.



    I spoke to my doctor this morning and he said that they should rescan before they do anything just in case there is a possibility that something viable is happening. My morning sickness kicked in again big time on Saturday morning! I have fallen asleep this afternoon and my boobs are so sore today. Obviously as I am producing the hormones my body thinks that I am pregnant.



    Part of me wants this to be all over and done with so that we can move on but a small part of me hopes that something is doing what it is supposed to be doing somewhere inside of me. We have to spend Easter weekend with my H2B's family and get his nieces to try on the flower girl dress that my friend has made for me. They are only 18 months and 3 so that is going to be torture, especially as we hadn't told them - it was going to be our Easter surprise. We aren't sure if we want to tell them what is happening now, but I think his mother will guess.



    Karen xx
  • thirlwallthirlwall Posts: 82
    Hi Karen



    I really don't know what to say, except that i'm really sorry to hear your news. There seems to be so much going on in your body at the moment.



    When i miscarried in November, they gave me the option of going home to 'wait', or to take a drug to perhaps force the miscarriage, or the medical quick way, and we chose to go home and wait. However, when it did start to happen naturally it was very scary and i felt so guilty that my husband had to return to a hospital with me, after spending so much time in and out of hospitals with his late wife. It was the last place i a) wanted to be personally and b) for his sake. So i completely understand why you are considering your H2B in the action you both decide to take.



    When are they going to rescan you? I understand also, that you need to beleive that there just might be some hope.......and until this gets confirms either way is just a nightmare for you.



    Easters going to be tough for you too, and i think if you need to break down and cry, then you must. I'm finding the looming of May a bit tough because thats when my twin pregnancy would have been due, so i'm going to plant two peonies in the garden, just quietly for us.



    Sending you all my best wishes and hope you get lots of tlc.



    Keep in touch



    Natxxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • LegacyUserLegacyUser Posts: 903
    Hi Nat



    The hospital phoned whilst I was typing my last post so I finished it in a hurry. I asked whether they would rescan before any intervention and they said no. I asked about the second sac and they said they would speak to the senior consultant and come back to me. Late yesterday evening they phoned back and said that they were now going to recommend waiting for 2 weeks and going back for another scan and then deciding what to do. I was happy with that and booked the scan for the Tuesday after Easter. The other option was the Thursday but that is the day we travel down to my H2B's family and if it was bad news I didn't want that hanging over us all Easter. When it came down to it I couldn't make a decision about intervention.



    It may all be academic now as during the evening I felt pains in my stomach and was so drained of energy. I didn't even have enough energy to drive to the next village to take my daughter's boyfriend home. I have had some bleeding - nothing major. I can only assume that my body is now planning on a natural miscarriage. The natural route is my preferred option and at least I know I am not miscarrying a "baby" as we know that there is nothing there. Doesn't stop the tears though, as I am sure you know.



    We want to mark this in some way and thinking about how we can do it. I want it to be personal and just the two of us. My daughter has been brilliant and not told anybody what is going on although we have explained everything to her along the way.



    Karen xx
  • thirlwallthirlwall Posts: 82
    Hi Karen



    How did your Easter go....it must have been very hard for you all.........and how have you been in yourself now. I haven't posted for awhile because i thought you'd need some time away from the forum, but have been thinking about you.



    We had friends down for Easter who have a 3-month old little boy, so i had a very cuddly weekend, but it did really make me think where i am in the baby stakes, and it seems so far away for us.....



    Really hope you have been coping, and are you back to work yet?



    Take care



    Nat

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