I Don't Know What I'm Doing

So, I've been reading all of your planning threads, and i thought id have a go at my own. I like the idea of having something to look back on after the 'event' and laugh at how utterly clueless i am. 

Anyway...

Our Story

Me and M have been together for nearly 9 years now. When we met, I was not in the least bit interested in getting into anything as i had only just gotten out of a long term (disastrous) relationship. My friend had recently moved in with me and we were inseparable. Anyway, M is a work colleague of this friend and we met on a works night out that i had gatecrashed. M and I didn't really talk that night, but my friend did mention that he'd asked about me. I thought no more of it, but after a couple more get togethers (where we did speak) and some rather brutal badgering from my friend, i was persuaded to go on a date with him. I wont tell the whole story of that date, but it ended in a food fight at 4am after a dance off and public vomiting. I had SUCH a laugh. 

So that was that, the 3 of us then became inseparable. He moved in, and then after a while she met someone and moved out.

And here we are 9 years, 2 house moves and a dog later...

So there you have Groom and Bridesmaid No 1 (in no particular order) 

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Posts

  • The Proposal

    M & I have not once discussed marriage in the 8 years of us being together. It wasn't a conscious decision to not talk about it, it just never came up! I'm not the type to have their entire wedding saved on pinterest within 30 minutes of "can i buy you a drink?" 

    Looking back, i do think its a bit weird now that i didn't even think about it. We'd go to wedding after wedding of family and friends and people would always ask when we were making it official but id just brush it off. I think i always assumed it would happen, i just wasn't too bothered when.

    During our 8 years together we have holidayed in a lot of places, with the south of France being very much a favourite. We've been twice before staying in both Nice and Cannes, each time visiting Monte Carlo at least once. Casino Square is my favourite place. On our first visit to Monte Carlo we went to the Casino, played on the bandits, had a drink on the patio, and on the way out M placed €50 on black, and came out with a €100 note. We then walked over to the café overlooking the roundabout and shared an ice cream whilst people watching. It was the perfect day and we’ve often spoken about it since.

    This June we went back again. We got the train from Nice to Monaco, walked along the harbour looking at all the yachts, through the tunnel, and up the hill to casino square. We walked round a little, through the Japanese Garden and up to the fountain looking over the whole of the square. M suggested we get a selfie (which should have set alarm bells ringing then as he hates photos, especially selfies!) He decided he didn’t want a selfie and said he was going to ask the couple next to us to take it, which he did. So there I am, stood smiling for the camera wondering why it was taking them so long to take the photo. Eventually I looked to M who had been stood next to me, and there he was, down on one knee and proudly showing me a small black jewellery box. The next bit I all a bit of a blur, but I remember him opening the box and the first thing I saw wasn’t the ring, but the words Tiffany & Co written across the back of the box. I screamed “ARE YOU MESSING!?” and grabbed the box. I think he’s accepted this as a yes as I never actually said it! It turns out M had pre-warned the couple about what he was about to do and the camera was set to video.

    Afterwards, we walked over to the casino and had a glass of champagne on the terrace before having a couple of goes on the bandits, M putting €50 on red this time and winning €100, before sharing an ice cream in the café overlooking the roundabout. 

    imageimage

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  • The Wedding Party

    M had already chosen his best man, well... best men. He had asked them within an hour of putting the ring on my finger! He is having his 3 best friends as equal best men. 

    My bridesmaids were all easy for me to choose, but not as straight forward as M's. I have my friend 'A' who you met above. Not only did she introduce us (so all of this is her fault) but i have known her and her whole family since we went to Nursery together. They lived at the top of our street and our mum's spent a lot of time together. I will also be godmother to her little girl come January  

    Bridesmaid 'K' is my half sister, so she was pretty much a given. Bridesmaid 'J' and 'H' are also childhood friends. We started school together at 4 years old and are still very much in contact (me with each of them, them not so much with each other) I am also godmother to their little girl and boy respectively.

    Bridesmaid 'D' is my best friend from high school. We didn't have the best of starts (i didn't like her, for absolutely no reason) but we got sat next to each other once and that was it. 

    All of my maids know each other, but only D and H are in the same circle of friends. I've not even asked them yet as i want to get them all together. I feel that the more i can get them all together, the more they can get comfortable with each other. 

    As i have 5 bridesmaids and M has 3 best men, i suggested he has his brother, and my brother as ushers to even it out. So along with our mums and dads (and their partners) there you have our wedding party! 

     

  • The 'W' Word

    Its taken me a while to get my head around the idea that I'm engaged. I have a fiancé. At first I would cringe every time I was asked about the wedding, but I think I've finally got to a place where I can actually talk about it without my palms sweating and my toes curling in my shoes! 

    Up to now M and I have sat down and gone through a guest list (our families are huge) and a budget. He initially suggested summer 2019, but we've settled on Summer 2018. I just thought 2019 seemed so far away, although I'm sure there will be times I'll wish we'd have stuck with the extra year to plan and save! We have been to a couple of wedding fayre's, and visited a couple of venues. Nothing is set in stone yet, but hopefully (in the not too distant future) we will have a date, a ceremony venue and a reception venue. 

    But for now I need a lie down...

  • Love your thread so far! Your name and title drew me in to read your thread, hopefully it'll sink in before 2018! And you are one very lucky lady, your ring is stunning. Good luck with all the planning.

  • Thanks Janey, I am indeed lucky. The pictures don't even do the ring justice, it's so sparkly!

  • Dora3Dora3 Posts: 1,218

    I LOVE your username! Just makes me smile when I see it lol. 

    Loving your story so far and look forward to reading more x 

  • Thanks Dora! Ill look forward to updating once I've pulled my finger out and made some firm decisions! We have a couple more venue viewings booked before Christmas so hopefully we'll have something in stone before the end of the year. EEK!

  • Ok, so after a busy few weeks (work wise) we have finally made a provisional booking with both venues and a registrar.

    The countdown is now on to 4th August 2018. 

    Ceremony. 

    For reasons not quite known to myself, i have always been adamant that i didn't want the ceremony venue to be the same place as the reception. I think it's got something to do with having to move everyone about to change the room around. Anyway, my first choice for the ceremony was here:

    image

    I absolutely love this building. It is the ruins of St Luke's Church, now fondly known as the Bombed Out Church since it was damaged during the Blitz. It is licenced for wedding ceremonies, however at the moment it is undergoing repairs until Spring next year and the ownership of the site is under council review. We have no idea when the outcome of this will be, or if they will even be renewing its wedding licence. So we had to draw a line through this one and look elsewhere. 

    Our second choice, and where we have booked is here: 

    image

    This is the concert room in St Georges Hall, which is a Grade I listed building, and one of Liverpool's most famous. 

    image

    Although this is our second choice, i am still in love with it. We are both very proud of our city and it's amazing architecture (we are second only to London in terms of the number of listed buildings we have) so to have these involved in our wedding was very important to us. 

  • MrsG2bxxMrsG2bxx Posts: 868

    I have been reading your thread but never got around to commenting, anyway today I was researching cake toppers for myself but came across this and thought you'd appreciate it!! :) hahahahaa!!! it's excellent!! xxx

     

    Shit Just Got Real Cake Topper, Wedding Cake Topper, Cake Topper, Cake Topper Wedding, Shit Just Got Real, Funny Wedding Cake Topper

  • haha! That's brilliant! My mother would kill me though! 

  • MashMash Posts: 73

    Bloody hell - that Venue is amazing !!!! I've never been to Liverpool so don't know it, but WOW!

     

    I also rather love your first venue, so romantic, we looked at a ruined house but it's been snaffled by English Heritage and we can't use it.... my dream was Bolsover Castle ( for years !) but they stopped doing weddings the year we got engaged.

  • MrsS85MrsS85 Posts: 688 New bride

    Your venue is beautiful, That room just looks so atmospheric if that's even possible! the ruins are also lovely but imagine the stress over the weather!

  • The ruins are amazing. The thought of it raining doesn't even bother me, I actually love the thought f everyone having umbrellas! We've already made peace that it's going to rain anyway, despite it being August. It's rained everywhere we've been, even Vegas!

    Saying that though, St Georges Hall is an amazing venue, and every room is gorgeous. The concert hall room we have chosen is my favourite, I think because it reminds me of the muppet show!*

     

    *New name for the wedding

  • I haven't read through yet, just needed to skip to the end to say I got engaged in Monaco too!

  • MashMash Posts: 73

    Ha ha yes I can just see Waldorf & thingymajig in one of the boxes heckling you during the ceremony .... and Miss Piggy draped over the grand piano while Kermit plays the entrance tune. .... hmmm maybe don't go too far down that line of thinking or your whole theme could go a bit bonkers ;) xxx

  • FutureMrsWoolgrove Favourite place 💙

    Mash, I had thought of getting Statler & Waldorf puppets in the top balcony just to see if anyone notices!

  • Libby13Libby13 Posts: 244 New bride
    ShitGotReal wrote (see post):

    Ok, so after a busy few weeks (work wise) we have finally made a provisional booking with both venues and a registrar.

    The countdown is now on to 4th August 2018. 

    Ceremony. 

    For reasons not quite known to myself, i have always been adamant that i didn't want the ceremony venue to be the same place as the reception. I think it's got something to do with having to move everyone about to change the room around. Anyway, my first choice for the ceremony was here:

    image

    I absolutely love this building. It is the ruins of St Luke's Church, now fondly known as the Bombed Out Church since it was damaged during the Blitz. It is licenced for wedding ceremonies, however at the moment it is undergoing repairs until Spring next year and the ownership of the site is under council review. We have no idea when the outcome of this will be, or if they will even be renewing its wedding licence. So we had to draw a line through this one and look elsewhere. 

    Our second choice, and where we have booked is here: 

    image

    This is the concert room in St Georges Hall, which is a Grade I listed building, and one of Liverpool's most famous. 

    image

    Although this is our second choice, i am still in love with it. We are both very proud of our city and it's amazing architecture (we are second only to London in terms of the number of listed buildings we have) so to have these involved in our wedding was very important to us. 

     

     

    Loving your planning thread so far, what a beautiful ring and venue!!

    I'm also getting married on 4th August 2018! :) 

  • Libby13, are you going to tell me that you're way ahead in the planning stages now? 

  • Reception

    So now Christmas is over and done with for another year, and I'm now answering the "When's the big day?" question with "Next year" it's time to crack on. 

    Deposits have now been paid for ceremony venue, registrar and reception venue; The Atlantic Tower, which is the white building shaped like a ship to the left of this pic: 

    image

    The hotel doesn't look much from the outside, but as ive mentioned above, both M and i are very proud of our city, and it having views overlooking the Liver Building (that massive one in the middle) which is the most famous in Liverpool, sold it to us. Plus, you cant see the outside when you're in it!

    image

    The terrace overlooking the Liver Building. 

    image

    large panoramic windows overlooking the River Mersey (where the sun sets)

    image

    We looked at A LOT of venues for our reception but i was always able to pick something about them that i'd change. This place was ideal. It was big enough, there is a seperate seating area by the bar (i hate dancefloors right on top of the bar!) and we have exclusive use of the entire floor. Also, the womens toilets are massive and have seperate pamper room! I was weirdly overexcited by this...

  • I've not had much to report on with the planning lately. I've been doing a lot of looking, but no firm decisions have been made. The next few posts will probably just be nonsense rambling and me arguing with myself. 

    Photographer


    When we went to our first wedding fayre (in what seems like forever ago now, but was actually only September) the first vendor we spoke to was a photographer. We seemed to chat for a while, mainly about how overwhelming the whole thing was, and got on well. His pictures were amazing and M had pretty much decided on him before even speaking with anyone else! After a couple more fayre's and meeting a few more photographers, i agreed the first one was the best we'd seen, so we set up a meeting at the beginning of December. This time around i didn't feel we clicked as much as before, and his prices were over £2000 for what we wanted (full day from getting ready to the evening, album and digital copies of prints) 

    http://www.matthewrycraft.co.uk/2015-a-year-of-wedding-photography/ 

    Feeling a little deflated i kept searching. I found another photographer that i liked the look of and setup a meeting just before Christmas. We got on really well and although his portfolio was not as striking as the first one, the pictures were a lot more fun. He was also £600 cheaper. I really liked him, but M couldn't shake off the first one. 

    http://hervephotography.co.uk/best-of-2015/

    Since then, ive had a look at a LOT more online portfolios, but none seem to have the same feel about them. There is only so many photo's of other people's wedding that you can look at! I am determined to get this booked as soon as possible though as all the wedding fayres start again at the end of the month and the Christmas proposal couples will be ready and eager! 

     

    Any thoughts on the above 2 photographers would be very welcome...

  • Hey!

    Just caught up with your thread ... your date is awesome (It's ours too ) and that proposal was SO cute. Also your ring is gorgeous!

    I have to go back to work but I didn't want to read & run as we've recently booked our photographer so what I would say is decide what you and H2B really want from the end result. For example my H2B isn't good a posing for photos (I on the other hand love it!!) so we knew straight away that we needed someone who was good at candid shots rather than set up ones. The other thing we considered was our venue (tipis in his paren't garden) so we needed someone who is used to working outdoors with natural light. We found a local photographer who ticked all the boxes and although he's a little pricier than we'd have liked, we know he will get some amazing shots on the day. We also met him and got on really well which I agree is really important!

    Obviously I don't know you or your fiance but the second one seems more natural and laid back, the first is a little poncy if you ask me but may work better with the style of day you're having? Ultimately it's up to you guys but those are the things I'd suggest you consider and remember that although it seems expensive, these photos will be the only lasting memories of your big day so do you really want to risk it to save a couple of hundred pounds?

    That probably hasn't helped at all ... sorry! Let us know how you get on  xx

  • I much prefer the second one. The first one doesn't seem to use natural light at all and it all seems very posed. I'd worry he'd miss all the little moments, which will be your favourite photos to look at years down the line.

  • LottiePLottieP Posts: 162

    I agree with the second one for the same reasons but it depends on what style you both prefer. We're going to be paying what your orginal person is asking for which horrified me.  That said, the OH is really into photography and really like her and her style and it includes everything!  All advice we've had is to go with the photographer to you like and connect with as the photos will be the a lasting visual memory for you.

  • Mrs AyseMrs Ayse Posts: 561

    Well done on getting all of that sorted so early on!  Once you have all your suppliers in place, you can relax and then ramp up nearer the time!  Exciting.. 

    Photographer wise, mine is a dear friend and I've been a fan of his work for years - but one of the reasons I love his work is that he loves his City.  Here is his webpage; http://www.dreemstudios.com/ 

    When he first started it was all about urban locations which I love, but he still includes that today and part of our wedding day will be rolling around the streets of London getting random shots - and then getting registered in the afternoon with the evening party going on until midnight.  Just wanted to say I love my city, you love your city - maybe a photographer that shows they love the city too - and take advantage of that in your photos?

    I know I'm rambling.. Lol x

  • Thanks everyone. I also think the 2nd, but as M was really quite passionate about the first, i didnt want to take that away from him as he hasnt really had any firm opinions about anything else yet! 

    Saying that, i spoke to him again last night and he said he was happy to go with the 2nd one as he got on with him really well. We finally agreed to go meet with one more, just as a comparison, and then make a firm decision. I'm quite lucky that a couple of our guests consider themselves as budding photographers so i'll just invite them to bring their camera along also! 

  • Colours/Theme

    So this bit kind of just sort of happened and i have no idea how or why. Not that i'm complaining. My colour is blue. Ever since i got engaged, everyone has just assumed the entire wedding would be blue, from my dress, the bridesmaids, the flowers, the decoration, the food.... you get the picture. So for this reason my colour theme is grey and yellow! 

    I've told my bridesmaids they can pick their own grey dresses. They're all so different style and shapewise that i just thought it'd be easier, however they've all agreed they would prefer to wear the same. I think they're edging towards a floor length sleeveless style, but we wont be doing any shopping until at least July (one of them is pregnant and due the beginning of June) 

    The mens suits will be navy (yes i know its a type of blue, but it doesn't count ok?) They're just having a normal 3 piece (no tails or anything) in either all navy with a grey tie, or navy suit, grey waistcoat and grey tie. I think the best men and ushers will have one way, and M will have the other so he stands out a little. (His best men and ushers are all well over 6ft, so he runs the risk of going unnoticed at 5"8!) 

    All flowers and buttonholes will be yellow. 

    image

     

  • Mrs17Mrs17 Posts: 775 New bride

    Your username makes me smile every time I see it. I'm silently stalking your thread (gorgeous ring....) and just wanted to say that is a GOOD colour scheme (although some might say I'm slightly biased about it...) x

  • Wibble2017 - Thanks! I do love the colour scheme (good choice!)  My mums favourite colour is yellow and with it being summer i thought it'd be nice and bright. M threw a spanner in the works by deciding he wanted to wear navy, but hey ho, i'm going with it!

  • Bridesmaid Proposal

    I completely forgot to mention this bit. I managed to get all of my maids together just before Christmas. It was a meticulous plan, and by that i mean i lied to each and every one of them. 

    H thought we were going the pictures, J thought she was coming for a catch up as i hadnt really seen her since she found out she as pregnant, A thought we were going to dinner and K had no idea where she was going! 

    The only one that knew was D, since she asked me outright when we'd both had a drink "Am i going to be your bridesmaid?" You've got to love her direct approach! 

    Anyway, once everyone had arrived i straight away went into the kitchen to make a drink. They were all VERY confused by this point. I poured prosecco (and a water for the pregnant one!) into mugs id had made with 2 pictures of us on (one old, one recent) and "**** Will you be my bridesmaid?" on it. **** being their nicknames - long stories...

    Anyway, I told them i had to apologise for getting them all there under false pretenses! It took them all a couple of moments to realise what was going on but when the penny finally dropped there were smiles all round! 

    Unfortunately K, my half sister, couldn't make it as my dad was supposed to be bringing her over to mine, but got himself admitted to hospital instead (don't worry, he's fine now) So i drove over to see my dad the following day and gave her hers then. 

    image

  • Flowers

    This bit is going to be short and sweet. I'm by no means a girly girl, and i have no idea about flowers. Luckily enough a family friend is a florist, and so the conversation pretty much went like this:

    "So, Aug 4th 2018, you busy?"

    "I guess i am now. Any ideas?"

    "yellow"

    "yellow what?"

    "yellow flowers"

    "any thoughts on what flowers?"

    "yellow ones"

    "i'll put some ideas together"

    So that's my florist booked! I will actually meet up with her and go through what ideas she's got, but i doubt i'll have much input! Up to now, i have 2 pictures:

    imageimage

    If anyone wants to give any input in this area, please feel free! 

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